I can't speak from personal experience, but I can relate to you based on others I have talked to and discussed the problem with.
Overall, physical and mental abusive people don't change unless they get treatment for their sickness. Yes, it is a sickness. It is a thing of control. If they feel they are in control, things go fairly well and the vicitm thinks that everything is fine, until that something sets them off (losing that control feeling). It could be as simple as another man talking to you very innocently, you wanting to do something without his presence like shopping, visit relatives who can influence you in any way. Anything that will cause him to lose his control.
The abusive one takes his postion of I need to cause pain, hurt, damage, or even wound to gain that control again.
Fear in the victim is what keeps them in the relationship. Fear for their lives, children, family, etc. Stuck.
The abusive one can get help, if they really want to. Therapy is not a short process, it can take years before they can see the necessity to change and what needs to be done to change. At least he realizes he has a problem, but it is up to him to do something about it. Even if he does, it would be years before you could make a go of it again.
My heart goes out to you. I hope things work out for you and your child, but don't acccept him back unless he has had professional help, for all your safety.
