|
goin_crazy
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 18 Apr 2006 Posts: 8 Location: wilmington, ohio
|
I Need Legal Advice
Posted: 04-18-06 10:50am
|
|
|
|
Ok, I just found out that I am 2 months
pregnant, and my mom said that since I am
still a minor, she can take my baby from
me. Can she do that? Because I dont want
anyone to take my baby. And if I did give
my baby up for adoption, could I let my
friend adopt it even if she has 4 kids
already?
|
|
|
|
|
 |
|
hopefulmjz
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 31 Mar 2005 Posts: 4777 Location: , USA
Thanks: 3
Thanked:11
|
Posted: 04-18-06 11:16am
|
|
|
|
|
I don't know any legalities of things like
this, but i'm almost positive she can not
take that baby from you no matter what
your age. The baby is developing inside
you, therefore you are the mother. Unless
you consent to her taking the baby then
i'm pretty sure she can't.
About letting your friend adopt the baby.
I *think* there are ways you can choose
the adoptive parents, I think they just
have to go through all the steps just like
any other adoptions. Good luck and don't
worry about your mom taking the baby,
she's nuts!
|
|
|
|
|
 |
Mabel
Moderator
Joined: 09 Mar 2006 Posts: 8963 Location: Grinning like a Cheshire Cat,
Thanks: 179
Thanked:198
|
Posted: 04-18-06 11:37am
|
|
|
|
|
How old are you? That may make a
difference.
|
|
|
|
|
 |
|
ssparklers26
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 21 Jan 2006 Posts: 76
|
Posted: 04-18-06 16:40pm
|
|
|
|
|
In most states ( I believe) becoming
pregnant automatically emancipates you.
Which means you automatically become a
legal adult in the eyes of the law. You
have the right to make desicions about
your childs healthcare, and living
situation. If this wasn't so then doctors
could take away any minors baby and give
it up for adoption. I would recommend
talking to your mom, it's sounds like she
is trying to scare you into a: an
abortion, b: giving the baby up or c:
giving the baby to her. Remember this is
your desicion not hers. And if you need
help with specifics. Usually there is
someone through the state that can help
you. Good luck and
best wishes kat
|
|
|
|
|
 |
Mabel
Moderator
Joined: 09 Mar 2006 Posts: 8963 Location: Grinning like a Cheshire Cat,
Thanks: 179
Thanked:198
|
Posted: 04-18-06 16:45pm
|
|
|
|
|
Having a baby or getting pregnant does not
automatically emancipate you.
And she hasn't ever said what her age is,
which would be a factor in this. Is her
mother fully supporting her? Will her
mother also be fully supporting this baby?
|
|
|
|
|
 |
|
goin_crazy
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 18 Apr 2006 Posts: 8 Location: wilmington, ohio
|
Posted: 04-18-06 17:01pm
|
|
|
|
|
I am 15, I will be 16 in june. The baby's
father is still in the picture, and he is
trying to really help me as much as he
can. The only problem is that he works at
a really crappy paying job. I have told
my mom that no matter what, she wasnt
going to take my baby from me. I am just
scared that she will find a way. My step
dad is the reall problem. He is always
putting me down emotionally, and I dont
want him to raise or even be around my
baby while it is growing up. I dont have
a job, so if my mom tried to say that I
was unfit to take care of my baby,
technically she would be right. But I
have so many people that are on my side of
things and want to help me. My friends
mom wants to help me. My other friends
aunt wants to help me as much as possible.
But the thing is, I dont know for sure if
I can even carry the baby the whole 9
months. I am just so confused right now.
If I can get as much advice as
possible,it would help alot.
|
|
|
|
|
 |
|
ssparklers26
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 21 Jan 2006 Posts: 76
|
Thanks..
Posted: 04-19-06 09:28am
|
|
|
|
|
I stand corrected I was told by afriend
who was here that this was so. Apparently
she was wrong. Apologies if I led anyone
astray. Hope things go well. Maybe
talking to your mom might help. Letting
her know that you need and want her help.
Maybe just maybe she's afraid that now
that your pregnant you won't need her
anymore. It could be the total opposite
she could have the feeling that she's
going to have to raise this child all by
herself. Either way if you talk to her
calmly (not that you aren't already) maybe
she'll see that things can be worked out.
I imangine your not the only one feeling
the shock of the situation. And we all
know that shock affects us strangely.
