So I finally told her....And this is
pretty much how it went....
She came over for supper the other night,
and after I did the dishes and everything
we were just sitting down talking. My bf
ran out to the store for a few mins, and
we planned on telling her when he got
back. I was acting weird, because I was
sooooo nervous. So she knew something was
up.
When my bf got back, he just sat on the
couch and I said "mom...We're having a
baby." I know it must have been a huge
bomb to drop on her so randomly, but I
really don't think there's another way to
do it. She was sooo upset....And I felt
so bad. I've never seen her more shocked
or upset in my life. She just couldn't
believe it. I really didn't say too much,
only how long I knew I was pregnant for.
She didn't rant on like I expected her to,
I just think she was too shocked to say a
whole lot. We're goingt to tell my dad
really soon I think, but we just want to
wait until the shock of it wears off on my
mom.
As to my parents liking my bf, they're ok
with him...They think he's a nice guy, but
they don't see him as a good provider. He
used to get into a lot of trouble before
we got together, and as a result of that,
he's not very close with his parents. But
my parents don't really know about the
trouble he was in. But they generally do
like him.
So I can't believe I finally told her...
Is was definitely one of the harsedt
things i've ever had to do. I really
don't know how she feels about it....I
think i'm going to give her a few days
then call her...But where do I go from
here? <3
|
alexa84
Active User, Really EHEALTHy
Joined: 21 May 2006 Posts: 654 Location: The Good Ole Alabama
Posted: 08-23-06 19:14pm
Yea I agree, the best thing is just wait a
few days to let her think and stuff.
Everything will work out on its own :) as
much as you thought your ma was gunna
react mad, it goes to show that she loves
you and just wants the best for you. How
far along are you? I read it in your
other post but I forgot. Didnt you say
your in college??
|
HcoBrunette06
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 06 Dec 2005 Posts: 8005 Location: Missouri, United States
Thanks: 2
Thanked:1
Posted: 08-24-06 11:05am
Well good im glad you finally told her :)
shes your mom and she loves you, and just
wants the best for you so its natural for
her to act so shocked and upset, she'll
get used to the idea though, it's her
grandchild and she'll probably get excited
with the idea soon. Good luck with
telling everyone else :)
|
fun_inthesun
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 24 Aug 2006 Posts: 32 Location: Milwaukee Wisconsin
Posted: 08-24-06 12:23pm
How old are u??
|
Sophie585
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 19 Jun 2006 Posts: 141 Location: Canada
Posted: 08-24-06 14:40pm
Giving her a few days to come to terms
with me being pregnant I think is
definitely the best idea...
I'm not in college, but I was accepted for
january...But i'm not going, at least not
yet anyways. I'm 18 by the way. I'm 11
weeks pregnant. I do eventually want to
go to college, but not in the very near
future.
|
fun_inthesun
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 24 Aug 2006 Posts: 32 Location: Milwaukee Wisconsin
Posted: 08-25-06 18:46pm
I was just wondering.. I am 17 and I
havent told my mom yet either or anyone..
Only my boyfriend... I am soo nervous to
tell them.. I do have everything together
thou.. We have opened a savigs account
and have been putting money in there and
collecting things that we know we will
need..Like diapers when they go on sale
and stuff....We are ready.. We are just
afraid to tell anyone.
|
Cambion
Active User, Really EHEALTHy
Joined: 08 Nov 2005 Posts: 747
Thanks: 3
Thanked:0
Posted: 08-25-06 20:39pm
Wow...Kind of sad you were offered a
chance to go to college and you're
throwing it away for a kid, but whatever
makes you happy, I guess.
|
AyaMiyaki
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 01 Jun 2006 Posts: 8246 Location: Floating on a cloud, United States
Thanks: 168
Thanked:14
Posted: 08-25-06 20:40pm
Seriously cambion, if you're not going to
post anything supportive, could you kindly
refrain from posting at all? How rude of
you!
wow...Kind of sad you were
offered a chance to go to college and
you're throwing it away for a kid, but
whatever makes you happy, I
guess.
yeah take it from cambion. Her life
is so awesome, sitting around a complete
recluse, looking like a stretched out sack
of sh*t.
