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43 With a Much Younger Boyfriend, Could This Be Premen.

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I am 43 years old and I think I am going through a lot of changes. I first started wanting to go to clubs and just doing things that I know if I don't do now, I will soon be too old to do. I started flirting with younger guys. I have been with 3 much younger guys.....20, 28 and 31 until my last one came along which has moved in with me now. He is 21 years old. My son is 2 years younger than him. Both of my children like him and everyone gets along fine. We have a really good relationship and I love him to death but sometimes I feel like a pervert. When I am with him, I feel normal, I don't think about my age we just have fun together but when i'm alone I start thinking about the way it looks to others and it really seems wierd. Could this be a premenopause symtom or maybe just some kind of emotional problem know that I am getting older. I still look young everyone thinks i'm around 32 or so but I know that it won't be long before i'll start showing my age and I want to have all the fun now while I can. I'm not interested in anyone my age. If I was, I wouldn't worry as much about showing my age.
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replied September 24th, 2005
Me to
I can understand that, I am also with a younger man, and I also think about these things when I am alone. People have said to me that I am with someone younger because I refuse to grow old. Sorry I have not been much help, but if you are happy then try not to worry too much at least your family have accepted him, mine have not.
Hugs
juju :roll:
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replied January 8th, 2006
I think age differences (as long as some adult isn't with a child!!!) should be a non issue. My bf is 22 years younger than me -- so what? It all depends on how one thinks and acts. Some men my age act as immature as 12-year-olds and some 20-year-old men are mature, fun, all that good stuff. You just can't judge whether or not people are good for each other by how old or young they are.

If two people get along, enjoy being together and are in love or even just good friends, more power to them! Compatibility is the issue, not age! Plus, it's nobody else's damn business.
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Users who thank Dark_Allies for this post: Mikej832 

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replied September 2nd, 2009
younger married boyfriend
also with a guy 10 years younger Smile, big but though, he is my boss, very influential where i live and married, He has a very strong hold on me, i have now been with him 8 years and our love is really strong.
i'm fine with the situation as it is, but he now wants to leave his wife, and that I cannot do. loads of reasons, main one being that he has a family with her!!! and he says he doesn't love her, but i know he does, in a different way that he does me.

i won't leave a job that support me, so how can i break it off? i do love him.
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replied September 12th, 2009
I am still with my boyfriend, ever since 1997 and it is late into 2009 now. If other people can't, don't or won't understand something like that, then it is really more their problem than mine. It also means they just haven't been lucky enough to have a relationship that strong and deep. If they had ever found a love like that, then they wouldn't be so disapproving or assume you are suffering from some psychological flaw. If you are happy and your boyfriend is happy, just enjoy your life together. There's nothing wrong with you OR your age difference.
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replied October 25th, 2009
Much young boyfriend
I had a sex first time when I was 16. My boyfriend was 14. After him, in age of 17-19 I was in love with 2, 3 years younger boys so I have accustomed to younger boyfriends.
Now I'm 42 and my current boyfriend is 19. It's third serious love in my life. First was when I was 30, I was in reliatonship with six years younger guy, it lasted two years. Second serious love was when I was 35, he was twelve years younger, it lasts one and half year. And now, I'm with my boyfriend since August.
Ending, I had thirty-eight sex partners with my life and only one of them was older (I was 29, he was 32.) Sorry for my English, but I`m Pole.
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replied May 25th, 2010
I am still happy with my 23 years younger boyfriend Smile
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replied June 14th, 2010
i think it's not a premenopause syndrome, it's just you want to try other things that you never tried before.
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replied June 14th, 2010
Community Volunteer
Hi onlinemaca and welcome to ehealth: One cannot buy the inner confidence of a woman...Once she finds it she gloats with who she is and what she is capable of being...She feels this new woman who has grown and age has no number...I love your answer...If you didn't find it the first time around, then go for it girl....And believe me, I smile as I write this...Take care.....