The best of luck to you. Kat
|
|
|
|
|
 |
|
goin_crazy
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 18 Apr 2006 Posts: 8 Location: wilmington, ohio
|
Posted: 04-20-06 15:37pm
|
|
|
|
|
So if my mom feels that I am unfit to be a
mother, she can try to take my baby? That
cant be right. If I am the mother, and my
boyfriend is over 18, I can sign over my
rights to him. Right?
|
|
|
|
|
 |
Mabel
Moderator
Joined: 09 Mar 2006 Posts: 8963 Location: Grinning like a Cheshire Cat,
Thanks: 179
Thanked:198
|
Posted: 04-20-06 15:38pm
|
|
|
|
|
| goin_crazy
wrote: | | so if my mom feels that I am
unfit to be a mother, she can try to take
my baby? That cant be right. If I am
the mother, and my boyfriend is over 18, I
can sign over my rights to him.
Right? |
do not ever sign over your rights to your
child. To anyone.
|
|
|
|
|
 |
sandyallen
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 02 Feb 2004 Posts: 4580
Thanks: 1
Thanked:0
|
Posted: 04-20-06 16:01pm
|
|
|
|
|
The best thing is is to talk to a state
social service administrator or even a
worker, they can get you in touch with the
legal department, calm ddown and try to
talk to your mom. Try to remember that
stress is not good on any pregnancy, just
remember that you do have people on your
side and try to remain positive! We are
here if you need to vent or if you need to
talk! I have a big shoulder and I do
understand these things! Your mom could
be in a little bit of a shock too so give
it time.
Good luck to you!
Keep us posted!
|
|
|
|
|
 |
|
Eyes Wide Shut
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 04 Jan 2006 Posts: 7892 Location: *UPTOWN*NEW ORLEANS*, La
|
Posted: 04-20-06 16:29pm
|
|
|
|
|
| goin_crazy
wrote: | | so if my mom feels that I am
unfit to be a mother, she can try to take
my baby? That cant be right. If I am
the mother, and my boyfriend is over 18, I
can sign over my rights to him.
Right? |
this is a very very touchy situation.
Your mother could actually claim
statiotory rape because your man is over
the legal age and you aren't. The laws in
your state might differ though.
I don't want to be the lemon in all of
this, but it sounds to me like your mother
would be supporting your baby anyways.
You don't have a job and your man can't
make the ends meet for himself, let alone
you and a baby. If you really and truely
want the .B.E.S.T for your baby, you might
want to consider it. It's not like she
would keep the baby away from you forever.
Her motives might not be as cruel as your
taking them. She might just want you to
have an opportunity to get yourself
financially stable to be able to raise
your baby and give him/her the life it
deserves.
Have you gone to a doctor yet?? If not, I
highly suggest you do soon.
Sarah
|
|
|
|
|
 |
|
neeko177
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 16 Feb 2005 Posts: 427
|
Posted: 04-20-06 16:32pm
|
|
|
|
|
Your mom would have to basicly take you to
court and prove you to be unable to care
for your baby, unstable etc... And your
financial situation would not be a factor
in that.. And also, there is assistance
programs you could be on (not sure where u
live) that will help you out financially.
I live in canada and basicly once you have
a child you have every right on your own
child as your mother has with you
regardless of your age. I was 17 when I
got pregnant, with the father still in the
picture and his mom thought we could not
do it and was talking about taking it from
us. All she had against us was our
financial situation and age.. (now 18 and
20) and she was basicly just laughed at by
her lawyer saying she did not have good
enough reason to try to take this child.
If you want to keep your baby, watch what
you do.. Dont be around drugs or drinking
etc your bf too and take good care of
urself while carrying the baby.. Dont do
anything that she could use against you
and you should be fine. My boyfriends mom
got nowhere. I am due in a week and cant
wait. Oh, and with the adoption
thing...You can chose the parents but they
still have to go through the whole
adoption process.. Either that or file
for custody.. But I dont recomend you
sign over custody of ur child to anyone..
|
|
|
|
|
 |
|
Kimmeh
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 11 Jul 2005 Posts: 1104 Location: Calgary, Alberta, Canada
|
Posted: 04-20-06 16:34pm
|
|
|
|
|
I didn't read all the posts so this could
have been said already but she can't just
take your baby, she could go through court
and claim you as an unfit parent and then
ask and be granted custody, but she'd have
to prove that. I reccomend if you do or
act in any way that could be frowned apon
in court to stop and clean up your life
style, even if it means a boring life for
you.
