First you need to try to find someone you can talk to and fully be yourself. An isolated person sinks into the illusion of separateness and becomes a diseased organism. If you can alleviate the feeling that you're alone, that's a big step.
Secondly, exercise every day. This may seem like simpleton advice, but in my opinion all the blood pressure medication that people are prescribed isn't needed if people would just get into the habit of brisk walk.
Cbt therapy is good for anxiety. Therapy in general can help. But if you really wanted to die, you would have killed yourself. You want to live, but you are desperately yearning for someone to understand you and care for you. I've been there, most people have.
Keep on going! Things can get better! God bless.