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Asymmetric (uneven) Face

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japer

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Posted: 09-07-08 23:00pm

i was looking for facial surgeons on the web and made an online consultation in which i left my email. the doc added me to his messenger list and that's pretty much how it went.

in reply to
"sounds like you're going through a difficult time. It's crazy how these odd anomolous adolescent developments can really effect self-esteem. "

yeah, i was (or used to think i was) normal before noticing my assymetry, so it's been like hell for me. like many of u guys, i'm always uncomfortable when talking to people thinking that they might notice the flaw in my bone structure. it's a little paranoic cause probably nobody has noticed yet (if i realized that i had uneven cheekbones after 18 years of looking everyday at myself, maybe it's somehow unnoticeable, who knows).

cheers!
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Biani

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Posted: 09-08-08 12:21pm

:O!!! My pics come out in google??? noooooooooooo.... haha... that IS bad!!! i reluctantly posted them on photobucket and even that was with restrictions.... they could only be accesed by the link. I took them down a while back. Gimlet, would you be so kind as to private message me the link to where my pics show up? Pleeeaseeee!!! hehe... i'm feeling paranoid...
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hpnotiq1

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Posted: 09-11-08 23:58pm

Biani, I also saw pics on google images of someone who looked familiar ... Go to google.com and type in Condylar Hyperplasia then click on Images....

BTW, You don't look bad at all Wink
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BEH3M0TH

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Posted: 09-13-08 16:25pm

wow i just found this forum through google and it seems that most of you feel how i
feel. i started noticing my jaw was uneven back when i was 12 years old. now im 18
and have been paranoid of people noticing my flaws for 6 years. iv even grown my
hair long to hide the left side of my face because it is much wider then my right.
i have been going to an orthognathic surgeon for 2 years now to get this fixd and
have had 1 surgery to widen my top jaw to get ready for my final. but as of today
i went to the surgeon and my previous surgeon just retired and the replacement surgeon said need so much done that he cant do it alone so i have to drive to another
city to get a 2nd opinion. and now the surgeon told me that the surgery wouldnt even
correct my jaw which got me really down. im just hoping the next surgeon will give
me some hope.
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hpnotiq1

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Posted: 09-13-08 21:09pm

Good luck with everything...



Does anyone notice that the affected side seems to grow less hair? I seem to grow less facial here on the affected side...
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beri

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Posted: 09-13-08 21:28pm

I stumbled across this forum today and I can't believe there are so many other people out there that feel the same way I do. I first noticed my facial asymmetries after it was pointed out to me by a less than tactful orthodontist around the age of 18. I went home and studied my face, and after looking in the double mirror, my eyes were opened to ""THE HORROR". It has since been pointed out to me by others including makeup artists (one asked me if I had ever suffered an injury to one side of my face and acted incredulous when I said no, another said it was difficult to do my makeup because the two sides of my face are so different). I’ve since realized that it's been that way ever since I was a young child, perhaps even since birth, although it seems to have gotten more severe as I aged. I'm 31 now, and since that day, I’ve experienced many forms of self loathing, but I've come to accept that this is how I look, and I’m even happy with myself on most days. Like many of you, I've been told numerous times that I'm attractive. I’m married and my husband loves the way I look. Most of the time I see myself as normal, but in certain pictures and the dreaded double mirror, I can easily see that my face is very asymmetrical. My nose is skewed WAY to the left, and the left and right sides of my face are very different. My smile is also crooked. I wasn’t able to see many of the photos in this forum because they have already been removed, but based on the ones I did see I think my face is VERY asymmetrical compared to most. The thing is, I’ve come to notice that most people’s faces are asymmetrical to varying degrees, and it doesn’t detract from their appearance. I still have my bad days where I worry about how other people see me and wish that my face were more symmetrical, but I realize that people’s opinion of me is based on many, many factors. If someone doesn’t like me because my face is crooked, then it’s really an issue of theirs and not mine. Now my personality… that’s another matter but I won’t go into that here. Smile
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nightangel73