She has no self esteem, this is just her
self medication, coming here trying to
make us all feel bad. I don't think
it actually works for anyone, but it is
getting annoying.
It is possible to go to university with a
child. It's all a matter of how bad
you want it and how hard you are willing
to work. Look at you cambion, you
don't have a child and you have felt like
"it's just a matter of time before I fail
out of college", sitting around slitting
your wrists. (boohoo...Self pity keep
you company?) if you are pathetic and not
destined to make anything out of your life
you won't. I see kids who's parents
have done almost everything for them short
of whipe their ass after they take a cr*p
yet they spend their nights snorting lines
of coke, without any reasonable excuse for
not being a complete success. If you
are the type of person who has high
standards for yourself, no matter what you
have to overcome (like an accidental
pregnancy, raising a child, etc.) you
will. If you have the type of
personality where you want to succeed and
want to persevere nothing is going to stop
you from reaching your goals.
It gets my blood boiling that cambion has
come here herself in a bad spot in her
life, spilling her heart to tons of
randoms on the internet, received sympathy
and support for her anxiety, loneliness,
social problems, yet when another human
comes here out of desperation or needing
to vent she feels the need to make them
feel worse or doubt themselves. It's
pathetic.
Last edited by ThriftyGal on 08-25-06 21:19pm; edited 3 times in total
|
Sophie585
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 19 Jun 2006 Posts: 141 Location: Canada
Posted: 08-25-06 21:12pm
I would love to go to college, but
realistically, it won't work out in the
very near future. Like I said in one of
my other posts, the money I would use to
pay for tuition and books could be much
better spent on my baby.
Honestly, what are my options? There's no
point in starting in january and having a
baby not long after. I will eventually
go, but I would rather be there for my
baby. I know it would be pointless to go
in january, because I would be so stressed
out about the baby, then so busy taking
care of it I would probably flunk out
anyway. I would rather wait, and go when
I know I can devote more of my time to my
studies.
I don't think thats sad at all. And its
not about what makes me happy, its about
whats best for my child.
|
AyaMiyaki
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 01 Jun 2006 Posts: 8246 Location: Floating on a cloud, United States
Thanks: 168
Thanked:14
Posted: 08-25-06 21:20pm
Rock on, .Sophie. Don't let anyone make
you feel bad about your decision. I think
putting your child ahead of all else is a
mark of maturity and devotion. You'll
make an excellent mother. :)
school will still be there when you're
ready for it! Don't let anyone rush you!
*big hugs*
|
diamondsz
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 07 Oct 2005 Posts: 3173 Location: , Candyland-Canada
Thanks: 74
Thanked:104
Posted: 08-25-06 21:21pm
Honestly since you are still a student
finicial aid could help pay your tuition
as well help with daycare and to get back
on track!!!
I dont know what province you are in but
call around and see what they can offer
you for being a teen mom, im 22 and doing
correspondance at home, some colleges
offer that but it costs abit more. I
have two kids and am managing work, school
and kids so it can be done.
College will still be around after your
baby gets here and is big enough that you
feel comfortable leaving her/him in day
care.
I know how you feel though. Right now
i'm feeling so much pressure. I can get
a ton of money for university through my
dad's work, but if I don't start
university the fall after I graduate it
goes to less than half. It is making me
feel nervous about now, like I have too
much to do in too little time, but things
will end up fine for us, we just have to
work harder to achieve what we want than
the average girl.
|
Cambion
Active User, Really EHEALTHy
Joined: 08 Nov 2005 Posts: 747
Thanks: 3
Thanked:0
Posted: 08-26-06 00:09am
Quote:
seriously
cambion, if you're not going to post
anything supportive, could you kindly
refrain from posting at all? How rude of
you!
i could be far meaner, but I choose not to
be. I'm not being rude - unlike many of
you, i'm giving sophie a little insight
into the truth. If you can't deal with
it, then don't post in response to me.
Quote:
yeah take it from
cambion. Her life is so awesome, sitting
around a complete recluse, looking like a
stretched out sack of sh*t.
