Hey,
you sound exatly like me, I havent had many boyfriends and I have always amired older women and never really thought about them sexually untill I realised I could be gay or bi.
I now think it is just about two people who love each other no matter what the sex you both are.
Someone told me that your feelings and body will tell you, meaning that butterflys in your tummy when you see that person,your whole being lighting up when ypou are with them.
Regarding the mother thing that could be a issue, I did have issues with mine which I have and am looking at.

All the best love:0)

that of the butterflies in your tummy is overrated. When I was younger I thought that was it but after being ditched after ditched with guys I felt butterflies for I learned that true love was not defined by butterflies but in their capabalities of commitment, understanding and sacrifice. Now that's how I fall in love.

But going to the topic a coworker of mine is married to a woman 10 years older than him. They are doing okay. I was told they did had problems (of sexual nature)at some point for her older age. She doesn't want that he looks young because the people at work make fun of them. In spite all they have had a succesful marriage I believe it is because he is a very good man like few out there that loves her and sacrifices for her no matter what.

This is how I am as well. I am not sure when it began for me, but theres something that stands out in my mind. I was 13 , at my Christian camp, and was just completely obsessed with my camp counselor. I would get excited to be around her or talk to her and make up things so that she'd have to take me to the side and talk. She would dominate my thoughts later when I went home and later when I returned to camp, I made sure to make the request to have her as a counselor again.

I've read that this attraction to older women can be a result of an older woman accidentally stimulating you at a younger age. I definitely had those "warm" feelings when talking to her but as a result of my very sheltered upbringing, I still had no idea about sex.

Anyway, that was a long story. I still have a HUGE thing for older women. Men just cannot compare. Girls my age can't live up. Women are the only way to go for me these days.