Why Is Sex So Important to a Man In a Realitionship?! Posted: 09-01-06 23:12pm
Why does he want it so much that if it
doesnt happen theres something wrong with
me! He also said it could get in the way
of a marriage plan...Dont know what to
do!!!!Please addivce!!!Freindly! Thank
you...
I am very concerned that this might
destory our realitionship. We have been
together for almost a year now and I have
known him for 3 years. In the first about
six months we were very intament with one
another...Exsample: we would make love 6
days in a week and sometimes more then
once a day. Now: once maybe twice a
week.
He feels that I dont love him as much and
that this is a proplem and that I must be
depressed or ill... Hes been resreach on
female sex drive and then asking me alot
of questions... I try to tell him i'm
just not in the mood.
I dont think I can fix this! I dont want
him to leave me I love him but I have just
let him do his thing, but theres little
pleasure on those days. I dont know what
to tell him...
Sometimes I wish I didnt care...
Why is this so important to him?!
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littlesqueaks
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 06 May 2006 Posts: 296 Location: Caldwell, Idaho
Posted: 09-01-06 23:29pm
I on;y wish I had that problem that my
boyfriend and I only had it 2-3 times a
week. Since he has been on
antidepressants his sex drive has dropped
to the point where we use to have it 2-3
times a week to now maybe once every other
week. Yes that equals out to 2 times a
month. So he should be happy with what he
does get because it could be worse!!!!
Sex should deffinantly not be the basis of
a relationship intamcy can be given in
many forms. Good luck to you and I hope
that you can make it clear to him that you
do care for him and does not have to be
shown through sex.
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Amber*Angel
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 01 Sep 2006 Posts: 6 Location: St. A's
Thank You For Your Reply. Posted: 09-02-06 00:09am
I have but maybe I just havent said the
right words...I hope that he will
uderstand that I do love him and that he
does please me when I want it...I love him
too much for this to be the main down
facter in our relationship. Thank for you
incourgement and I hope things go better
for you in yours.
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ccris123
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 01 Sep 2006 Posts: 58 Location: Kentucky
Posted: 09-04-06 23:25pm
Sounds like he has some insecurity
problems. And if he's threatening a
detour off the marriage plan because of
sex, maybe you should reconsider what and
who is important. Me and my fiance used
to do it like bunnies. We've been
together for three years now. Since then
, we've experienced my thyroid going
kapooey, my hormones being completely off
balance, cervical cancer with surgery, and
then an appendectomy a week after that
surgery. I have a full-time career, i'm
in school full time, and we have three
children we're raising together. I'm
still on restrictions for sex and i've
been sick, so we've had to do alternative
methods for a while. Before that, with
everything going on, we dwindled down to
maybe once every other week. But....Not
once has he ever said anything about it
affecting our relationship or our marriage
plans. He tells me that even though we're
not married yet, he loves me through
sickness and in health and he's more than
willing to weather the storm with me. He
has a very high libido and I know he gets
frustrated. I make sure I kiss him every
day, tell him I love him, flirt with
him.... And it works for now. I wish you
the best of luck with everything. If he
can't accept that you care for him and
find him attractive, but that sex isn't
your number one priority, then maybe it's
time to find someone who cares a little
bit more.
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Amber*Angel
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 01 Sep 2006 Posts: 6 Location: St. A's
I Talked to Him Some More Posted: 09-05-06 11:43am
Thank you for your addive, I talked with
him and when ever the subject came up I
asked him just to give me time and to let
me come around on my own...So far things
are going a little better without him
pressuring me and asking why I am
depressed hes helping out and making me
feel special! I feel like this is what I
needed to want to be more intiment with
him...Were taking things at a little
slower paste. Sorry for my spelling.
Thank you agian!
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Cha-Cha
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 30 May 2006 Posts: 151
Ive Been Through This 2 Posted: 09-05-06 12:23pm
I used to have that problem. When my
boyfriend and I started dating we would
have sex everytime we saw eachother ( wich
was every weekend because we were in
school ). Then after a year and a half..
I was never in the mood. He would want to
and we would almost due it and I would be
like.. " im not in the mood ".. I went
through this for awhile. Now my boyfriend
and I have sex like 20ish times a week..
And I feel so close to him now. Closer
then ever. We are now ( after 3 years )
engaged : )
so I would say it will all work out in
the end and your just going through a
faze.
Rachel*
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niners
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 25 Oct 2005 Posts: 31
Posted: 09-07-06 07:42am
How about doing it 2 to 3 times a year.
Your bf should feel lucky,my wifes
antidepression pills kills her sex drive.
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Amber*Angel
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 01 Sep 2006 Posts: 6 Location: St. A's
Could It Be He Just Has a Really Big Sexual Appitiete?! Posted: 09-08-06 02:20am
I dont understand, I was doing fine with
give in a little more...And that was only
days ago I had the problem of not being in
the mood. Well i'm not in the mood
agian...I know it made him really happy
that I was so sexual with him...Why does
my desire burn out so quickly?! It cant
be because hes not hot because he is! And
its not because he isnt great in bed,
cause he is! Do most women go through
this in long term relationships?!
I do love him and I want him to always
feel loved. But wounder if I dont always
make him feel that way?! Why is it I dont
feel like kissing sometimes? Is this a
problem I need to fix within myself?!
Does it just get worse?! When I force
myself it begins to annoy me when we kiss!
I know thats not suppost to happen! I'm
looking for anyone or intenerested in
ending our relationship. I love him, why
am I doing this?!
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ccris123
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 01 Sep 2006 Posts: 58 Location: Kentucky
Posted: 09-08-06 02:43am
It's always important to make yourself
happy first. Maybe you need to find out
what makes you happy before you can make
someone else happy. Otherwise, it ends in
resentment by one or both parties.
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Amber*Angel
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 01 Sep 2006 Posts: 6 Location: St. A's
I Just Noticed a Typo... Posted: 09-08-06 11:06am
Sorry I hope I didnt confuse anyone, but
when it says I 'm interested in others and
i'm looking to end it is supost say i'm
not interested and i'm not looking for it
to end.
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niners
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 25 Oct 2005 Posts: 31
Posted: 09-08-06 15:34pm
Angel,
i say stay with him, it sounds like that
he trying to wait for you to get in the
mood. It just sounds like he is getting
horny and he can stop that from happening.
One lady on here said that she had to
play with herself to get in the mood. She
said she would do it just before her
husband got home. She said her doctor
told her to try it and that it helped her.
I guess she masturbated every other day
until she raised her sex drive. Now her
sex drive is back. My wife's doctor told
her to pick a day at first and save that
for making love. It helped a little, she
also said try new positions.The bad thing
for us is we already did it in alot of
different positions. I hope everthing
works out for you, good luck!!! :)
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diamondsz
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 07 Oct 2005 Posts: 3232 Location: , Candyland-Canada
Thanks: 82
Thanked:120
Posted: 10-14-06 14:35pm
Old post but bringing up a few pointers
you need to understand and this goes for
other people as well marriage is based on
a ew things
~sex
~friendship~
and of course commitment/devotion
without any of these a relatioship lack
and will fall, there will be time where
sex wont be able to happen but to take
away from one partner their please all the
time is wrong.
If you cannot/feel up to providing there
is other things you can do to pleasure a
man/woman basically the human mind craves
sex and it is also a natural destressor so
in a way yes it is a necessity.
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Kia
Supporter
Joined: 23 Jun 2004 Posts: 6594 Location: Planet Tampaxia,
Posted: 10-15-06 05:03am
Why should marriage be based on sex?
It should be based on love and trust and
commitment.
Sex is a bonus - not a neccessity.