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Posted: 09-13-08 22:55pm

In 35 years of life that I have I have only seeing one person with an assymetrical face and the rest are injuries. The lady has half her face severely disfigured by a huge birth mole that can't be removed. After seeing that I don't think anyone here could possibly think of their faces to be assymetrical. If you are expecting to have perfect dimensions of your face well no one has them. It is natural for face to not have perfectly even dimension. My face is not perfectly assymetrical and so what. I don't care and no one cares. As you age and you see continued change that self conciousness of uneven face will fade away. Wrinkles will come, gray hair will grow so you will have to live with accepting you gonna look old and not pretty eventually and nothing you can do about it unless you are very wealthy and can afford all kinds of cosmetic procedures. Particulary with wrinkles as this will make your face look bad. You will forget uneveness in a heartbeat and focus on how to get rid of them hehe.
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japer

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Posted: 09-13-08 23:20pm

It's not something people like us can forget about that easily. I mean, there are few days in which i don't think about my facial asymmetry that much. But as soon as i see my face in a mirror i realize that my face is not normal.
I know that 99% of the people doesn't have perfect facial symmetry, but there comes a point when the asymmetry is so severe that there's no way to accept it as normal.

I've also been told several times that i'm attractive, and that's because my asymmetry is not noticeable at a simple glance, but i'm sure that if somebody looked at a frontal view photo (like the one in the passport o the id) my uneven face would be revealed.

Yeah, it's easy to say "accept yourself", "who cares what other people tihnk", but how can i except to find a long term girlfriend if after a few dates she will notice that she's dating someone with two different faces? how can i expect to find happiness that way?

i know looks are not the only thing that matters, but it sure matters a lot.
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nightangel73

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Posted: 09-14-08 00:06am

japer wrote:
It's not something people like us can forget about that easily. I mean, there are few days in which i don't think about my facial asymmetry that much. But as soon as i see my face in a mirror i realize that my face is not normal.
I know that 99% of the people doesn't have perfect facial symmetry, but there comes a point when the asymmetry is so severe that there's no way to accept it as normal.

I've also been told several times that i'm attractive, and that's because my asymmetry is not noticeable at a simple glance, but i'm sure that if somebody looked at a frontal view photo (like the one in the passport o the id) my uneven face would be revealed.

Yeah, it's easy to say "accept yourself", "who cares what other people tihnk", but how can i except to find a long term girlfriend if after a few dates she will notice that she's dating someone with two different faces? how can i expect to find happiness that way?

i know looks are not the only thing that matters, but it sure matters a lot.


If you have been told that you are attractive I do not understand why you even care about your uneven face. You will absolutetly have no problems with your gf noticing your face is not even. I had a bf with uneven face (very attractive) that I couldn't point in the begining his face assymetrical until he showed me one time with his sunglasses that his face was indeed assymetrical. It didn't do me a synch. I did broke up with the guy but not because of the assymetrical face but because of personality reasons were we had conflict. And don't take offense for this but I can tell you that a guy being so concerned about uneven face is very unatractive, I wouldn't date you. We women like men who are SELF CONFIDENT, that no matter they don't look perfect they think they are good enough. That is attraciveness and in time you will learn this well. You still have no clue what love is about and you will learn that in time too.
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cloudstrife06

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Posted: 09-14-08 13:02pm

lol wow. the thread i started by answering one guy's question has spanned 2 yrs.

since then, i continued sleeping on the other side of my face and also applied pressure manually during the day. now the cheeks are about the same! Very
Happy

the jaw/chin area is a bit tough to correct. it just gives you a bad neck injury if you try to put enough pressure. plus, bone remodels itself if you don't have a continuous and significant amount of pressure applied. (that's why teeth move back if braces aren't kept for awhile even if they're already aligned).

the asymmetry has gone down a lot frontally. it is almost gone now. (facial contour). the last piece i'm looking at is the lower jaw area. one side is thicker. i have checked with several surgeons and they can do a jaw shave/contouring to make both the jawline smoother.

does anyone have any good suggestions on surgeons who do facial contouring procedures? i know edmund kwan in nyc does it and he seems to have a prestigious background. however, i've heard some unfavorable reviews in forums where he does what he thinks is right, not what you want.

the best i've heard is BK Clinic in Korea, known for working on their celebs. korea & japan are known for the highest quality plastic surgery. but...how will i get there?
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dark90

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hi all
Posted: 09-14-08 16:01pm

