Joined: 17 Jan 2006 Posts: 5041 Location: to hell with this crap
Are There Such Things As Coincidences? Posted: 04-13-06 14:15pm
I know most of you are tired of hearing
about this but I am having a hard time
coping with it.
My first baby was born on april 15th,
2004. He was 1lb and 5oz. His apgars
were 5 @ one min and 7 @ five mins.
However his little heart was not right.
He had hypoplastic left heart syndrome and
was just too small for surgery. Hunter
passed away on the evening of april 17th,
2004. I was 24.4 weeks along.
Now for the coincidenceses:
lmp for both pregnancies was novemver 12th
my origional edd was august 19 for both
babies
his date of delivery was changed to
auguest 2nd and amelia's due date was
changed to august 7th.
My little girl is doing wonderfully, but
somehow I keep thinking that somehow the
coincidences will take her away from me
too. Does that make since? With my
first pregnancy I never thought in my life
that this would happen to me. There was
no fear that I would loose him. I am
really stressed right now because his
birthday is coming up in a few days, and I
am really scared that I will loose her
too, eventhough the u/s states otherwise.
I feel her move, but then again hunter
moved all the time too, but he wasn't
perfect.
How do I cope? It's just very hard right
now. I just needed to get this off my
chest. I dont' want to burden everyone
with my woes. But thanks for
listening.
Genipher
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Lalee
Active User, Really EHEALTHy
Joined: 26 Jan 2006 Posts: 991 Location: South Carolina
Posted: 04-13-06 14:21pm
Maybe this is your way of getting a little
bit of .Hunter back? Coincidences don't
have to be bad... And they shouldn't
be.
You've gone thorugh something terrible,
losing a child, and I can't imagine what
that's like... But maybe this will be
your miracle baby. Maybe she's meant to
come into your life and bring you some
sort of peace. Look at it as .Hunter's
second chance, not another heartache.
Also, the odds of all these things being
in common .A.N.D something bad happening
both times are really, really, really
low.
Hang in there... For baby's sake... And
you are entitled to bring up your concerns
as often as you'd like. I'll listen, at
least!
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HcoBrunette06
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 06 Dec 2005 Posts: 8005 Location: Missouri, United States
Thanks: 2
Thanked:1
Posted: 04-13-06 14:24pm
You know that everyone here is here to
support you, you don't have to worry about
people getting tired of hearing about it.
We understand you're going through a hard
time still, and none of us really expect
you to be over this yet.
I don't know what to tell you because i've
never been in the situation of losing a
child obviously, but I really hope
everythings good with your baby girl :)
which im sure it is. You have every
reason to be scared, I probably would be
too if I was in your situation just
because losing a child is very scary im
sure. Just be careful, im sure
everything'll be great :)
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Sunflower_pie81
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 17 Jan 2006 Posts: 5041 Location: to hell with this crap
Posted: 04-14-06 08:16am
Thanks guys,
it's just very hard right now because the
babies would have been pretty much almost
2 years. But I am trying not to stress
over it because the baby in my stomach is
apparently ment to be here and I thanks
god for that every day. I just think
that I may loose her like I did with
hunter.
Moving on....Amelia is a blessing from
.God and I couldn't be happier with her.
I will tell you that .God gave me another
chance to have a baby. Please, I am not
another fat family, but I think that
because I only have 7% of one and 15% of
my overies and I was told that it wouldn't
be easy to get pregnant. But I am
pregnant and I wouldn't change it for the
world. I just wish I didnt' have this
black cloud weighing on my mind all the
time. You know?
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Melissa_20
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 18 Jan 2006 Posts: 6806 Location: Florida
Posted: 04-14-06 11:06am
Like the pple above me said,we know you
cant help but think about something bad
happening but you should look at it like a
second chance. Just tell amelia everday
she will make it and tell her what you
will do together when she is born and when
she gets older!
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tigresacanela24
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 11 Nov 2005 Posts: 5261 Location: Treat your children well, eventually they'll choose your nursing home.
Posted: 04-15-06 20:33pm
Don't worry .Gen. Everything is going to
be fine with .Amelia. It is only natural
for you to worry since you lost .Hunter.
But everything is coming up fine with
.Amelia's tests. I pray for you every
night when I say my prayers. You just
have to have faith that everything will
turn out okay. And don't worry so much,
you want .Amelia to have a stress free
environment. :lol:
how's the nursery coming along?
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OaTmEaLfAiRy
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 13 Oct 2005 Posts: 192 Location: Iowa
Coincidences? Posted: 04-16-06 17:51pm
I don't think they were coincidences at
all. It sounds like god's way of saying,
"i know I took your baby away, and nothing
can fill that void, but i'm going to give
you a second chance." I know it's not the
same, but have faith and it will be almost
enough.
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fatfamily02
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 20 Jul 2005 Posts: 3050 Location: Georgia, USA
Re: Coincidences? Posted: 04-16-06 18:18pm
oatmealfairy
wrote:
i don't think they were
coincidences at all. It sounds like
god's way of saying, "i know I took your
baby away, and nothing can fill that void,
but i'm going to give you a second
chance." I know it's not the same, but
have faith and it will be almost
enough.
