My problem seems tame in comparison to others on this forum, but its still extremely painful. My boyfriend and I have been dating 3 years and we are engaged. My feet are more than cold, they're frozen. The closer the wedding date is, the more anxious and unhappy I seem to get. I can't help but feel controlled and brainwashed in this relationship. He is never happy with the way I am and always demands change from me - he says he feels unloved because I don't show him affection and I am distant. He is always angry and freaks out at the drop of a dime. When I don't give him directions while driving in a more speedy fashion, he freaks out. When we go to my parents house, he freaks out. He constantly criticizes me on my personality and how inadequate I am. He says things like "the way you behave and act - its just not cutting it" and "i was so happy before I met you" and "i've never been so unhappy in my whole life," and when I call him out on this, he says he's justified because he's just being honest. He makes me feel responsible for his happiness and I just give up because anything I do is never good enough. Every time I feel hurt and I say why - he turns the tables and says its because I set the tone. Every time he's unhappy, its my fault. Every time i'm unhappy, its my fault. I frequently say i'm sorry and take the blame, just to stop the insanity. But even still, I am not sincere, so its still not good enough. He has been abusive at times, giving me bruises. He doesn't outright punch or hit me, but he might put a pillow over my face or drag and throw me on the bed, or one time he dragged me into the tub with my clothes still on and turned the shower on. He often pulls my arm in public or scolds me in public. He also embarrasses me in front of his friends. He's told me all of my family and friends are suckers. He, out of his own volition, supports me and pays for things, and seems happy to do so. But then in an argument he will use it for leverage. He says he pays for things because he loves me, but I feel i'm paying for it in other ways. My brother and some of my friends despise him because they've witnessed him yelling at me and criticizing me. He's even got into my friend's face and brought her to tears when she voiced her concerns about his personality. He's admitted when he's upset or angry, he just wants to destroy and he's acknowledged that he is flawed and has problems and has apologized. But is that enough? When I weigh the pros and cons of the relationship- the pros are that we have a good time when when times are good, he is generous with his time and effort except when he's angry, he supports me, he lifts me up when i'm depressed. The cons are that sometimes I censor myself because i'm afraid to make him angry, when I think about the times he's abused me I feel i'm betraying myself by staying in this relationship, my brother feels that he is evil, all my family and friends feel we are incompatible, he gets angry easily and I feel emotionally, spiritually, and physically drained. Is this relationship beyond help?