I am 18 old male, and i havent noticed my asymmetry until 16, probably due to a fact that i didnt payed much attention looking myself and didnt have any camera.
At first i noticed just look weird on photos, then that my jaw was just a little to the right, so i tried holding my jaw to the left. Then i realised that right side of my jaw was overdeveloped, or other was underdeveloped. I tried puting my beard on flat surfaces but i couldnt put it right but with a quite a degrees to the left. I was taking some photos (with the mobile, even now i dont have anything better) and watching it reversed in mirror. I was so horrified, it looked like my whole face was deformed. I was in a mall once tring some clothes, in the cabin there were two mirrors on 90 degrees to each other. When i saw my reflection it was like looking an ogre. I feel so bad.
And it affects my mouth, they are beeing pulled by jaw.
The jaw isnt everything i am afraid, i am having the same problem as most people here, but ony one mentioned thing about hair. At first i thought that i was loosing my hair, and it wasnt so scary for my cause my dad is bald so i knew what to espect. But the thing is i am (mostly) loosing it (if i am loosing it at all, or is it just face deformation) on the right side of my face, and thats tough, i can never make it look normal. For a while i even shaved a part of my left side. I would shave it every day, but i think still you can see. Anyway i was in a such bad mood that i shaved my entire head with a razor blade. It didnt helpt, it still looked very weird apart from that that without it my bold head look scary. Now its grown back and it looks worse than before.
Apart from that my whole face looks deformed but i think that thoose things are worst.

People maybe dont notice the jaw (but surely hair), or they simply dont want to be rude. Whatever, even if they dont know about jaw asimmetry i am sure that my face looks weird to them.
I tried speaking to my mother, but she said that there is nothing there, but when i showed her precisely she said, oh yes i see, but i wouldnt noticed if you havent told me. Anyway not much help from her when i said that i want to be looked by a doctor.

I was thinking what my caused this. I rememberd that i was hit hard in right part of my jaw few years ago, but then when i look at photoes when i was younger i see the deformation, but not as obvius as now. Maybe genetics? Dont know, havent noticed on anyone in my family. Maybe depression? And the last thing that i can think about is teeth. My family almost never goes to the dentist. Yeah, i know...
So i remeber going only few, or several times when i was child. And once again half a year ago. The stupid thing is that i wanted to go to the dentist, even when i was a child, but my mother didnt find it necessery. I have got bad teeth, maybe not to much in wrong direction, but still bad. But it didnt caused me any pain.
Maybe that is the reason, or all things combined.

I hate it, its seems to be worse every day. I allways hide my feelings and try to look selfconfident, but i am very sad. Its not that i care for my looks that much, i have good friends, but the thing is when it comes to girls, zero. My face features are already lets just say not nice, and with this asymmetry...

I have read whole topic, but i am not native english speaker, can anyone summarise what types of deformations can be, what could coused it, who to talk to (i mean doctors) and ways of treatments if there are any (i sure hope there are:( ), for everyone, and me if possible?.
Anyway for my situation no money allowed:(, barely living like this. If the surgery is only way, better start playing lottery:).

Its somewhat easyer knowing that i am not the only one, i presumed that other people may have similar problems, but i have been avoiding searching about it...
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gimlet

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Posted: 09-14-08 17:30pm

hypnotiq - being female, I can't speak to facial hair, but I do notice that I gain less weight on the affected side. Maybe the same thing that causes the asymmetry causes development in general, including facial hair?

Beri You sound like you could be my twin! Although my asymmetry developed as a teenager. My entire right side of my face is under developed (and body, too), and I feel, looks quite different than the left. And I've always gotten the sense that my right side has an injured look too, which lends an air of ill-health to my overall face. It's nice to hear that some peace can and does come at some point, and I'm glad to hear that you have such a supportive husband!

Japer

I totally understand why you want surgery, because it will help you feel more self-confidence, and that's great, if it's not risky, extreme or going to bankrupt you, then it can't hurt, but don't put all your eggs in one basket of perfection and expect your life to change hugely post-surgery. It probably won't. You need to develop yourself as a person, too.


As a female, I can tell you that a crooked face would never prevent me from dating someone. It wouldn't even stop me from lusting over them. And I think most women feel this way. It's true that self-confidence and a strong sense of self go a long way, more than a crooked or straight face (Owen Wilson is a good example that Kiarra brought. Guy is hot,hot,hot, but has a jacked up face! lol.).

