My Brother And Boyfriend Want to Kill Each Other! Posted: 04-02-06 18:45pm
Ok. I need some help on a situation.
I've been seeing a guy for nearly two
years and although we've been through hell
and high water, somehow we managed to come
through it because of our love for each
other. We're the closest people in the
world to each other.However...
.Last week we had an arguement (as usual),
which got out of hand (as usual). He has
never hit me but in the past (with a fair
amount of provokation on my part) he has
pushed me around. Anyway, he ended up
kicking down my front door in a moment of
rage and after much emotion and
explanation and apology to my mom (her
house) the situation died down. We
decided to take an indefinite break and
just be friends.
A couple of days ago my brother found out
what he did to the door and went mad. We
had a meeting at my house with both sides
of the family in order to sort things out
rationally and calmly. When my brother
arrived everything escalated and to cut a
long story short he took my byf outside to
chat and ended up attacking him with about
ten other guys. Thankfully my byf wasn't
hurt - I got in the way before anyone
could be seriously hurt. Now though i'm
stuck in the middle. I feel betrayed by
my family for turning on me and I love my
byf but he's scared to speak to me since
my bro said that he'd kill him if we had
contact. I feel really lonely and
depressed without him and he wants me to
tell my brother that i'm going to carry on
contacting him even though I know that
this whole situation was caused by me.
What am I supposed to do?
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sandyallen
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 02 Feb 2004 Posts: 4580
Posted: 04-02-06 19:07pm
Just be careful, if he hit you and
physically abused you, he might do it
again. Do not do nothing to start it as
you realize now, it can grt out of hand,
no one wins and someone always gets hurt,
I learned this from experience!
Good luck!
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Jaleigh
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 19 Oct 2005 Posts: 34
Posted: 07-30-06 13:14pm
Obviously, this is a bad situation and I
hate that you are stuck in the middle of
it. However, to be honest with you, I
really don't blame your brother at all for
what he did. If it had been me, I
probably would have done the same. I'm
sure your brother understands that you
love this guy, but you have to realize
that your brother loves you too. This is
why he done what he did. He was only
protecting you and the rest of his family.
In his mind, he was probaly thinking
that if your boyfriend could knock down
your parents door to their house, there's
no telling what else he could/would do.
Therefore, your brother had to put the
fear of god in your boyfriend to make him
realize that if he did anything to hurt
you or anyone else in his family, he would
be there to "get" him. Do you see what I
mean? I know fighting isn't the answer
to all problems, but sometimes that's the
only way some people know how to handle
certain situations. Especially, when it
involves the ones that you love the most
and you want to protect them. If I were
you, I would give this relationship a
break for awhile. See if your boyfriend
is really what you want right now. You
may find out later on down the road that
you may be happier without him. Love is
not supposed to hurt. So, if it does,
something isn't right with that
relationship. It usually only gets worst
unfortunately. Just try to be a little
understanding to why your brother done
what he did. I'm sure he was only trying
to do what he felt was the right thing to
do at that time.
