On 30 january 2006 I had a stillbirth I was 37 weeks with a beautiful baby girl. My angel.
I could relate to these poems when I lost her so I wanted to share them with all of your.
Im so deeply sorry about all your losses noone should have to go through that pain and sorrow.


You don't know how I feel-
please don't tell me that you do. There's just one way to know -- have
you lost a child too?
"you'll have another child!"
-- must I hear this each day?
Can I get another mother, too,
if mine should pass away?

Don't say it was "god's will" -- that's not the god I know.
Would god on purpose break my heart,
then watch as my tears flow?
"aren't you better yet?"
is that what I heard you say?
No! A part of my heart aches -- i'll always feel some pain.
You think that silence is kind,
but it hurts me even more.
I want to talk about my child
who has gone through death's door.

Don't say these things to me,
although you do mean well.
They do not take the pain away;
i must go through this hell.
I will get better slow but sure -- and it helps to have you near.
But a simple "i'm sorry you lost your child"
is all I need to hear.



I'm going to tell you something I hope you'll never have to know. I'll tell you how a heart can break & tears can constantly flow. I lost my baby girl you see, an angel in my eyes. God chose to take her hand one day & led her to the skies. But please do not forget my child she was a person too, and forever she will live inside of me & you. So, please don't ever tell me that time will heal my pain, because not even time can bring her back again. Just tell me she is happy in that land way up above. She's snuggled in an angel's wings all wrapped in mommy's love.



I thought of you and closed my eyes; and prayed to god today I asked what makes a mother and I know I heard him say.. A mother has a baby, this we know is true. But god can you be a mother, when your baby's not with you?
Yes you can, he replied with confidence in his voice I give many women babies, when they leave is not their choice. Some I send for a lifetime; and others for a day and some I send to feel your womb, but there's no need to stay.
I just don't understand this god, I want my baby here he took a breath and cleared his throat; and then I saw a tear. I wish I could show you, what your child is doing today if you could see your child smile with other kids and say "we go to earth to learn our lessons of love and life and fear, my mommy loved me oh so much, I got to come straight here..
I feel so lucky to have a mom, who had so much love for me I learned my lesson very quickly, my mommy set me free. I miss my mommy oh so much but I visit her each day when she goes to sleep, on her pillow's where I lay.
I stroke her hair and kiss her cheek; and whisper in her ear mommy don't be sad today, i'm your baby and i'm here." so you see my dear sweet one, your children are okay your babies are here in my home; and this is where they'll stay. They'll wait for you with me, until your lesson is through and on the day that you come home; they'll be at the gates for you.
So, now you see what makes a mother, it's the feeling in your heart it's the love you had so much of; right from the very start.




I've loved my child right from the start, she has taken over my entire heart I went through the labor and suffered the pain, for many long hours with nothing to gain.
I got to hold her, yes that true
but the feeling I had, I wish you all knew not hearing a cry or have her move at all seeing all my dreams crash and fall.

I've spent sleepless nights tossing and turning just to hold her once more my hearts been yearning I constantly wonder how she’d turn out to be would she love to dance like chris or love children like me?

I wish I could watch her as she learns to walk hear her voice as she starts to talk I have a child that I really love so, I am her mother yet not everyone knows

i've spent so many months feeling her grow, i've lived through it all and have nothing to show.
I don't get invited to chat with young mothers, because I don't have a baby like all of the others.

I've got some stretch marks that i'd like to hide, but I don't have a pram with a baby inside.
I don’t get to show how beautiful she is all the things mummys do, I have to miss

i don't know how long i'll be feeling like this, but one thing I know, my baby I miss.
When mother's day comes it will be very hard, I won't have any flowers, not even a card.

And just because she's not here with me, I still have a daughter I wish I could see.
But one thing I know and this is for sure, i'll be her mother forevermore!


I will post more. I have hundreds. Some comfort but some just show theres others who feel the same, you are not alone.