.God did not take her baby. He may allow
the enemy to do things to us---but .He
does not give us grief. Maybe we should
all read job. Satan came before .Jesus
asking permission to cause job pain and
grief. .God 'allowed' him to do it.
No offense--but I dont like when pple say
".God took anything from us."
he says "i know my thoughts for you,
thoughts of good and not of evil."
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Melissa_20
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 18 Jan 2006 Posts: 6806 Location: Florida
Re: Coincidences? Posted: 04-17-06 07:42am
fatfamily02
wrote:
.God did not take her baby.
He may allow the enemy to do things to
us---but .He does not give us grief.
Maybe we should all read job. Satan
came before .Jesus asking permission to
cause job pain and grief. .God
'allowed' him to do it.
No offense--but I dont like when pple say
".God took anything from us."
he says "i know my thoughts for you,
thoughts of good and not of
evil."
just b/c they said he took the baby does
not mean it was in a bad way.God may have
'took' .Hunter for a good reason.Maybe
there would have been something that
happened in his life that would be hard
for sunflower(sry,i don't know ur name
:oops: ) or something else,you never
know.Everything happens for a reason and I
agree with oatmealfairy
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Sunflower_pie81
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 17 Jan 2006 Posts: 5041 Location: to hell with this crap
Posted: 04-17-06 07:57am
I went and saw my baby on saturday and he
is now two years old. I am glad that I
was able to get a chance to go see him, I
dont' like the idea of him being alone on
his birthday. (i know that he isn't
alone but it makes me feel better.) I keep
thinking of him as a helpless little baby
hooked up on the ventalaters and all the
wires hooked up to his little body. I
know that he is in a better place.
I do agree with the others, god may not
have taken him away from me, but he did
take him to a place where he wouldn't be
in anymore pain. He would have lived in
pain for the rest of his life if he stayed
alive. God did kinda in a way take him
and put him somewhere he is very well
taken care of.
Thanks for all your responces,
kay, thanks for your prayers, and the
nursery is coming along beautiful. I
need to put a second coat on the changing
table but it looks good. My husband put
the first one on last week. But we
still need a lot of stuff. I had to pay
a lot of taxes this week so I won't really
be gettng much stuff this week. But it's
coming along. Thanks
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Melissa_20
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 18 Jan 2006 Posts: 6806 Location: Florida
Posted: 04-17-06 08:51am
Aww,thats soo sweet you went to go see him
on his birthday! Amelia will be lucky to
have a mommy like you!
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Sunflower_pie81
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 17 Jan 2006 Posts: 5041 Location: to hell with this crap
Posted: 04-17-06 08:55am
melissa_20
wrote:
aww,thats soo sweet you went
to go see him on his birthday! Amelia
will be lucky to have a mommy like
you!
thanks hun, I love her more than life it's
self right now. I can't wait to have her
and hold her and give her everything I am
capable of giving her. She is the light
of my life right now.
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tigresacanela24
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 11 Nov 2005 Posts: 5261 Location: Treat your children well, eventually they'll choose your nursing home.
Posted: 04-17-06 09:22am
Be happy .Gen! Amelia is going to be
fine :lol:
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Sunflower_pie81
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 17 Jan 2006 Posts: 5041 Location: to hell with this crap
Posted: 04-17-06 09:28am
tigresacanela24
wrote:
be happy .Gen! Amelia is
going to be fine
:lol:
i know, thanks .Kay
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OaTmEaLfAiRy
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 13 Oct 2005 Posts: 192 Location: Iowa
Posted: 04-21-06 18:06pm
In my religion, we believe that we are put
on earth to be tested and to gain a body
to use up in heaven.
If a baby dies young (or in-utero) it's
because they were valiant in a past life
and didn't need to be tested anymore.
They were only put here to gain a body.
So I do believe god took hunter. But not
to cause grief. This was part of the plan
all along. God gave hunter to someone he
knew was strong enough to handle the loss.
Then he gave hunter the chance to get a
body (by being conceived) and then "took"
hunter back up to heaven.
So, I guess fatfamily. I do believe god
took hunter, no matter what you say. I,
however, have less faith in your claims so
far. Shouldn't you have had your babies
by now?
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sandyallen
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 02 Feb 2004 Posts: 4580
Posted: 04-21-06 19:20pm
I am truly sorry for your loss and just
know that .Hunter is isn a better place
even though it is very difficult to let
go, I had to let go a few times too, twice
and possibly three times I did kind of
understand, even thogh it was still hard,
their are times we never know why.
I was told when my .Mom passed away and I
was young the and my .Grandmother passed
away and I was older then, why couldn't
they take these bad people instead and
they told me that they have to average it
out up there, the good with the bad which
I guess makes since, in a way.
Your son is a guardiaan angel watching
over you wnating you to move on but not
wanting to be forgotten , just like mine
that did not make it!
We are here for you!
Please be positive, I realize that it is
difficullt at times, thei are times that
you can have two children and one is
really a brain is pretty or handsome and
has it all and the other can have a lot of
health problems and can be slow and have
other problems, this happens a lot!
The very best to you and yours!