Wondering About Schizophrenia, Do I Have It? Posted: 10-05-06 19:08pm
I'm fifteen and I think I have
schizophrenia. For the past five months
or so, i've been having a really
depressive stage. It began gradually,
then showing symptoms of mania, and I
thought I was manic depressive, as
depression runs in my family.
I would be very happy one minute, then all
of a sudden, I would get mad at my
friends, or family for nothing at all. I
had come to the conclusion I had manic
depression, but I think I might have made
this conclusion too early.
Ever since I was little, I would see
things. Minor halucinations, and a lot of
the time, extreme things. Mostly these
would happen at night, but recently, they
have been happening all throughout the
day. I feel very paranoid, constantly.
I have a paper route which I have to do in
the morning, and I feel as if people are
going to attack me, or a dog will chase
me, pretty much anything which I might be
afraid of. I will see things in the
corner of my eye, possibly a car, or a
box, and it will turn into something
instantly, and I will be very afraid. I
will have to check if its actually
there.
While I was walking home from my
girlfriends house last week, I passed
through a park. I was listening to
music(the doors, maybe that contributed?
Haha.) and then all of a sudden I felt a
strange sensation under my feet. It was
only unlevel dirt, but my brain thought I
was walking on corpses, piles of corpses.
I knew I wasn't but then I was so afraid
to look down to find if I was. I had
looked down and realized I wasn't, but I
couldn't help but think I was walking on
them. Finally, the thought disapated, and
I felt secure again. I walked further
through the park, and then had to tie my
shoes. There were vines growing through
chainlink fences, in which you can sort of
see through, all along the park, and I was
by it. I happened to glance into it, and
all of a sudden I was overcome by the
greatest fear I have ever felt.
I thought someone, or something was going
to get me. I have thoughts like this
constantly, but nothing like this. I
tried to overcome the fear, I tried to
believe it wasn't real, but I couldn't do
it. I began to run, as fast as I could, I
ran for five minutes, while crying, until
I got home. This was finally when I felt
secure.
This is only one story, but I feel
thoughts like this constantly. I will
hear voices in my head on occasion. They
are very subtle, and hard to hear though.
Also, I was listening to some music a
couple months back, and I began to think
the band was trying to tell me something.
I had heard voices telling me something, I
don't remember what they said, but I had
believed it strongly. Until I read about
the symptoms of schizophrenia, I had still
believed it. It had even happened on
multiple occasions.
I have my eyes checked regularily, and
as the doctor says, I have perfect vision.
Constantly, light will interfere with my
vision, and I wont be able to see
anything. This dosen't mean the sun is
shining, I mean any light, from a street
light, a minor reflection, will have me
blinded.
Also, for the past week I have felt a
feeling of 'spacing out' often. It feels
very similar to the effect you recieve
after smoking marijuanna. Except, it's
happening more often, and not as extreme.
I will be walking through the hallways of
my school to my locker, (aprox 3min walk)
and I may have one of these 'trips' 3 or 4
times. This is more of a recent thing, as
the past week. The other things have
happened many occasions.
There have been many other halucinations,
feelings of paranoia, a lot of confusion,
voices, and a lot of other things I just
can't think of.
If someone could reply, give a diagnosis
possibly? Some tips, help me out, I would
really apreciate it.
Thanks, cory.
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c0r3c0n3
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 05 Oct 2006 Posts: 2
Posted: 10-06-06 14:19pm
Hi, I would apreciate if someone could get
back to me, I posted this kind of late
yesterday, so no one may have read it.
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Birch
Supporter
Joined: 07 Nov 2005 Posts: 4034 Location: Bliss,
Thanks: 141
Thanked:13
Posted: 10-06-06 16:32pm
c0r3c0n3
wrote:
hi, I would apreciate if
someone could get back to me, I posted
this kind of late yesterday, so no one may
have read it.
does any mental illness run in your
family?
If you are cognizant enough to think you
have paranoid schizophrenia then you may
not have it. On the other
hand...Stranger things have happened.
Honestly, only through careful evaluation
over the course of some time with a
trained professional can a diagnosis like
this be made. Be careful not to label
yourself. You could make the road ahead
a lot rougher!
I want to share something I learned today
in a seminar about mental health. I
don't have facts and such to back it up
yet, but it was from a very, very
reputable source at a state hospital
seminar focusing on recovery from mental
illnesses.
If you have a family history of mental
illness, and if you are part of the 25% of
the population that has a certain gene
programmed in a certain way, and you smoke
marijuana in your adolescence, the chances
of you developing the mental illness
(particularly bipolar and schizophrenia)
increase dramatically. I wish I had
numbers but this study is so recent he
didn't have it out yet.
Of course, this stuff is to be taken w/ a
grain of salt. On the other hand, when
you are so young your brain isn't done
developing yet. Don't use psychotropic
substances until your brain is developed.
19, 20 or so.
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fear
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 07 Dec 2006 Posts: 5
Posted: 12-07-06 16:29pm
Don't listen to birch.
You straight-up have schizophrenia.
Theres no way you can experience all that
and just have manic-depressive disorder,
even when high on drugs you dont
experience all that.
Go see your therapist about help.