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19 Year Old Boy Need Advices. Help Me.

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tsmeng

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Joined: 23 Jul 2006
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19 Year Old Boy Need Advices. Help Me.
Posted: 07-23-06 09:43am

:( im 19 this year and my gf 18. We do have sex but we planned to stop having sex because the risk of pregnancy. But since past 10 days, her usual period still didnt come. So she went to a checkup and she's pregnant for 1 month. But last month her period do game. Just the latest period, late 10 days and she's pregnant. I really dont know well about pregnancy. I step up to take my responbility no matter what is going on, but my gf decided not to keep this baby. What should I do? Please give me a piece of advice. I made the biggest mistake of my life.
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natzcee

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Joined: 11 May 2006
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Location: glasgow

Posted: 07-23-06 09:48am

1st of all I think you and your gf should have a talk, maybe you and her should go see the doctor and seek advice,
ask her if she wants the baby or not,
having a baby at 18 will b realy hard, im in the same possition all tho ive decided I want to keep this baby, I know it will b realy hard but at the end of the day if your big enough to have unprotected sex then you big enough to face up to things,
i hope everything goes well 4 u n ur gf xxx
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tsmeng

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Joined: 23 Jul 2006
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Posted: 07-23-06 09:56am

Yes we did a discussion. I decided to keep, she decided to abort it. Im in a real dilemma. Im not sure what should I do.
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natzcee

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Posted: 07-23-06 10:05am

Just stand by her, give her all the support she needs! Abortin a baby can b difficult all I can say is b there 4 her thats all she'll need xx
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tsmeng

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Joined: 23 Jul 2006
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Posted: 07-23-06 10:11am

Abortion will haunt the rest of my life. I've killed my own child. I will feel guilty till the day I die.
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arcadia

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Posted: 07-23-06 10:11am

If she really &truly does not want this baby, then perhaps you should try to persuade her to take another route other than abortion. Abortion is extremely painful. Physically &emotionally. There's a good chance she'll regret it, also. Talk to her about adoption. There are soo many families out there who are unable to have children who would rather die than never have kids. Or even put up a good debate about you two raising your child together, like you want to do. You're the father, you have a say in this, too.
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natzcee

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Joined: 11 May 2006
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Location: glasgow

Posted: 07-23-06 10:20am

Well explain that too her, sorry I didnt know u felt that way, just sit have a realy good talk to her explain what u feel and fink of other things like adoption or rasin the baby with her make sure she nos all the risks of abortion like not being able to have children and things like that xxx
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tsmeng

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Joined: 23 Jul 2006
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Posted: 07-23-06 10:26am

Just a question, if she still decide go for abortion, what can I do? I really cant force her because she's the one who carrying the baby.
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natzcee

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Posted: 07-23-06 10:43am

If u explain and she sill goes ahead with it then thats upto her its her body u cnt force her to keep it, all u can do is stick by her x
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averiex

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Posted: 07-23-06 10:47am

Tell her that if she was mature enough to have intercourse with you and open her legs then she needs to be mature enough to deal with the consequences and results of those actions. It takes two to tango, and abortion is the easy way out. There is no reason a person cannot go full term and then plan adoption. If she was mature enough to have sex then she's d@mn well mature enough to carry the baby both you .A.N.D. Her have created. Although it's her body, it's both your child. Stand up for yourself. Go to her parents, go to family planning together. Do something.

If it bothers you that badly maybe she can have the baby and you can hold custody of it?


Last edited by averiex on 07-23-06 10:49am; edited 1 time in total
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tsmeng

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Posted: 07-23-06 10:47am

The very first word and very end word = abort! Im really dissapointed. Not yet discuss she already said want to eat pils. I really dont understand why she cant even try to discuss before making any decision. But I stopped her from taking the pils yet. Why couldnt she be more wise. She said it's the fate. Come on, she's not been wise enough. Im crying alone now.
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averiex

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Posted: 07-23-06 10:53am

tsmeng wrote:
the very first word and very end word = abort! Im really dissapointed. Not yet discuss she already said want to eat pils. I really dont understand why she cant even try to discuss before making any decision. But I stopped her from taking the pils yet. Why couldnt she be more wise. She said it's the fate. Come on, she's not been wise enough. Im crying alone now.



is she scared to tell her parents? Afraid of what people will say about her?


In my opinion, a parent would be more pissed off if their child aborted. In my opinion, a person that is irresponsible to have unprotected sex, get pregnant, and then throw away those responsibilities is more shameful than having this child and giving it away for adoption. If your girlfriend doesn't talk about this with you then frankly I don't think she loves you or respects your feelings. If she did she would atleast wise the world up and realize it's hurting you. She's stupid for wanting to kill the life that both of you created. The baby didn't jump on itself and create itself. You both did. Tell her to quit acting like an fool and take responsibility to these actions!
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tsmeng

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Posted: 07-23-06 11:01am

Her parents very unmatured as well to accept new things. Like old thinking, all I can said. Im not sure what should I do. Even she pissed my feelings and I realizedthat she not the one for me ( last time I used to think that but now very clear ), I dont mind if I raise the child alone. I really dont mind at all to become a single father. Eventhough, the child will without a mom, I really sorry for that. I really cant to anything and I dont even know how to punish myself. She even told me a very rude thing in this situation. She said now she only think about her future.
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averiex

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Posted: 07-23-06 11:14am

tsmeng wrote:
her parents very unmatured as well to accept new things. Like old thinking, all I can said. Im not sure what should I do. Even she pissed my feelings and I realizedthat she not the one for me ( last time I used to think that but now very clear ), I dont mind if I raise the child alone. I really dont mind at all to become a single father. Eventhough, the child will without a mom, I really sorry for that. I really cant to anything and I dont even know how to punish myself. She even told me a very rude thing in this situation. She said now she only think about her future.


then unfortunately she's going to live a very cold, lonely, unfulfilling, and stupid life.
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tsmeng

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Joined: 23 Jul 2006
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Posted: 07-23-06 11:26am

sandralynn wrote:
then maybe she shouldnt have been having sex.

I hate selfish people.


Unfortunately, sweetie, this country is blind when it comes to rights. When it concerns an abortion I think it should require both the parents signatures and if the father refuses to sign then no abortion can be done. All you liberal feminists can argue all u want about how *shes the one that has to carry the child it should be her choice* but then you turn around and demand that the women that .D.O keep their child should fight for child support since *its half the fathers responsibility*.


Make up your mind, hypocrites.


That baby is half his.. He should have say so when it concerns its welfare.

But this country caters to the immature and stupid, which is why these selfish women can do what they do. The only thing you can do is tell her how you feel, tell her you will raise the baby on your own and not expect anything from her, and if she stil aborts, leave her and find somebody that actually gives a damn about life.


Good luck, sweetie.


yes, I know. If she still stick to abortion, I will leave her for good. But the pain, my 1st own created child, the sins, will torture me day by day. Thanks for ur reply.
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