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Why Can't I Have An Orgasim??!! (Page 1)

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:cry: hi, I am 24 and I have been having sex since I was 18. I have had 2 sex partners, one my ex and the other is my current boyfriend. Ever since I have been having sex I have not had an orgasim, well not sure. I have a child so I guess I have had at least one orgasim before. My problem is that I only get arroused when my partner has oral sex with me, when we have sex I try to stay in the mood but I can't because the feeling goes away and it has always been like that. When I feel like i'm about to have an orgasim it never comes out. My vagina is always wet during sex but I can't have an orgasim. Can you please help me. Tell me what I should do, I have thought about buying some sexual enhancements pills but i'm not sure that's the right thing to do. How can I have a real oragsim and continue to have them often.
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First Helper yadig4th
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replied August 12th, 2006
Oh sweety don't worry! You're perfectly normal you know! I can't have an orgasm unless I do it myself. Don't tell my hubby ;) lol and actually just because you have had a baby doesn't mean you have had an orgasm. The orgasm assists in conception for it lowers the vaginal wall to the well of semin, once the male has ejaculated. But it isn't a necessary step in the process. Try talking to your husband about it, and try different ways and techniques of have intercourse. Use toy's and other such things to assist as well. Just promise your self to not do anything that makes you uneasy, or that doesn't feel right. And trust me when you have an orgasm... You'll know!
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replied August 15th, 2006
Experienced User
Vibrator.
No joke.
Get him to use it on you, while performing oral sex.
Tip of the day ;)
worked for me!
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replied August 15th, 2006
Especially eHealthy
Just a question... Why did you say "i have a child so I guess i've had an orgasm before"?

I really hope you don't think that getting pregnant has anything to do with an orgasm... A lot of women get pregnant without orgasms. The two have nothing to do with each other.
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replied August 18th, 2006
Extremely eHealthy
Re: Why Can't I Have An Orgasim??!!
yadig4th wrote:
:cry: hi, I am 24 and I have been having sex since I was 18. I have had 2 sex partners, one my ex and the other is my current boyfriend. Ever since I have been having sex I have not had an orgasim, well not sure. I have a child so I guess I have had at least one orgasim before. My problem is that I only get arroused when my partner has oral sex with me, when we have sex I try to stay in the mood but I can't because the feeling goes away and it has always been like that. When I feel like i'm about to have an orgasim it never comes out. My vagina is always wet during sex but I can't have an orgasim. Can you please help me. Tell me what I should do, I have thought about buying some sexual enhancements pills but i'm not sure that's the right thing to do. How can I have a real oragsim and continue to have them often.



many women cant achieve orgasm while peneration but rather just oral sex. You need to find the right position in order to stimulate your clitoris druing intercourse. And by the way you comment about having at least one orgasm because you have a child doesnt make any sense. You do >n.O.T. Need to have an orgasm to become pregnant...If that was the case no one would ever be pregnant and rape victims would have orgasmed? Lol sorry that was just funny!
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replied August 18th, 2006
Re: Why Can't I Have An Orgasm??!!
yadig4th wrote:
:cry: hi, I am 24 and I have been having sex since I was 18. I have had 2 sex partners, one my ex and the other is my current boyfriend. Ever since I have been having sex I have not had an orgasm, well i'm not sure. My problem is that I only get arroused when my partner has oral sex with me, when we have sex I try to stay in the mood but I can't because the feeling goes away and it has always been like that. When I feel like i'm about to have an orgasm it never comes out. My vagina is always wet during sex but I can't have an orgasm. Can you please help me. Tell me what I should do, I have thought about buying some sexual enhancements pills but i'm not sure that's the right thing to do. How can I have a real oragsm and continue to have them often.
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replied August 21st, 2006
I Can't Orgasim And I Have Tired Everything
I have had two different partners both serious boyfriends and neither ever made me orgasim. My current boyfriend and I have tried everything. Oral doesn't do, masturbation, or intercourse. We have even tried toys. And it's not that sex doesn't feel good. I am always turned on but I just never reach the peak. Is there something I should know about?
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replied August 21st, 2006
It's All In the Mind!
I promise you it is all in your head. You are thinking about it way too much. I used to do the same thing. I always had "false" orgasims, until I finally decided to tell my husband the truth. Next thing you know, I was done worrying about trying to have one and started having them! You have to be in the mood. I promise, if you quit worrying so much it will happen!
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replied October 14th, 2007
I Can't Either
I am 25. I have had 3 partners. The first a man. the next two women. I have never had an orgasm and I don't know what is wrong with me. My partner is completely upset that she can not make me orgasm. To the point where she does not even want to try anymore for the disapointment of it. It is seriously hurting our relationship. I also bleed when I have sex. I have been to doctors and they have no explanation. I don't know what to do. I don't know what is wrong with me. Please help....
Also, she thinks i am to uptight. Could that be? I am as relaxed as i can be i think...
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replied October 14th, 2007
Especially eHealthy
Nick- you're a woman, right? I just wanted to make sure, the name threw me off.

