I would check to see if maybe a family member or close friend that isn't going to be at the party would do it first.

Personally, I wouldn't leave my baby with a stranger, but thats me. If they are licensed and all that, then that's a little different!

Hmmm, licensed or not I would not leave my baby with a stranger. Just because a company/person has a license doesn't mean they won't neglect/harm your baby for a quick buck. I'd definately do as baby g suggested and check with a family member or very close friend to watch your son for you. You can never be too careful, especially since he's only a few weeks old, he can't tell you if anything bad happened. What about a night with .Grandma??

You should of thought about the partying and etc before you got pregnant.


I would never leave my child with a babysitter, but only my mom. This older lady just got charged with beating the babies she was watching.

Plus, it's a stranger. Aren't we supposed to raise our kids telling them not to talk to strangers? But yet hiring a babysitter you don't even know is okay?

Pretty messed..

That's a pretty good point :p

i wouldn't do it, especially not until 3 or so in the morning.

Me and my hubby are drinking on his birthday, about a month and a half after our son will be born, but we are staying in a hotel that night. I would never let a complete stranger watch my baby. My aunt is going to watch him. I would definitley try to find a family member who could watch him for you instead of a stranger!

You should never leave your child with someone you don't know, especially when it's because you want to get your groove on....... Think with your brain hunny!

How would you feel if you left him with this person only to find out later that your child was (sexually) abused??? You would blame yourself. So save yourself the time and heart ache, and your childs innocence!!!

i am not being rude ..But would you actually take the chance of letting someone hurt your baby..Im sorry but I wouldnt ever even *think* about letting someone I dont know watch my son...Which I dont do the party life anymore..Because I am a mom and love it..Your being very selfish ...Putting a party before you child...Because seriously my childs well-being is much more important than going out and getting wasted with your friends...And also your friends shouldnt be mad or even the least bit upset with you ..If you dont show for the party..They should understand you are a mom and you cant...And if they are mad ..Then they arent true friends in the first place..

That's kind of what being a mother is about hun. Not to be b*tchy but i'm going through this same with my friend irl so I don't have a lot of patience with people who have kids and then dump them so they can go back to being teens.

You knew when you decided to continue your pregnancy and when you agreed to raise your son that it meant you'd be restricted in what you could do. If you weren't ready to leave childish things behind, you should have aborted or given your son up for adoption. You can't have your cake and eat it too. Have your son and then dump him every time some big party comes up that you want to go to. It doesn't work like that.

Especially if you're breastfeeding. You lectured others about being bad parents in the circumcision debate but you're planning on leaving your what..Like 2 week old son with whoever you can find so you can go out and get wasted and come back hungover and provide adequit care to him? While you feed him breastmilk full of alcohol and/or drugs?

Not good.

Yeah good points but I didnt plan to get pregnant, and I tried to do the right thing by not aborting him because it wasnt his fault he was here, I just dont want my life to be over because im a mother. I want to go out and do stuff sometimes like this party, you're only young once and I dont want to waste it all being with my son 24/7 tied down. I want to have fun aswell. Dont you guys still go out even though you're a parent?

I dont have any family here, so I phoned a childminder who's number I got out the phone book and she said she will have him for the whole night if I drop him off at her house, she said she does it for someone else too who stays out all night once a month. Which is good cos my mates want a place to crash after the party so I can let them stay here without worrying about him being surrounded by drunk/high people and sex

hunter im going to express milk over the next few days, store it in the freezer so he can have that while hes at her house, and i'll keep some here for the day after the party when I get him back, because alcohol will still be in it? And im buying some formula just incase its not enough.

Personally have the sitter come over first while your home doing whatever(sleeping etc) for a trial run if all work out then you get her again for a small amount of time usually by the third time you can go out longer.

If your going to be partying I would drop your kid off with a parent or family member, I go out and I need it so no its not part of being a mother because being a mother means being good to yourself as well and taking care of your mental/pyhsical health and this is where im going to disagree with the majority of you all!!

The only reason I trust sitters is cause I have to work and how do you work without putting your trust in that person, I understand fully that they may not provide the same parenting style as I do but who cares cause it's better for the kid to be with someone besides the parent all the time(proven fact) mom and kids both need alone time its not healthy to be with them everyday day24/7 of the year!! Just dont abuse it allie!

It's your choice allie.

Personally, no. I don't go out anymore. I gave that up to be with my son. He just turned 15 months old and i've been out in the evening twice. Once for my birthday and that was with my mother and my mil so it wasn't exactly getting sloshed and the other time for a friend's birthday and it was dinner at a high class restaurant so again...Not sloshed. And both times my son was with his father, not a sitter. And he was like 10 months old and went to his dad's, not a sitter. I don't think i'd leave him with a sitter yet still.

