Zanny
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Location: Preston, Lancashire United Kingdom
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Money Troubles.. =( (same As Teen Preg Forum)
Posted: 06-28-06 15:02pm
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Ok so I haven't got a job, and i'm living
at home at the moment.. But I dunno how
much longer that's gunna last. I live in
the middle of nowhere and I depend on my
parents or my brother for transport. This
is a problem for me trying to get a job,
coz they're unwilling to drive me anywhere
on a regular basis. The buses round here
come like once every 3 hours and I haven't
got the money for public transport anyway.
My parents stopped my allowance when I
left college, and said they won't give me
any more money til I get a job.. And i've
already explained the problem with that.
My boyfriend lives far away from me, and
only earns enough for him to live off so I
can't depend on him for money. Most of my
friends are off to uni soon and will live
in student accommodation, so they're
sorted, and some of my friends are quite
well off so can afford big fancy
apartments.. This is really getting to
me, because they just don't understand how
miserable I get when I talk about it to
them.
The only advice I get from them is "get a
job" and i've tried explaining how hard
that is.. The only thing I can think of
doing is selling my stuff.. I have an
apple mac laptop which I only got in may,
and I reckon I could get about £700 for
it... And I have a car (i can't drive yet
but it was a present from my parents)
which I could get a couple of hundred
pounds for.. That won't be enough for the
baby, but it's a start.
I'm dreading my dad finding out i'm
pregnant, i'm sure i'll get kicked out of
my house.. Which leaves me with no
options at all.
I just dunno what to do =(
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jaime_elms
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 12 Mar 2006
Posts: 498
Location: newcastle
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Posted: 06-28-06 15:07pm
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You say that u dont have anymoney. Yet u
have a car?? Why dont u pass ur driving
test and then u can get a job??? A baby
is going to cost alot of money. How far
along are you?
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Zanny
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Posts: 2266
Location: Preston, Lancashire United Kingdom
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Posted: 06-28-06 15:09pm
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My parents bought me the car last year,
it's an "ebay bargain" according to my
dad.. And I really don't have any money
at all. I can't pass my test, coz the
driving lessons cost money.. My parents
were paying for them, but now they refuse
to. I'm 17 weeks now.
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jaime_elms
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 12 Mar 2006
Posts: 498
Location: newcastle
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Posted: 06-28-06 15:11pm
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Sorry to here that hun, I mean when you
have the baby. Thing will be diffrent I
mean you will get help. I know they
offerd me help, and a house,. But I didnt
continue my pregnancy. Have u explained
to your parents if they maybe payed for
your driving lessons you could get a job
and maybe pay them back
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Zanny
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Location: Preston, Lancashire United Kingdom
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Posted: 06-28-06 15:14pm
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Yeah I explained that to them.. But
there's a slight problem, i've only had
about 5 lessons so far, and I wouldn't
pass my driving test til about september
anyway.. Which doesn't give me a lot of
time to earn money before the baby comes.
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jaime_elms
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 12 Mar 2006
Posts: 498
Location: newcastle
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Posted: 06-28-06 15:17pm
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Oh. I know u can do intensive course
where u can sometimes pass in 2-3 weeks..
But there expensive. I dont know, I dont
wanna be mean. But if u have no money and
no one is helpping you, do you think its
the right time for you to have this baby?
Not been mean at all its jus a question.
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Zanny
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Location: Preston, Lancashire United Kingdom
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Posted: 06-28-06 15:27pm
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I really did consider an abortion, and
adoption.. But I created this child with
the guy I love, and I can't give it up.
If that's irresponsible of me, then so be
it.. But I want this baby more than
anything.
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Sunflower_pie81
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Joined: 17 Jan 2006
Posts: 5041
Location: to hell with this crap
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Posted: 06-28-06 15:28pm
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First of all, you have to take driving
lessons before you can take your driving
test?
Second if you have a boyfriend that is
willing to be there for you and the baby
don't you think that he would do all he
could to maybe get a 2nd job to help you?
Does he realize what you are going thru
right now?
Third your going to have to tell your dad
at some point or another. If you dont'
do it soon you are going to start showing
and you aren't going to be able to hide it
from him or a potental employer. Maybe
your fears of him kicking you out aren't
true and he might be willing to help you
out in getting you a job and taking you to
and from and helping you get your test
done so that you can get to and from work.