If your friend is legally an adult and you
both consent to the adoption then yes you
should be able to proceed without
complications.
Also if she wants the baby because you
plan on adopting it outside the family
that is another matter. You will have to
show the courts why you don't want her to
be involved in your childs life because
judges usually like to keep children
within their own families if at all
possible.
Good luck.
|
|
|
|
|
 |
|
Kimmeh
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 11 Jul 2005 Posts: 1104 Location: Calgary, Alberta, Canada
|
Posted: 04-20-06 18:57pm
|
|
|
|
|
Hmm well no offence but the .U.S legal
system is crap. Thank .God for canada.
|
|
|
|
|
 |
|
Eyes Wide Shut
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 04 Jan 2006 Posts: 7892 Location: *UPTOWN*NEW ORLEANS*, La
|
Posted: 04-20-06 20:44pm
|
|
|
|
|
Lol...Canada has always been somewhere
where i'd like to visit.
Is is super cold up there during the
winter months?!? I could only imagine!!
I'm soooo used to the humid non-winter
weather down here in .New .Orleans, i'd
prob. Freeze to death!!!
Sarah
|
|
|
|
|
 |
|
neeko177
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 16 Feb 2005 Posts: 427
|
Posted: 04-20-06 21:48pm
|
|
|
|
|
We definately have cold winters although I
have nothing to compare it too cuz I have
lived here my whole life. This year wasnt
that bad at all.
|
|
|
|
|
 |
sandyallen
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 02 Feb 2004 Posts: 4580
Thanks: 1
Thanked:0
|
Posted: 04-20-06 22:59pm
|
|
|
|
|
I remember it as pretty and green,
cigarette and booze taxes were high! I
also remember that there was one area that
everything was written in french and this
was a long time ago, is it still that way?
|
|
|
|
|
 |
|
goin_crazy
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 18 Apr 2006 Posts: 8 Location: wilmington, ohio
|
Posted: 04-21-06 10:23am
|
|
|
|
|
I am just scared that with all the stress
that my mom is putting on me right now
that I will lose the baby. The only real
reason that I dont want my mom to take
custody of my baby, is because of my step
dad. He is emotionally abusive, and if
thing dont go his way (especially with me)
he gets physical. Like last night he
grabbed my head and pushed me into my
room. While I was babysitting a 3 month
old. I tripped over the diper bag and
almost busted my head on the wall. But
see no one seems to listen to that. They
all say that I am making it up. And if
they do take my baby, and when it is
older, I am scared that he will hit mys
child. If he will push me around, knowing
that I am pregnant, I know that he will
hit my child. I dont want that at all. I
just dont know what to do.
|
|
|
|
|
 |
|
goin_crazy
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 18 Apr 2006 Posts: 8 Location: wilmington, ohio
|
Posted: 04-21-06 13:17pm
|
|
|
|
|
She only cares about him and his money.
She knows exactly what he does and she is
still with him. I know she aint too
scared to leave him, but she just wont do
it. My mom quit talking to my brother
completely, until he had his baby. And
the only reason that she quit talking to
him,was because of her husband. She even
told me like 2 days ago, that her job was
more important than her family. She
doesnt want to spend any time at all with
her family. She dont talk to her mom and
dad, she dont talk to her brother neice
or nephew. She has basically given up on
her family because of her husband.
|
|
|
|
|
 |
|
neeko177
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 16 Feb 2005 Posts: 427
|
Posted: 04-21-06 13:37pm
|
|
|
|
|
Lol yeah we have cold winters..And nice
summers...
Montreal speaks just french.. But other
than that you usually see alot of things
written in both french and english
.E.V.E.R.Y.W.H.E.R.E. Lol.. And yes
cigarette and booze is exspensive! A pack
of brand name players cigarettes is over
$9 canadian here.. I dont know what its
like there...
Anyways... Do you think you could talk to
your mom and explain to her your reason
for not wanting her to take your baby?
And also, what if you have the baby, you
and the baby would be living with your
mother right? You could raise the child
and have your mother there to kinda guide
you and help you with anything you needed
as well as you would be there to address
all your concerns with ur step dad... And
eventually when you and ur child became
older u would move out of that home and
wouldnt have to worry about him
|
|
|
|
|