Caroline
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replied September 15th, 2010
getting older with a younger man
found this cos i was thinking the same thing.
im 40 in december my bf will be 21 in january, we have been together 2 years, seeing each other every couple of months as he is in a different country and in the army. i have always put off any kind of future with him, and i always said, well huni if u still feel this way after the army at 21 then i think ur grown up enuf to know for sure that im the right one.... he is so looking forward to moving in with me in 9 months and leaving the army and his country, and now i find myself panicking about the age, although it dones not matter to him. both our families have been great, better than any family of an ex, so why am i full of doubt all the time.. maybe i just cant believe that the man of my dreams is almost half my age... its so awkward, i dont know if i even explained what i wasnted towhen i started writing this lol... well nvm Smile
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replied October 13th, 2011
I love My 20yr Older LiL Lady
I am 29 and my wife to be is turning 49, we have been together for 4yrs now and have relocated from one state to another which was the best thing for us because our friends from our old state didnt really except us as a couple. When we met we thought we were closer in age (alot closer then 20 yrs LOL) but She to me is the most beautiful woman I have ever had and she has made me happier then anyone I've been with. True Love doesn't care about anything but itself and I love this woman for who she is on the inside which wont change with age. I know soon she will start to look older but im so in love with her I don't care. 2morrow is not promised so I decided I want to spend the rest of my life with her. We have our issues but we have overcome things (Cancer) married couples for 20yrs couldnt go through 2gether. And I still Love her 2 death Hope this helps someone else 2 stay strong
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replied January 19th, 2012
Doubts about age gap
I have a much younger boyfriend - he is 28 and I am 49. He thinks I am 40-something but younger than 49 as I look much younger. I am dreading the time when he will find out my true age and I feel I am living on borrowed time. We have been together for just over 3 months and it is not easy to be honest as I feel quite anxious about the impossibility of it all and end up coming across as too intense, which scares him... He is fairly inexperienced; although he has had other girlfriends in the past there haven't been that many. I told him that I am worried about falling in love with him and need a lot of reassurance which is more true than he can guess. There is also quite a bit of financial disparity as I am a professional woman with a rather good income and this makes him feel inadequate at times. There has been a lot of game playing generated by our mostly unspoken insecurities but we are now trying to make adjustments. There are genuine feelings I think and sexual chemistry, but some fundamental incompatibility that may or not be related to the age difference. I wonder if all other relationships with big age gaps have had a difficult phase past the initial couple of months of thrill? How do people relax and just enjoy their relationship, is it mostly because the woman is secure, the man is secure or both?
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replied February 13th, 2012
older woman young boyfriend
oh my gosh i can not believe how many other people are in this situation. I am 37 and am dating a 23 year old. I have never in my life felt such intense feelings, but i am scared as hell. can this work is there a future? he is my kids age almost for goodness sakes...
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replied February 23rd, 2012
My BF is 35 and I am 49. We have been together for 1.5 years. He loves me and I love him however the statistics on this kind of relationship are the worst of all. I am very educated and he is not. I think the truth is that if you are a balanced person then you probably would not be with someone with such an age difference. (yes this includes me) People often think they look much younger but actually look close to their age. I WANT to believe I look young and people SAY i look young but STILL we need to be realistic. If age made no difference then why do most of these people in these posts mention how youthful they look? Let's face it being with a handsome younger man does help to validate me as desireable(in my head) In the end though it is unlikely that I will end up staying with this man. Relationships are difficult enough without the stress of this large gap in age.
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replied July 30th, 2012
He is much younger than me but i love him
Dear All
I am so glad there are others like me. I am 47 and in love with the nicest 27 year old man ever. He is good looking, has the best body I have ever seen and perhaps the best mind and heart. I cherish his love but all the time feel conscious of the age difference. I have tried to walk out of our 2 year old relationship but have realised I cannot live without him. He works in the same organisation where I am a senior management official. He is brilliant at his work and I forcing him to leave this organisation and go for a career enhancing course. I adore him and thanks guys for letting me feel I am okay
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replied November 22nd, 2012
i have always looked younger than my age and now that i am 32 ppl say i look no more than in my early 20s ...as a result i have mostly attracted younger guys in my life.yet it is not until recently that i have started to feel attracted towards guys who are almost 8 to 10 yrs younger than myself ..even more.. (previously it would be only 2 to 5 yrs younger). i dont know why this is...the thought of an older guy than myself doesnt appeal to me at all.
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replied January 31st, 2013
I was 30 when i started dating my 21yr old boyfriend, there is only a 9 year gap between us. i am now 42 and he is 33 and we are still going strong.
Age is just a number and if your happy with your younger man then who cares what anyone else thinks, we only have one life so live it to the max.
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