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Emma2
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Posted: 06-28-06 15:35pm
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Wow, youre in a serious jam here! How do
you intend on provding food, clothing and
the necessary things for the child? Why
dn't you go an live with your boyfriend?
I mean, you say you love him and all but
why isnt he doing more to help his girl
and baby?
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Zanny
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Location: Preston, Lancashire United Kingdom
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Posted: 06-28-06 15:39pm
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Yeah I have to have lessons.. I could do
a 2 week driving course but my parents
won't let me.
My boyfriend already works very hard, from
about 7am-5pm.. And already complains
about the lack of sleep he gets.. So I
doubt he'd be willing to get a second job.
He loves me, and he's gunna save up as
much money as he can for when the baby
comes.. But I still don't think it'll be
enough.
I hope my dad is more understanding than
i'm expecting him to be.. I just can't
seem to pluck up the courage to talk to
him about it.
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Zanny
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Location: Preston, Lancashire United Kingdom
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Posted: 06-28-06 15:41pm
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| emma2
wrote: | | wow, youre in a serious jam
here! How do you intend on provding
food, clothing and the necessary things
for the child? Why dn't you go an live
with your boyfriend? I mean, you say you
love him and all but why isnt he doing
more to help his girl and
baby? |
i don't know.. That's the problem.. I
can't live with him coz he lives with his
mum and his sister, and there wouldn't be
enough room for me and the baby.. He says
he might get a pay-rise soon, and he'll
give me as much money as he possibly can
for the baby.. I just don't know how much
it'll be.
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Emma2
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Posted: 06-28-06 15:43pm
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| zanyzanny
wrote: | yeah I have to have
lessons.. I could do a 2 week driving
course but my parents won't let me.
My boyfriend already works very hard, from
about 7am-5pm.. And already complains
about the lack of sleep he gets.. So I
doubt he'd be willing to get a second job.
He loves me, and he's gunna save up as
much money as he can for when the baby
comes.. But I still don't think it'll be
enough.
I hope my dad is more understanding than
i'm expecting him to be.. I just can't
seem to pluck up the courage to talk to
him about it. |
ok but you havent answered the question.
Why dont you move with him? Of course his
job wont be enough...You should really
think about this hard and long and ensure
your parents are able to support you.
This is no joke and its pretty scary what
youve got yourself into. Talk to your
father asap!
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Zanny
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Posts: 2266
Location: Preston, Lancashire United Kingdom
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Posted: 06-28-06 16:00pm
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I explained in my other post, relating to
your question.
I know this isn't a joke, it's a very
serious issue which is causing me to be
depressed, and that can't be good for my
baby.
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Kia
Supporter
Joined: 23 Jun 2004
Posts: 6594
Location: Planet Tampaxia,
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Posted: 06-28-06 16:01pm
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Answered a lot on your other post hon.
I'd just like to point out that in the uk
you get hit heavily on taxes if you take
on a second job after a full time job -
you get penalised basically for working
over 39 hours per week (some of it depends
on the type of work you do) but the idea
is that this cuts back on un-employment in
this country by limiting the hours people
work so more people can work - if you can
follow that and make sense of it lol.
Also you need to ask your doctor (you
might have to go to the jobcenter/social
security office), you will need to fill in
some forms to claim your statutory
maternity pay (about £100 a week - I
think but don't quote me).
At the same time you can get forms to
apply for housing, you just need to state
that once the baby is born you will have
over-crowding in your house, parents,
brother, self, baby.
You won't get anything flashy but they are
obliged to accomodate you.
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Emma2
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Joined: 09 May 2006
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Location: Montreal, Canada
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Posted: 06-28-06 16:02pm
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| zanyzanny
wrote: | i explained in my other
post, relating to your question.
I know this isn't a joke, it's a very
serious issue which is causing me to be
depressed, and that can't be good for my
baby. |
oh sorry did not see it. There is no room
but this his is baby and hes going to have
to make sure everything ets resovled.
Your mom is a tad harsh isnt she?
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Zanny
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Posts: 2266
Location: Preston, Lancashire United Kingdom
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Posted: 06-28-06 16:08pm
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| kia_breizzze
wrote: | also you need to ask your
doctor (you might have to go to the
jobcenter/social security office), you
will need to fill in some forms to claim
your statutory maternity pay (about £100
a week - I think but don't quote me).