I think my face is probably a thousand times more crooked than yours, yet I've had a boyfriend (one who was damned cute, too) and other potential guys, too. My ex-boyfriend (and other love interests) never once told me I was pretty - because I'm not - but told me that I was cute/adorable, a reference to my personality more than my face. We got together because we clicked on an intellectual level. You're more likely to get a long-term girlfriend by developing yourself as a person than by undergoing surgery to correct the asymmetry in your cheekbone, especially as you get older.

It's also worth nothing that asymmetry won't destroy your serious relationships, but a lack of self-confidence will - especially if your ability to be happy rests solely on her. Girls, like guys, want a partner who can give equally to a relationship, not someone they feel depends on them. Not to mention the fact that low self esteem can really affect your ability to relate fully and emotionally with your partners, because it's so hard to open yourself up to them.

In terms of aesthetics, what's important is not the asymmetry, but the construction of your overall face. Sometimes a bit of asymmetry can be cute. don't sweat it. If people tell you you're attractive, it means that your face is well-constructed and that the asymmetry doesn't detract from your face at all. If you want to post or PM A picture, I could give you an honest assessment of whether a stranger notices your asymmetry and whether it's enough to detract from how you look.

Trust me when I say that I know how you feel. I've struggled with image issues from about 13 onward. I receive far more negative comments about how I look than positive ones (very, very few positive ones), which was a huge blow to me, because I was a cute kid. I ended up with some nice features, but an odd arrangement of my face, which the asymmetry exacerbates. There are some days where I have difficulty even facing the world (I still face it). So, trust me when I say that if people thought you looked like crap, they would tell you or not say anything at all. If people tell you you're good looking, they mean it! They're not just trying to make you feel better.

Either way, good looking or not, you need to work on yourself and learn to love yourself, good and bad, flawed and not flawed, before you can hope to be happy. A good relationship will emerge from being happy, not the other way around.
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japer

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Posted: 09-14-08 19:36pm

dark90

the only solutions for misaligned jaws involve orthodontists and treatments with braces and surgery, which costs quite a bit.

gimlet and nightangel

thanks for your words, but now i'm confused as hell. i was already decided on gettin surgery, but know i'm having second thoughts.

i dont want to post any pics cause they'll end up all over the internet like that girl Biani, but there's a famous tennis player (spaniard tommy robredo) with the same problem

http://www.atptennis .com/3/en/players/playerprofiles/default.a sp?playersearch=robredo

imagine that but with more prominent cheekbones. well, i mean, i'm not comparing myself with robredo, just the cheekbones (he's supposed to be pretty goodlooking, i mean, he was an underwear model).

about the positive comments, trying to think about it, i havent got any compliments about my looks in a while. i USED TO get them when i was at school. i've always had the asymmetry, but i think its gotten worse with the years. maybe thats the reason...

anyway, thanks again for your kind words (well, nightangel's words werent so kind..., but thanks). i'm gonna try and learn to live with this condition, beginning with my selfconfidence. i know its gonna be hard but hey, life's supposed to be that way.
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gimlet

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Posted: 09-15-08 00:54am

dark90 -
If it's been present since childhood, then it might be genetic. If other people in your family don't have the same thing then maybe it's a mild form of hemifacial microsomia which is anomaly that occurs in the womb when one side of the face doesn't develop fully. That's kind of what my face looks like, though my asymmetry is in my ribs too, and developed when I was a teen, it wasn't present at birth.

it's hard to know. The best thing to do is to speak to a maxillofacial surgeon or an orthodontist... they might be able to help you identify the source of the problem and appropriate treatments. You might need surgery, you might just need braces to reposition your bite. Even if you don't have money now, you might have it later and you might be able to fix it. Depending on what country you live in, treatment may even be covered by your government, if it's causing you pain (although it doesn't sound like it is).


japer If ever you do decide to go through with cosmetic treatments, you may want to consider counseling first. They might be able to help you develop your self-confidence and subsequently decide whether you actually want/need it. They can also help you to develop realistic expectations of outcomes. It might also be helpful in dealing with post-surgery issues like depression (common with cosmetic surgery), should you actually decide to go through with it. In fact, a counselor might be helpful for your self-esteem even if you decide not to do surgery!

If you don't want to post pics, you can always send them by private message.

