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Q: I Need Some Advice...possibly Pregnant
asked by: koa on September 4th, 2006
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
I have recently broken up with my boyfriend...And about a month ago I made a really horrible decision and I had unprotected sex with a man I barely knew. This is my week to get my period and I haven't gotten it yet. I took a pregnancy test and it was negative...But I still haven't gotten my period. I have been having some signs that indicate pregnancy though. Like I have been going to the bathroom more frequently...My breasts are fuller...I've been getting hot flashes... The thing is I have a daughter that is almost a year old...I know this sounds soooooooooooo selfish but if I am pregnant I honestly do not think I could go through with the pregnancy. I am agaisnt having an abortion but I think that it would be my only option. I don't know what I would do.....Its not just because I already have a daughter that I wouldn't want to have this baby... I just am having a lot of thoughts....I really would like some advice as to what I should do here...If you have any questions about my situation please feel free to ask...Thank you so much!!!!!!!!! :? :oops: :( :cry:
i am feeling a lot of emmotions right now....This is not something I ever dreamed of putting myself through...I regret my stupid actions
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Im Sailor replied on September 4th, 2006
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Re: I Need Some Advice...possibly Pregnant
Well. It sounds like you are pregnant. I've walked in your shoes honey, I know what you're going through. So, you have two choices: 1) you abort it - end of story. 2) you have it - then you have two choices: 1) you give it up for adoption to a family that you preview before hand and approve of - happy ending. 2) you keep it and have two children that you have to support both financially and emotionally. This is both a blessing and a diaster - potential happy ending.

Here's the bottom line. You made a stupid choice. I hope you learned from it and never repeat it. You are now faced with a serious consequence that will have a forever impact on your life and the life of another person. No one can tell you what to do because the choice you make can only be your choice and no one else's because only you have to live with it. You know in your heart what's best for you and for your family. Follow that. The first step is always the hardest. If you can't talk to your mom, go to family planning and ask to speak to a counselor so that you have a live person to discuss your feelings with. She should have a box of tissue for the discussion. Do it tomorrow. This is a turning point in your life. Make a wise choice.
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Jules replied on September 4th, 2006
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Re: I Need Some Advice...possibly Pregnant
im sailor wrote:
so, you have two choices: 1) you abort it - end of story. 2) you have it - then you have two choices: 1) you give it up for adoption to a family that you preview before hand and approve of - happy ending. 2) you keep it and have two children that you have to support both financially and emotionally. This is both a blessing and a diaster - potential happy ending.



i just want to say that when it comes to abortion it isn't as simple as 'end of story' once the procedure is done. Lots of women bitterly regret their decision and it can affect them for years. Of course, some women say it's the best thing they ever did! I'm just concerned that because koa says she is against abortion that she will fall into the former category.
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arcadia replied on September 4th, 2006
Extremely EHEALTHy
Relax, hun. You don't even know if you actually are pregnant yet. Wait a couple of days &take another test. If you are pregnant, then you definitely do have a lot of things to think about.

But .I'd just like to put in my two cents, here. One of my good friends was in an almost identical situation that you are in now. She slept with a guy she didn't know, got pregnant, &had no idea what to do. She's extremely against abortion, but she opted to do it anyway. She thought she didn't have any other choice. &.Who wants to raise a baby from some scumbag guy that you don't even know? (.That's sarcasm :p) .. Anyway, she was terrified. So she got the abortion- despite everyone begging her not to, etc etc. &.Let me tell you... She isn't the same girl anymore. It changed her completely. This was over a year ago, &she regrets it everyday of her life. She cries everyday. It's really sad. She also had a few complications with the abotion &the procedure. Now, .I'm not saying if an abortion is what you really want.. To not do it. All .I'm saying is think about it. Because it's an ugly ugly thing.

If you are pregnant, remember this baby is half yours, as well :)

.Good luck, hun!
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Mabel replied on September 4th, 2006
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You should go get a pregnancy test from your doctor or planned parenthood. If you are a week past your expected cycle start, a test should be positive by now.

If you are choosing to have sex, you need to use birth control. Don't just let any stray guy stick anything inside of you (especially himself!!!) without a condom. It is dangerous - not only from a possible pregnancy standpoint, but there are tons of diseases out there that you don't want. A condom is your best protection from diseases! They give these out .F.R.E.E at planned parenthood. And since you are only working part time while attending college (and have a minor child at home), you would more than likely qualify for free birth control as well.

Check into it. Then you won't have to feel the way you are feeling.

Good luck!
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koa replied on September 4th, 2006
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Hi everyone thank you for the advice...I will let you all know what happens...I am going to take another test...I have to say I think I am just by the way I feel...And me and two of my friends always get ours at the same time and they both have gotten theirs and I haven't.
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sandyallen replied on September 4th, 2006
Extremely EHEALTHy
Hopefully it is just stress as that will stop your periods from coming sometimes to but if you find out you are pregnany, pt is your choice and yours alone and noone has the right to judge you whatever your choice may be. I wish you all the best whatever your choice may be!
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koa replied on September 6th, 2006
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Thank you so much everyone for the advice....I took another test on monday and it was negative. I ended up gettin my period this morning....Again I was very nervous because of all the signs I was having, I am just glad that I don't have to go any further and I will not make a dumb mistake like that again. Thank you for everyone who listened and gave me advice!
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Mabel replied on September 6th, 2006
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koa wrote:
thank you so much everyone for the advice....I took another test on monday and it was negative. I ended up gettin my period this morning....Again I was very nervous because of all the signs I was having, I am just glad that I don't have to go any further and I will not make a dumb mistake like that again. Thank you for everyone who listened and gave me advice!


congrats on your period! Now go get some birth control! ;)
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