She has no self esteem, this is just her
self medication, coming here trying to
make us all feel bad. I don't think it
actually works for anyone, but it is
getting annoying.
It is possible to go to university with a
child. It's all a matter of how bad you
want it and how hard you are willing to
work. Look at you cambion, you don't have
a child and you have felt like "it's just
a matter of time before I fail out of
college", sitting around slitting your
wrists. (boohoo...Self pity keep you
company?) if you are pathetic and not
destined to make anything out of your life
you won't. I see kids who's parents have
done almost everything for them short of
whipe their ass after they take a cr*p yet
they spend their nights snorting lines of
coke, without any reasonable excuse for
not being a complete success. If you are
the type of person who has high standards
for yourself, no matter what you have to
overcome (like an accidental pregnancy,
raising a child, etc.) you will. If you
have the type of personality where you
want to succeed and want to persevere
nothing is going to stop you from reaching
your goals.
It gets my blood boiling that cambion has
come here herself in a bad spot in her
life, spilling her heart to tons of
randoms on the internet, received sympathy
and support for her anxiety, loneliness,
social problems, yet when another human
comes here out of desperation or needing
to vent she feels the need to make them
feel worse or doubt themselves. It's
pathetic.
and people as stupid as this are only
alive because it's illegal to kill them.
You keep telling yourself I come here to
make myself feel better, if that makes you
feel more secure and justified in your
little fantasy world where being pregnant
as a teen is cool or respectable.
And how do you know i'm in a "bad spot" in
my life, or that I deal with anxiety,
loneliness, or anything else you claim?
Oh, that's right...You don't actually know
any of this - you just assume my
life isn't all rainbows and puppies
because I don't coddle teen mothers and
mothers-to-be like everyone else. I offer
sympathy to people who find themselves in
bad situations against their will, not
those who choose to get themselves stuck
in said situations.
Don't reply to what I say unless you can
present a mature and logical argument. If
you can't do this, I suggest you go run
back to your room and play with your
barbies for a few more years. Kia, feel
free to lock this topic before the
brainless people start their whining and
preaching.
for most of my life, I have
been rather unsocial. In high
school, I was the quiet one with the
rather dark personality who kept to
herself. Now that I am out of
the house and in college, i'm still not
social. If it's possible, i'm
less social now than I was before.
I don't visit anyone, I don't go to
parties, and I don't speak to people.
I have 2 real friends in college,
one of which is dropping out because he
feels he's not getting anything out of the
courses. Many times I have
cried out of loneliness. I have
had so many people tell me to just go make
friends, but they have no idea how hard
that is for me.
I can't just go talk to some stranger.
Even if they start talking to me, I
usually say as little as possible.
I don't do this on purpose - it's a
natural reaction. I'm not used
to being social. I don't speak
to anyone in school that I don't know,
which is about 99% of the student body.
I don't even talk to my roommates
very much.
I'm also very anxious about getting a job.
I've never worked before, and
the thought of getting a job is very
daunting to me because it's out of the
apartment...You know, it's in a social
atmosphere. I know I need to
work so I can have some money in my pocket
for supplies (i go to an art college),
food, and the bit for the occasional trip
to the arcade for some ddr. But
I just am too damn anxious about working
because I know i'll need to interact with
others. My social skills are
pretty much nonexistant, so I don't know
how i'd survive an interview without
looking like a complete retard, or how I
could pretend to be cheerful to customers
to promote a positive image.
You would think being in college would
give me a sense of independence, and make
me more inclined to be social...But
college life has actually made me more of
a hermit than I was in high school, which
I didn't think was possible. My
life has been pretty sheltered for the
past 18 years - I never even went to visit
any friends from high school, with the
exception of my boyfriend. I
never did anything outside my house
because real civilization was about 10+
miles away and I never had any means of
transportation.
Also, my mom never encouraged me to get
out and do anything...In fact, she was
more in favor of me being a homebody so
she could keep an eye on me or something.
I don't know...Maybe she didn't
want her little baby to actually try to
have a life.
I really don't want these feelings to
interfere with the possibilty of me
finding work. As far as the
friends issue goes...Well...At some point,
I probably wouldn't care less if I had no
friends in college.
