Ok... This is my delima.. !!!
Casey sr. Has been calling alot and blah blah well... His little ex-girlfriend that he cheated on me with.. Yes he did her wrong like he has done everyone else he left her...
But now she is 7 weeks pregnant. Well casey has been calling me and trying to get back with me. He says that he never loved her and that it was all a big mistake and he
wishes he could take it back. He didnt want her or her baby and he never meant to hurt me in the mean time. He's been telling me he loves me and that he wants things to work out between me and him and I know.. Trust me I know that it could never be like it was and I could never be with him again... But its so hard to talk
to him and hear him say the things he says to me.. Like he is always going to love me and he never loved nicole.. [[ his ex now ]] and he was just using her for the money she kept giving him to be with her.
Im so scared that I will never feel the way I felt about him with anyone else... Like I will only care for him that
way and I will never be happy with anyone else. I have my son yes I know.. And he is my world... But no one can look down on me for being scared about being alone. I love casey sr. So much and I have yet to move on but im just scared that i'll give in and be back
with him and hurt myself again. Its once shame on you twice shame on me and I cant let there be a third time. Its so upsetting cause its reality now... There will " never " be me and him again. We will never be the family that I wished we would be. I just needed to vent this out cause for the past 3 days its been keeping me up. Its hard enough to get sleep with a 3 week old and then adding this has been horrible. I feel
like I dont have controll of myself any more. Like I want to tell him so bad that I love him and I want to be with him and I miss him and oh my god I cant stop thinking about him... But I havent let myself do that. I know that would be the wrong thing to do. It just hurts keeping it in. Should I give it another shot..?? One side of me is yelling...
Yes go be with him he wants you and you want him and yall should be together and be the family that yall have planned for so long and the other side of me is saying what the hell is wrong with you.. Are you stupid have you lost your mind... He already has another family... You cant mean to much to him dont belive what he says...
He isnt worth the heartache. But im misserable either way... I know id be misserable with him and im misserable without him. Shouldn't I just be misserable with him and still have my family... That would make me happy..?? Oh god its like a war with myself. Its crazy to cause it's like each side is loosing. Im sorry for
how long this is but I trust you guys to be able to say how I feel... Thanx for reading and any feedback if you have gone threw the same thing.