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Money Troubles.. =( (Page 1)

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Ok so I haven't got a job, and i'm living at home at the moment.. But I dunno how much longer that's gunna last. I live in the middle of nowhere and I depend on my parents or my brother for transport. This is a problem for me trying to get a job, coz they're unwilling to drive me anywhere on a regular basis. The buses round here come like once every 3 hours and I haven't got the money for public transport anyway.

My parents stopped my allowance when I left college, and said they won't give me any more money til I get a job.. And i've already explained the problem with that.

My boyfriend lives far away from me, and only earns enough for him to live off so I can't depend on him for money. Most of my friends are off to uni soon and will live in student accommodation, so they're sorted, and some of my friends are quite well off so can afford big fancy apartments.. This is really getting to me, because they just don't understand how miserable I get when I talk about it to them.

The only advice I get from them is "get a job" and i've tried explaining how hard that is.. The only thing I can think of doing is selling my stuff.. I have an apple mac laptop which I only got in may, and I reckon I could get about £700 for it... And I have a car (i can't drive yet but it was a present from my parents) which I could get a couple of hundred pounds for.. That won't be enough for the baby, but it's a start.

I'm dreading my dad finding out i'm pregnant, i'm sure i'll get kicked out of my house.. Which leaves me with no options at all.

I just dunno what to do =(
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replied June 28th, 2006
Community Volunteer
I think it's time to sit your parents down and tell them. There is all kinds of support for young mothers. What about babysitting for the summer (to get some extra $$ and practice-) good luck!
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replied June 28th, 2006
Especially eHealthy
'mm guessing you don't have a liscense?If I were you I would drive the car to get your liscense,find a job as close to your home as possible and save(of course you'll have to get tags and stuff for it) but it will give you a start.Sell your computer if you want,it will give you a start on things and you can take it from there! I wish I could help : (
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replied June 28th, 2006
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No, I was having driving lessons, and my parents were paying for them.. But they're refusing to now.. And I can drive, but not competently enough to take my test.. I need to do my theory test and stuff too, which I can't afford.

I've decided.. Money sucks =(
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replied June 28th, 2006
Especially eHealthy
Sounds like you should talk to your parents about how, exactly, they expect you to get a job when you cannot get to a job everyday - yet you have a perfectly good car sitting there going unused because they won't help you get your liscense.

You have to step up and start doing things for yourself. If you want to get a job, take the first step to getting that job. Like getting your driver's liscense. Work on that first.

How far along are you? Babies don't need a lot of stuff. When I had my son, we survived on practically nothing for a baby. It can be done. Work on steps to make you self sufficient now.

Good luck.
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replied June 28th, 2006
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I'm 17 weeks now.. The baby is due in december. I know i've still got a while before the baby comes, but I get very depressed and I can't help thinking about money and the problems i'm gunna face.
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replied June 28th, 2006
Especially eHealthy
zanyzanny wrote:
i'm 17 weeks now.. The baby is due in december. I know i've still got a while before the baby comes, but I get very depressed and I can't help thinking about money and the problems i'm gunna face.


sweetie, that is all a fact of life now. Best just take little steps towards the future. I know this is going to sound harsh, but when you had sex and got pregnant, this is what the consequences of that were.

I'm not being judgemental and I do know it is hard. I've been there. Done that. I was 15 years old when my mom told me I could no longer live with her. Thankfully my boyfriend took me in, or i'd have been living on the street. Not that living with a drug addict was that much better - but at least I wasn't sleeping under a park bench!

Now is the time to pick yourself up and do what you have to do to move yourself forward. Being a parent (my son is older than you are now), I can say I would be livid if my son quit college and came home to live and didn't do anything at all. I would see that as him being lazy. In this life, you gotta do what you gotta do, and it is going to be an uphill battle for you now.

If your parents don't know you are pregnant, you need to tell them. At 17 weeks you are almost halfway there.
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replied June 28th, 2006
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I know.. My mum knows i'm pregnant, but my dad doesn't. I just dunno what i'm gunna do, my boyfriend still lives with his mum and his sister, so I can't live with him.

There's a couple of pubs near my house so I could see if they're hiring people for the summer there.. Then at least i'd have a source of income.

I just wish I could talk to my parents about all this.
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replied June 28th, 2006
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I know this may sound a tad harsh but it really isn't intended that way and i'm not sure how else to word it :?

But basically your situation isn't going to go away.
So the sooner you action rather than stress over the sooner you can relax knowing you are sorted.

Right now your mom is in a very difficult place, she is keeping something from her partner.
Your parents love you, they may be misguided in how they express that sometimes but then parenting doesn't come with a handbook unfortunately.

The sooner you get this pregnancy out in the open the sooner everyone can relax, and at 17 weeks if you don't tell him soon - you'll be having some explaining to do when the bump shows itself.

Tell them you wnt to get a job but that to get a job you need to be able to secure transport to and from.

I notice you are in the uk - motorway services are always hiring people and they provide transport.
Also see if there isn't a milward-brown near you - they usually run a mini bus too and the work is dead easy for good pay and they know that people are usually going to be with them short term anyway, although someone did go from nothing to associate director in 6 years, so there is opportunity to develop.