And I know a lot of my friends didn't go out for the evening/night until their kids were 2.

But that's just us.

Do what you want to do. I just think it's sad you think it's so horrible to be a mother now and want to get away from it already.

It depends on how trusting of a person you are. I have never had a babysitter that wasn't family, just becuz im very wary of people. Now that i'll have two kid tho, I might have to rely on getting some sitters, tho i'd use family friends more than likely or still go to family first.

Babysitting services oculd be trustful, but then again some might not be. After watching maury im scarred. Its kinda like daycares too tho. In both there are always people who shouldnt be watching kids.

that's true diamondz....In the case of older children. We're talking about a 2 or 3 week old newborn baby and in that case it's actually a proven fact that it needs to be with mum as much as possible.

And i'd agree about the going out if she had posted something like "my baby is 12 months old and my boyfriend and I haven't had one evening together. My mum has said she'd take him...Is that alright?"

rather then something like what she did. "lyk omg there's this huge party and lyk 300 people r gunna b there and my friends r expecting me to go and i'd just diiiiiiiiiiiiiee if I didn't. I've been a mum for a whole 2 weekssss! I'm so bored with bein a mum! I wanna go out and get waaaaaaaasted!!!"

it just doesn't do anyone any good to put yourself in bad situations like that. Bad enough as a regular teen. Worse when you're the sole provider for an innocent baby. Your body doesn't need alcohol or drugs. Neither does your emotions.

*shrug* I just don't see it going well in any way. Has she introduced bottles before? What happens if she takes off and her son doesn't take a bottle? Her son goes hungry for hours on end. Or it can go the other way and there's nipple confusion or preferences to bottle over breast. Maybe she doesn't care but she seems pro-breastfeeding and even one or two bottles at that age can actually end the breastfeeding. What if something bad happens to him? What if he doesn't want to be with the sitter? I know when my son was like 2 weeks old he mostly screamed if anyone but me had him. What if she gets so tanked she has unprotected sex? Or worse, gets raped? Or drives/gets in a car with a drunk driver?

But i'm a geriatric who thinks (and has seen) of consequences and happens to like spending time with my son. What do I know? :wink:

Isn't anyone you know available? I completely see your point about wanting a life, and I think it's your right to have one, but the world isn't the .Babysitter's .Club. :-)

hunterjumper, where did you get this proven fact from? Newborns are pretty happy with anyone, as far as I know. Being without her for one night isn't gonna warp the kid.

Yeah I know what you mean...But I dont hate being his mum and I like spending time with him, im just frustrated I cant do what I want anymore. I dont feel I should be going to this party, but then I think maybe its because i'll worry about him or something silly like because I havent been to any parties since I got pregnant so im kinda a bit nervous. Excited though, but nothing bad should happen, one person in my group of friends is driving us there and back so he wont be drinking, and everyone knows to watch your drink so it doesnt get spiked. Im expressing milk to last that night and the next day so its okay that im drinking/taking drugs. Not that im exactly planning to but I know some will be so I probably will. Can you get pregnant this soon after having a baby? I didnt think you could. I guess if he doesnt settle with the sitter then she can phone me on my mobile, but as she does this for another person all night once a month im not too worried. Shes experienced, sounded really nice on the phone, she was surprised that I want to leave him all night so soon... The other baby she has over night is 18 months.

Ummmm... Excuse me, but your immaturity is showing. You'll probably want to cover that up dear.

If you don't want your baby give him up for adoption. Trust me, from the sounds of you it seems like the most humane thing to do for the poor little guy. When you decided to be a mother you gave up all the stupid teenage bull and no, if you want to keep your son you can't have it back. Trust me, your friends are not depending on you to be at this party, your friends will have forgotten about you entirely in a few months anyway. The only person who is depending on you is your son. And his needs far transcend your friends, and your own right now.

When you make a commitment to have a child, you make a commitment to care for him properly. Leaving him with someone you don't know so that you can go out, get out of your face intoxicated and then come home and breastfeed? That is so far beyond disgusting it hurts my head.

I sure hope cps finds out about you.

you bet your ass you can! Do you not have a talk with your doctor about birth control? Did you not learn your lesson about birth control after you became an unwilling mother? Do you know how many women show up at a 6 month baby wellness appoint only to find out that they are pregnant again.

Not to mention that having sex this soon after pregnancy can lead to a whole myriad of infections and other problems that you don't want.

If you are insistant on carrying through with this unbeleivably irresponsible act... Please have enough foresight to at least get a refrence from the sitter.

Its 1 freak'n night

Where is this whole 'mothers can't have lives, you evil b*tch' thing coming from? Is that what maturity is these days?

When you have a baby, you don't have to give up everything. It's not healthy if you do, in fact. Becoming a mother does not have to mean you give up your own life to raise another- it's possible to have kids and a life at the same time.