You do need to be relaxed and let it happen. It might take a while for you to figure out what works for you- try using different positions, toys, methods, see what works. If you bleed, that's fairly common from not using lube or simply scratching (fingernails are more harmful than they look!)

If NOTHING is working, it is possible that there could be a mental or physical cause. It might help to see a sex therapist.
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replied October 14th, 2007
Nick Again
Yes. definatly a woman. my partner is upset about this and says she has never had a problem before. she is definatly more experienced than me and very frustrated. Any hints on how to talk to her about this so that she will be willing to try these other things. I think she takes it kind of personal that she can't make me orgasm. Also even when I touch myself I don't think it feels like it should. I guess I am not very sensitive. Is there anything I can do to get more sensation?
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replied October 14th, 2007
Especially eHealthy
Try to go about it in the way that you are asking for her help- since she is experienced, and a woman, (what a great situation to be in!) she is in a great position to help you get to know your body and help you learn what works.

But if you feel that you really have less sensation than you should, you should see your doctor/sex therapist.
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replied December 18th, 2007
Difficulty Having An Orgasm
I recently got involved with another woman (woman on woman) and neither of us have been so sexually stimulated - it's so intense, the kissing, the touching, the oral sex...but neither of us can have an orgasm w/o a vibrator (which has even become difficult). WHY?? it make no sense! Is it possible that we overstimulate each other???
Help
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replied December 18th, 2007
Especially eHealthy
Some women just can't have orgasm without vibrators.
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replied December 18th, 2007
I know that some women do require a vibrator, but it is not typical for either of us --- requirring a vibrator. And it's getting worse - difficult even with a vibrator.
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replied December 19th, 2007
Experienced User
Jus relax & don't think bout it. Try diff. positions. Me on top works best 4 me. U may need 2 B N a position where U or him can stimulate ur clit. I also noticed when my bf and I do a lot of 4play B4, I orgasm more, and it's more intense.

Hope I was sum help!!! GOOD LUCK!!!!
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replied May 31st, 2008
Why can't I orgasim?
This was posted by a doctor on another post here with same topic. Hope this helps either you or nick.

Lack of pleasure during sex can be due to many reasons. It doesn’t seem that frigidity is the reason for your displeasure because you like sex and enjoy masturbating. Lack of orgasm and sexual pleasure is a different sexual disorder than frigidity. Some statistics state that only 30% of sexually active women reach orgasm during the sex. Another 40% will reach the orgasm if the clitoris is stimulated during the sex. 20% can achieve orgasm only with self-satisfaction (masturbation) - you might belong here. 10% of women never achieve orgasm. The two most common reasons for lack of orgasm are not-enough sexual stimulation and psycho-emotional problems. A rare organic reason might be a large vaginal entrance and relaxed perineum where there is not enough clitoral stimulation during sex. Because you have tried many sexual techniques without success but you enjoy masturbation, you might be experiencing a mental block to satisfaction. You can consult a mental health doctor for a consultation, someone who has specialized in sexual disorders, like a sexologist.
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replied December 17th, 2008
Can't Orgasim Anymore
Me and my boyfriend have been having sex for a while now, and he's the only one i've had sex with. He's never had a problem giving me an orgasim before, but the past few times, i havn't been able too.
He's not doing anything wrong, but i just can't
Why? and how can i fix it?
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replied January 20th, 2009
hi
well orgasim is different, I've had my sex partner and husband for 10 years and orgasim has been elusive. After 10 years, I've finally gotten multiple ones and it was only because my husband experimented with his hands. I now have orgasim one after another because he found how to use his fingersa at the right spot. Up until then I thought ther was something wrong with me. Be patient and keep experimenting especially with different techinique.
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replied January 20th, 2009
HELP!
Im 21, and ive had 4 differnt sex partners.
None have ever made me orgasm.
i am unable to achive this threw masturbation either.

My current bf is un-experienced in the foreplay area and ive tried to guide him but i dont think he enjoys it as much.
He seems to prefer it and be happy with my giving him a bj, and he's satisfied.
I have mentioned to him that im not satisfied, which he laughs off.

What can i do? Its putting me off having sex, with him.
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