Here ya go email them a cv
hr [at] uk [dot] millwardbrown [dot] com
it's just market research

or look around/ask around/yellow pages to see if there are any other market research places in your local area many of them provide mini bus transport.
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replied June 28th, 2006
Extremely eHealthy
Personally i'ld look for a bedroom I could rent somewhere in town. If people are renting out single rooms they often do it very cheap. Maybe go to a couple churches and post on the bulliten board that you need to find one bedroom to rent. If you get any responses just explain your story, and tell them once you are living intown with them you will be able to find a job because things are close so you can start working immediatly and be able to pay by the end of the first month. If you can do this, start working, find a one bedroom to rent, you could start saving up, and looking into finding better employment and preparing yourself for the baby. A lot of times you can get goverment support, so maybe look into that. And don't be ashamed either if it comes to that, aslong as you know you are going to do better for yourself and not rely on it forever. Or maybe you can find someone you can share a two bedroom apartment with, pay half the rent for your food, and then once you have something going on for a while look into you and your boyfriend getting a place and such. And figuring out if you could finish school. I know this is hard. Me and erik are lucky because my dad, his mom, and my mom all said we could live with them. Then all we'ld have to do is pay for groceries and anything the baby would need and we can finish school and save up because we wouldn't have to be paying rent. It really sucks that your mom isn't helping you out. I know in ontario where I lived they have goverment housing where they charge you rent according to how much you are making. Me and erik were going to look into that and if you have something like that going on in your town you should too. I feel bad that your family is being so crummy. I really hope things work out for you.
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replied June 28th, 2006
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tanyaface wrote:
and figuring out if you could finish school.


i'm guessing she is done with school lol here we finish compulsory high school at 16 (.G.C.S.E's).

You have the option to do 6th form or college then uni but school is finished at 16 lol
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replied June 28th, 2006
Extremely eHealthy
kia_breizzze wrote:
tanyaface wrote:
and figuring out if you could finish school.


i'm guessing she is done with school lol here we finish compulsory high school at 16 (.G.C.S.E's).


You have the option to do 6th form or college then uni but school is finished at 16 lol


i ment university or college, cause she said she had started college. : p sorry here we just refer to it as 'school'. Like when people ask me where my sister is at I say "she's going to school in guelph" and she's in university there.
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replied June 28th, 2006
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Yeah :) I know you guys do it that way haha lol if you said to a uni student here that they were at school they'd be well annoyed.

But over in the states you guys go to school at lot longer (age wise) too because you can like go back and get your diploma and stuff can't you?

Whereas here you can do high school qualifications after school leaving age, but it doesn't count as "completeing high school" - it's kinda wierd like a totally different system :)
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replied June 28th, 2006
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Thats weird lol here we call "university" college.. Well I do anyway i've just never heard it refered to as university before I got on here lol if we drop out or whatever we can go back and get our ged which is pretty much the same as a diploma.. 90% of colleges accept students with a ged lol
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replied June 28th, 2006
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hcobrunette06 wrote:
thats weird lol here we call "university" college.. Well I do anyway i've just never heard it refered to as university before I got on here lol if we drop out or whatever we can go back and get our ged which is pretty much the same as a diploma.. 90% of colleges accept students with a ged lol


but 4 year universities generally will not accept a ged as your education. Universities are the ones you 'apply' to with a letter and usually an essay and all your school academics, achievements, etc.

College is like community college. Anyone can get into a community college ;) it is way more fun at community college. The age gap is huge and there are a lot of different kinds of classes you can take.

I loved college. ;)
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replied June 28th, 2006
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Lol I don't know what i'm going to do about college.

I have to go to an acnm college and they've got several, but none are where i'm expected to live. I want to live in nebraska because my whole live i've been saying i'm going to, and now my family expects it and my cousin that i'm very very close to always talks about how disappointed she'll be if I dont live there with her after highschool, but I have to get my bachelors degree which would be 4 years.. So that's a long time lol I guess I could do it over the computer, they offer internet courses but I think it'd be more fun to go to college at an actual college.

Wow that was completely pointless. You were just talking about you loving college so I told you that I dont know what i'm giong to do haha im a freak.

Sorry =)
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replied June 28th, 2006
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hcobrunette06 wrote:
lol I don't know what i'm going to do about college.

I have to go to an acnm college and they've got several, but none are where i'm expected to live. I want to live in nebraska because my whole live i've been saying i'm going to, and now my family expects it and my cousin that i'm very very close to always talks about how disappointed she'll be if I dont live there with her after highschool, but I have to get my bachelors degree which would be 4 years.. So that's a long time lol I guess I could do it over the computer, they offer internet courses but I think it'd be more fun to go to college at an actual college.

Wow that was completely pointless. You were just talking about you loving college so I told you that I dont know what i'm giong to do haha im a freak.

Sorry =)


internet classes = yuk! I took a couple classes that way and they were nothing like in class classes. In one internet class, we had to form into 'groups' and complete assignments. Like each person had a different portion to do. And it never failed that I got in a group with someone who didn't ever do their part - so of course, the whole group gets marked down! Gah! Also, the teachers were never as helpful as they were when you are right in front of them!

If you go to an out of state college, it will cost more.
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replied June 28th, 2006
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Yeah I know =( they've got one here in missouri, but its in kansas city and kansas city = bad so I really don't want to live there.

I'm pretty set on what I want to be I think, nurse midwife, I read up on it a lot and they make a good amount of money, at least thats what the website that I read said. Lots of school though lol
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replied June 28th, 2006
Experienced User
Why haven't you submitted your resume over the internet?

If there are places that will hire around your house why haven't you applied to them already?

Is there a mcdonalds? Bk? Arbys? Anything near you?

You aren't exactly a desireable hire, take anything you can get and I suggest you do it soon. I couldn't imagine that many employers will be all that thrilled to hire a pregnant 17 year old college drop out who will need to take several months off in a few weeks.
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replied June 28th, 2006
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Actually, most fast food places will take whatever they can get if they need the help.

Good luck zan I hope things get sorted out for you =)
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