At the same time you can get forms to
apply for housing, you just need to state
that once the baby is born you will have
over-crowding in your house, parents,
brother, self, baby.
You won't get anything flashy but they are
obliged to accomodate
you. |
oh I didn't know about the housing thing..
I did research the maternity pay, and
you're only eligible to receive it if
you've been paying taxes for at least two
years... I think, that's what it said in
a pregnancy book I have anyway.
About the housing, I live in a 5 bedroom
house at the moment, so technically there
would be room for the baby here.. It's
just my parents not allowing it.. Would I
still be able to claim it's over-crowded?
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Zanny
Supporter
Joined: 01 Apr 2006
Posts: 2266
Location: Preston, Lancashire United Kingdom
Thanks: 40
Thanked:31
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Posted: 06-28-06 16:09pm
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| emma2
wrote: | | zanyzanny
wrote: | i explained in my other
post, relating to your question.
I know this isn't a joke, it's a very
serious issue which is causing me to be
depressed, and that can't be good for my
baby. |
oh sorry did not see it. There is no
room but this his is baby and hes going to
have to make sure everything ets resovled.
Your mom is a tad harsh isnt
she? |
yeah she is, but she's always been very
old-fashioned. She's very disappointed
that i'm keeping the baby.. I hope she
comes round to the idea soon! =(
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jaime_elms
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 12 Mar 2006
Posts: 498
Location: newcastle
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Posted: 06-28-06 16:10pm
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I totally understand hun! :d ..
| zanyzanny
wrote: | | i really did consider an
abortion, and adoption.. But I created
this child with the guy I love, and I
can't give it up. If that's
irresponsible of me, then so be it.. But
I want this baby more than
anything. |
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jaime_elms
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 12 Mar 2006
Posts: 498
Location: newcastle
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Posted: 06-28-06 16:18pm
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You should have really looked into all
this as soon as you found out you where
pregnant! U need to fill out a form at
the housing place. Jus say ur parents
wont allow u to stay at home, and they
should get a house or flat. But can take
up to 18months. But seen as ur pregnant
and alone, they may take less time. U
need to fill out a form. And alos u get a
grant when u reach a certain stage of
pregnancy, think its 500pound to get baby
things...
Also mothercare do a thing on there
website u can buy things think thats also
up too 500pound. And u pay back after
6months. Its like a loan but any pregnant
lady can have it. U buy things like prams
and things
its called 'nursery plan' its a flexible
plan.
Hope all this helps you.
"zanyzanny"]| kia_breizzze
wrote: | also you need to ask your
doctor (you might have to go to the
jobcenter/social security office), you
will need to fill in some forms to claim
your statutory maternity pay (about £100
a week - I think but don't quote me).
At the same time you can get forms to
apply for housing, you just need to state
that once the baby is born you will have
over-crowding in your house, parents,
brother, self, baby.
You won't get anything flashy but they are
obliged to accomodate
you. |
oh I didn't know about the housing thing..
I did research the maternity pay, and
you're only eligible to receive it if
you've been paying taxes for at least two
years... I think, that's what it said in
a pregnancy book I have anyway.
About the housing, I live in a 5 bedroom
house at the moment, so technically there
would be room for the baby here.. It's
just my parents not allowing it.. Would
I still be able to claim it's
over-crowded?[/quote]
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candita_sky
Advanced Support Team
Joined: 02 May 2006
Posts: 522
Location: in the land of pooh bear
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Posted: 06-28-06 17:18pm
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Oh hun I am so sorry that you are going
thru something like this. I too had a
similar prob when I was preg w/1st child.
I was 23 and still at home didnt tell my
mom till I was about 5mt along and 6 when
my mom ( I begged her to tell him ) told
my dad. He didnt want to look at me for
over a week. But when my daughter was
born he took one look at her and they are
best buds unseperatable :d by bf didnt
want anything to do with me or baby so I
wasnt getting help from him but I did it
on my own. But things are much diff here
they have public aid and link card which
is used to by food wic for formula and
public housing if you qualify. Why dont
you two get married or can you? Sorry so
long here. I do hope all will go good for
you. If you were here id let you move
here for a while. I would think that your
parents would pay for lessons so you could
drive and get a job.That would make better
sense.
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