That guy's asymmetry isn't noticeable at all. I can see a difference in his eye, but I question whether or not cheek reduction would resolve it, since it looks like his orbital might be asymmetrical (his eyebrow looks lower and his eye looks smaller). I could be wrong, I'm certainly no specialist. Either way, he's not made unattractive by his asymmetry. It doesn't lend a air of weirdness to his face at all.

And yeah, definitely lighten up on yourself. Don't overthink people's reactions either, it's a losing proposition, unless they've made very clear that they think you look like crap. Not mentioning your face is not necessarily a result of thinking you look like an ogre.

I bet there's some girl out there who has a massive crush on your but who hasn't approached you because she has her own insecurities about her butt, or her crooked cheekbone, or whatever. ;o) Something worth thinking about! Glad to hear that you're going to work on your self-confidence, though! Your looks will fade, surgery or not, but your confidence will stay with you forever and make you forever attractive!
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beri

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Posted: 09-15-08 16:29pm

gimlet – Like you, my asymmetry also extends to the rest of my body. My whole right side is slightly larger than the left. I don't think it's noticeable except in a few areas. I don't know why that would happen - whether it's a genetic thing or something that happened in the womb or after birth. I usually sleep on my right side so it's possible that could have caused the flatness to my face on that side, except it doesn't explain how the rest of my right side is also larger. Someone posted a link to a congenital disorder that sometimes occurs where one side of the fetus gets more blood flow than the other and grows larger. I guess it could be something like that. You seem to have a pretty healthy attitude about the whole thing, that's cool. You seem like a very nice person.

japer - I agree with gimlet’s advice. Develop yourself as a person, get your self-confidence up, and you probably won’t even care about getting the surgery. I used to have horrible self esteem and fantasize about all the different surgeries that I would get if I had the money. I know now that no surgery would have fixed the underlying issue of disliking myself. I have pretty good self esteem now, and I don’t want surgery anymore.
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nightangel73

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Posted: 09-15-08 20:05pm

I think that Robredo's cheekbones are perfect. No assimetry whatsoever. That guy is hot!!

Japer sorry I came across a little harsh..
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Biani

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Posted: 09-15-08 23:04pm

Wow! there have been a lot of posts since i last checked!

hpnotiq1, thanks... i have been checking on google by typing that, and my pics still show up. It bothers me most that it's the second and third pic! Why can't they show up, say, in page 15 of the whole thing? damn my luck! haha. I hope I HOPE they stop showing soon...

I saw the pic of the tennis player, and all it looks like to me is as if he's got his head slightly to his left, and that one eye looks bigger than the other, but, well, that can happen to anyone with the camera's flash, haha.

On being self concious... i'm beginning to think we do make it into a huge deal when maybe it's not that bad? I was freaking out about how on earth i was going to get close to a guy, ever!... afraid he'll notice i'm an asymmetric freak... But i've been dating a guy (a very cute one) and he seems to think i'm beautiful. He tells me all the time while staring at my face, and i don't think he's lying, haha.

About the hair thing... i hadn't really thought about it being related, but as a matter of fact, i do have less hair on my left side. My hairline is really bad, i have a lot of "baby hairs" or whatever they're called, really short-fine hair that never grows, well, it's far more scarce on my left. Also, i know i'm a girl and i shouldn't have facial hair, but i do have to take care of my whiskers, lol, and i do have a lil' bit more unwanted facial hair on my right than on my left. Since my jaw deviates to my left... and they say that the deviation is always towards the affected side... Mh? coincidence?? Maybe not!
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po

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Posted: 09-28-08 16:24pm

Most of you guys have BDD. I have it too. You should seriously seek out a psychiatrist who specializes in BDD, especially before you undergo any cosmetic surgery procedrures.
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hpnotiq1

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Posted: 09-30-08 14:26pm

BDD? I doubt most of us have that... When you feel a physical difference in your face, it's not psychological...
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gimlet

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Posted: 10-03-08 09:49am

BDD is only diagnosed in people who obsess over imagined defects. Most of us don't have imagined defects - they are clearly there and are often seen and pointed out by other people. What people here tend to do, myself included, is blow them out of proportion in our own minds, which is unhealthy, but a very far cry from body dysmorphic disorder.

My doctor first pointed out my crooked nose and my ortho's receptionist mentioned, unsolicited, that my jaw pulls to the right when I speak. Most people agree that they can see the differences that i point out, so it's not BDD.

Most other people here have similar experiences.
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