I just don't know what to do anymore (please dont write in to say see a doctor or therapist or meds cause I know these options already).
I just feel like nothing is important to me at all. I know that this is depression mixed with heartbreak an d so it is worse cause I feel that if I just ahd someone in my life that loved me unconditionally that I woudl be better. But that is not really the problem. When I have had that, I havent felt better, just distracted and with a bit of external gratification.
I knwo that I should learn to love myself and value my life just for being but I don't understand why. There is nothing that I feel excited about, or particularly interested in and I just don't knwo what the point is of waking up, feeling relly sad and depressed and often anxious and sometimes really irrational, and struggling through the day and then going to bed to wake up throughout the night crying and anxious and feelign so very alone, just to wake up to a new day of the same feelings.
Am I missing something cause I just dont get why I bother at all.