Medical Questions > Parenting > Single Parents Forum

Single Teen Mom to a 5 Year Old!

I am kelly, 18, and a single mom to a wonderful little girl! She is 5 years old and so smart! Her father left when I was 5 months pregnant. Last time I heard, he was in jail for possesion of a concieled firearm and narcodics. I sometimes wonder how horrible mine and christina's life would have been if he didn't leave me! I haven't dated hardly at all, because when I start to date someone and they find out that I have a 5 year old they flip! Any advice?

Kelly
Did you find this post helpful?
|

replied January 6th, 2004
Experienced User
Kelly

the young men in your age group typically do not respond well to single mothers.

You have several options.

1. Dating slightly outside of your age group,
2. Contacting your local parents without partners group
3. Involving yourself in local mised social groups
4. Involving yourself in local church groups.

If you would prefer to stay in the 18-21 yo age group, then it becomes a numbers game. By that I mean socialising as widely as possible (with friendship in mind as a starting point) will give you the best chance of meeting a young man mature enough to appreciate your responsibilities.

Mike
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied January 6th, 2004
Experienced User
Thank you very much for the advice and suggestions mike!!

Kel
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied January 7th, 2004
Hey
I agree with mike. Do something different. I know in church group guys that are like 19-21 are alot more mature than other guys. I noticed that in my church. Hey my daughter is 2 1/2 and I don't date at all. I am 17. My life is revolved around my daughter. Thats great you and your baby father aren't together. I agree with mike about the friendship issue. Friendship should always be first because you don't want to rush into thing.

Love

ne-ne
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied February 23rd, 2004
Teen Mother to a 4 Year Old.
I am 16 and it seems like I am single because the father to both of my kids is hardly ever around. I know alot of guys who try to go out with me but I turn them down because i'm stupid and I know my kids father love me and wouldn't cheat on me.

What should I do?
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied April 29th, 2004
Re: Single Teen Mom to a 5 Year Old!
Hi. Kelly. Don't be dismaid. There a a lot of but head guys out there that don't want anything to do with women with kids. You don't want to be with a guy like that any way. You will find the right guy that will love you and your kids. Just give it time!! The only thing is, be careful for the guys that will say just what you want to hear, but don't mean it and only want to get you in bed. Believe it or not I am a single parent father with 2 children and I have run across the same thing with women taking off when they hear about my kids. And I say f__kem. Mike
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied December 10th, 2004
I can't speak for all men. To me it would not matter what age I was or you were when it comes to dating, I would be finding out what type of person you would be even if you did not have a child, because we all no that girls become more monogamous after they give birth out of necessity.
There is a leap which has to be taken which is not unnatural to men this is a mistake that the previous reply made. We are faced with the decision of skipping all that we we thought would probably happen and jump right into being a daddy type, again this feels very natural for us, it's in our blood, don't be surprized if it takes a little longer, younger men may be better for you because they are not as de-sensitized to your situation, if he shows effort that he wants to be a team player then what does it matter what age he is?
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied October 13th, 2005
Might Become a Teenage Mom
Im 14 turning 15 soon and me and my boyfriend have sex regularly. Im suppsose to get my period like yesturday but nope. So I might be pregnaunt but if I am. How would I tell my parents and what kind of job could I get to support my baby.
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied January 3rd, 2006
No!
I hate to say this because I think it is a horrible experience, but think about having an abortion. A girl at your age has too much of a life ahead to have a child. You will not be able to get a job without a diploma or at least not one that will support you and your child. Please use condoms!
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied January 3rd, 2006
No!
I hate to say this because I think it is a horrible experience, but think about having an abortion. A girl at your age has too much of a life ahead to have a child. You will not be able to get a job without a diploma or at least not one that will support you and your child. Please use condoms!
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied March 4th, 2009
how do we help
My sister is an 18 yr old single mother of an 9-month old baby, and she is constantly putting boys before her daughter. My sister lives at home and depends on my mom for support. She lets her daughter sit in the high-chair or in the play pen all day. Half the time she doesn't even bother to dress her. She will sit in wet diapers for hours until someone comes home and comments about it. My sister simply doesn't get it. We try to encourage her to take the baby to the park, for a walk, or anything to place the focus on mother daughter time. Don't get me wrong, the baby is not neglected since there are 11 people that live at home, the baby gets attention from all her aunts and her uncle daily. But its not from her mother, and we don't know what to do to change my sisters thinking. We have tried talking to her, but she refuses to listen.
Her daughter was with me when she took her first steps, her mom wasn't even there to see.

I just feel helpless.
Anyone have any suggestions about what to do?
|
Did you find this post helpful?

User Profile
replied May 24th, 2009
Supporter
i had my son when i was 20. i dated older mature men. you have to find a guy who loves kids, and dont have a problem with it. i never had any problems with finding someone like that. some young guys will have a problem, and if they do just kindly move on. be upfront in the begining, so you dont waist anyone's time.
there was on guy who acted like he couldnt stand my son, and he had children, so i dumped him.
|
Did you find this post helpful?

User Profile
replied January 19th, 2010
Experienced User
May I recommend sifting through college kids your age?

It's really important to look outside of your 'clique' too.
|
Did you find this post helpful?
Quick Reply
Answers to Similar Questions
User Profile
Dr. Kokil Mathur
User Profile
Dr. Kokil Mathur
User Profile
Dr. Nikola Gjuzelov
User Profile
Dr. Kokil Mathur
User Profile
Dr. Kokil Mathur