How Do You Tell?

Johnny,
first of all depression is such a common thing and I have yet to meet someone who is overjoyed to be a part in it. It happens to us, ready or not, and I believe this is where "rolling with the punches" really becomes important. Give yourself some credit for comming to realize that you may have depression. The thing that has worked for me was counsling. I know you're probally thinking, "i'm not crazy why do I have to see a counsler", well the answer is, crazy people aren't the only people who see counslers, mostly it's people who need sombody with a neutral side to you feelings who can see things about ourselves we usually can't. It was the best thing I ever did, I feel I am now working through things, one day at a time. Good luck
lisa

I guess my biggest problem is accepting this is happening. I've spent a large part of my life working through my own stuff alone, I have very close and supportive freinds who I value dearly, but I guess i'm just one of those people who find's it difficult to ask for help.

I've pretty much come to the conclusion that I need to speak to someone about this, even if only, as you say, to get a little perspective. I am open to the idea of counseling but I have to admit to having a problem with prescribed anti-depressants. I know that they are a godsend to some, it's just a personal thing. I am however open to the idea of st johns wort giving a helping hand, so perhaps I shall investigate that a little further.

Good to hear your making progress,

take it easy...

Hi there when I read your posting I just had to reply.My brother deals with the same as you. He feels blue alot of the times and ussally doesn't know why.It gets very hard on him.Iam here no matter what he may need mostly to listen to.That brings me to my ??????? For you~~~
do you have someone to talk to ? Someone to listen and be there to have support for you? How old are you?
I hope you do.And in know way telling you what to do ~~my brother wouln't go to counsling but did go to a doc who prescribed meds.My brother quite taking them.I didn't agree with the meds.And they do great for some.
Also some areas have hotlines where you can call~~have you checked into that? That can behelpful most you can be anonymous.
Iam worried about you and will be thinking about you I hope you value yourself as important and I hope there is someone close you can confide in!!!!

Well, my plans to go and see the doctor today have to be put on hold as my daughter is off school and i'm the only one available to look after her.


Even now, after making the decision to go and speak to someone I can still hear the voice that says "it's nothing... You'll get over it... Time is a good healer...". But I will go to the doctor as soon as I can... Promise!


Whilst I have people close to me i'm not ready to talk to anyone about this, I know that a problem shared is a problem halved but at present I kinda feel like I have to get a handle on it before i'm ready to open up.
I really want to talk to my wife about this, but something is holding me back (probably the aftermath of 2003) , but I know that I will eventually have to broach the subject, so I guess i'll just have to pluck up the courage and have a heart to heart with her.

(i'm 32 by the way!)

Johnny,

i rolled with the punches too till my well I guess even with hind sight it's hard for me to pinpint the time but my mid thirties prehaps. I had health & family problems as I was growing up then I had 2 miscarriages before having my daughter at 32 (almost 33) then another miscarriage, more & continuing health problems a necessary termination then I lost my sons twin at almost 40 I had him then I lost my mother, more health problems. So somewhere in there it just all became too much to keep rolling with. My husband is very supportive, but he can only do so much. Both our children are extremely bright &

our daughter was misdiagnosed last year as having anorexia nervosa when in fact her weight loss turened out to be a result of going on the pill for 4 months due to heavy periods & cramps, this led to stress hence her body stopped converting tryptophan (which occurs naturally inlots of foods)into 5htp which is what helps regulate the brains chemicals & keep our stress levels level. So her psychiatrist (who treats the whole person not just the mind has her (she only weighs 38kgs about 82lbs)on 50mg 5htp at night plus a 30 minute walk at sunrise (a time when the brains chemicals are acted on by the sun(even if overcast) to reduce stress).

My suggestion to you is go on-line & check out tryptophan & see if you \can get it there (here it can only be gotten by a psychiatrist with special gov. Approval) if yes, try it, also the walk. Also check out other vitamins like as you said st johns wort & b6 & start taking them.

Another 2 things that help her (& me) are smile as often as possible, smiles make you & others feel good & they actually release endorphins into the brain to make you feel good chemically, no this is not a joke, it's true. Try it & see.

I do agree that you need to atlk to someone, but you mentioned a bad 2003 & I wondered if it was just bad for you or also for your wife, in which case she may also be feeling bad & feel unable to load you down with it?? Perhaps if you could have your daughter looked after for a whole night or even weekend so that you & your wife could get some rest/quality time & then talk about how you & maybe she are/is feeling & ways to resolve what is happening/has happened??

Time does heal, but if you have too much, then sometimes there just isn't enough time to heal one thing before the next & next etc especially when you have children.

Good luck

Hi again my brother is 30~and he hears those same things~and it does keep him going~ do you normally confide in your wife about other things?
If you do ~talk to her I agree iam sure she is feeling it yes it is my brother and even if he tries to hide it I can tell the minute he calls or walks in the door!!!!!!!!
Talk to her first it's amazing what strength love and support a loving spouse or friend can give you!!!!!!
Thinking of you

Hi how are you doing?

Hello,

well, i've been to see my doc', who was most understanding i'm glad to say. He has given me the name of a local pharmacist who is familiar with the taking of st john's wort and has arranged for me to speak to a counseler, so a positive step has been taken.

I managed to have a talk with my wife, who has also been very understanding and obviously glad that I have opened up and told her about where I am at present. Within myself is still something of a roller coaster, getting on with the day to day business but still feeling empty and kinda numb most of the time. My sense of self worth is still present (i think that is too deeply ingrained to leave me), I guess I just have to accept that it's going to take a little longer to bounce back this time...

Iam very glad and I hope the positive steps you have taken
reward you immensly!!
Iam glad you also talked with your wife and that she was very helpful
and will stand by you.Your child has unconditional love~
i wish the best for you and I wish my brother would be able to make those same steps as you have~~but maybe onne day he will!!!
I will be thinking of you and god bless!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I have battled drepression most of my adult life and would hate to see any on have to fight it alone. First and foremost talk to your doctor there is lots of help out there. My prayers are with you. Carol

I think that while most people suffer from depression at one time or another, it is very diefferent for eveyone.

I just have a huge problem with medicating depression. If it is a chronic issue, then by all means, get something to help. But if you are just going through a tough spot in an otherwise happy exsistance there are things other than meds to help. Excercise, write in a journal, talk to someone, take a class, find an interesting hobby. I think that most people just need some space and time to relax and unwind. I am a big fan of writing, but that is just what works for me.

I don't mean to sound critical of meds, but it seems like everyone is on them these days........I just don't think they are the only answer.