------------------------
do I have social anxiety? Or is
it something else?
I would sincerely appreciate any thoughts
on this. I know no one can
diagnose me here, but have any of you had
similar
experiences?
cambion
wrote:
hey there, sad_eyes.
To answer your questions, yes I do have a
fear of talking in public, and I usually
feel uncomfortable eating in public only
when i'm alone. I feel as if
everyone is watching me if I eat by myself
in a public place. I know I
suffer my bouts of depression, especially
when I get lonely and cry myself to sleep.
I'm in a fit of depression
right now since one of my only college
friends is leaving for good - i've been
crying about it on and off since last
night.
On a couple of occasions I tried to slit
my wrists, but I didn't give myself much
more than a scratch because I can't take
physical pain. As far as
self-esteem goes...I don't have any.
I've never believed in myself or
believed I could do anything. I
feel i'm a failure at everything and that
it will only be a matter of time before I
fail out of college. I don't
even know why I went to college - I know I
don't belong there. I don't
have the mind or the desire - I was more
or less forced into college, and i'm not
getting anything out of the experience.
My fear of working has gotten to a point
where I have contemplated suicide as a way
to escape having to actually live.
I know i'll need to get a job once I
graduate to start paying off my loans, and
I have seriously wanted to kill myself
just so I don't need to endure life.
I know, i'm a
mess..
your own words, you are a mess. Maybe
you aren't now, that is why I used past
tense in my first post. Look at you
spilling your angsty guts all over the
internet. Yes, I am really brainless.
I will go play with my barbies now,
thanks for the suggestion. It really
has been a slow boring night. (maybe
i'll even do it in your pseudo-goth way
and paint some black tears on her face and
paint her wrist with red nail polish).
Rather that than sitting around
feeling sorry for myself (like you),
scratching at my wrist with safety pins or
some other stupid crap like an angst
filled pre teen girl who is trying to over
dose on advil because mommy wouldn't let
her go to the dance. Really that is
what you remind me of. You are a
college student but at heart you are just
the pre-teen crying at night "no one
understands me, oh cruel existance!".
Boohoo. I bet while you are
sitting around drowning in your angst and
self pity, like the "tortured soul" you
are these small breaks to come here and
insult teen parents makes you forget for a
moment the fat lazy pathetic slob you
are.
So, if homicide wasn't illegal i'ld be
dead? For what reason? My ability to
reason above a preschool level? For not
crying about your insults to teen mothers?
You are an fool.
Yes you are right, my claiming you do this
to make yourself feel better, makes it
possible for me to live in my fantasy
world where being a teen parent is cool
(your proof that this is what I think is
where? For someone who states I need
to make logical arguments you sure like to
pull random facts out of your whale of an
as-s). If by me thinking being a teen
parent is cool you actually mean I think a
lot teen parents are idiots, will do a
sh*tty job, f*ck up their entire life, are
complete trash, and will never get out of
the cycle then yeah, being a teen parent
is really freaken cool. I personally
believe the majority of teen parents won't
make anything out of themselves, I don't
think they are "cool", that really has
nothing to do with me retorting to your
comments. I don't do it because I think
being a teen parent is "cool" and your
comments threaten me being able to
continue to think so, I do it because you
are a person who got on my nerves. Good
job detective. You caught me, i'm
living in a fantasy world, complete
denial, yupp, i'm saying these things to
make myself feel better... Infact i've
got to go slit my wrists now and post on a
forum about how lonely I am, that is how
bad I feel.
Signed xxx.Lo.St .So.U.Lxxx (the one with
the broading, dark personality.
*tear*)
|
Kia
Supporter
Joined: 23 Jun 2004 Posts: 6594 Location: Planet Tampaxia,
Posted: 08-26-06 03:55am
If you can't say anything nice don't say
it...
Ayamiyaki - cambion stated that it was sad
that she was giving up college - and that
is true because so many people can
succesfully do both that it is worth
trying at least.
Tanyaface - look at your own posts
goodness and you complain about
cambion...
Cambion - please don't add fuel to the
fire and respond to such things and in
such a manner - hold your head up and walk
away from it.
