Teen Pregnancy Forum - I Need a Lot of Help Please!!!

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Q: I Need a Lot of Help Please!!!

asked by: humanerror23 on March 21st, 2006

New User

please respond seriously this is a very serious topic. This is not a joke no matter what some may think. This is the sad unfortunate truth.

just to be forewarned, this is going to be a lengthy story. But if you're looking for the jist of it, my sister is pregnant and i'm the father.

About 2 months ago, my 16 year old little sister and me (a 18 year old male) went to a high school party together. When we got to the party, we realized it was not what we were expecting. Someone brought in a keg and a lot of the people there were drunk and there were drugs being passed around. Eventually a few of our friends came up to us with some meth and, thanks to peer pressure, both of us tried it a couple of times.

Near the end of the party both of us were very high and everything. Luckily, the one smart thing we did that day was to get a sober friend to bring us home so that we didn't hurt ourselves on the way home. Neither me nor my sister really remember the events that happened after we got home, but the next morning we woke up cuddling with each other's naked body. Needless to say, both of us were pretty worried about it. For the next few days neither of us looked directly into each other's eyes because we were afraid of what happened.

We decided to not dwell on it for forever, and we both hoped that we didn't do anything together that night. For a while both our minds were at ease and we were able to talk and look at each other again without fear. However after a month and a half went by, my sister told me that she hasn't had her period yet.

A few days ago my sister and I went to the free clinic together to find out if she is pregnant and they said that she is definately pregnant. As of now, only my sister, anyone who reads this, the clinic, and I know about the pregnancy.

I really need help with what to do about this situation. My parents are very serious pro-life people and we do not know how to tell them about the pregnancy.

Replies(228)

shuett

replied on March 21st, 2006

Experienced User

Hi there

first - are you 100% sure that she is pregnant with your baby? Could she have been with someone else on that night or another time?

If you are biological sister/brother I think you need to seek medical attention/counselling immediately. There are tests they can perform to check for abnormalities etc.

Best of luck,
sandy

humanerror23

replied on March 21st, 2006

New User

Yes I am sure it is mine. Before me, she was a virgin, and she hasn't slept with anyone since. Also can you all help me with ideas on how to break the news to our folks?

shuett

replied on March 21st, 2006

Experienced User

I don't think there is an easy way to do that. I think they will be devestated.

Imo you need to go to a counsellor - and tell them with the counsellor present. I think your whole family is going to need some help to get through this.

Sorry :(

humanerror23

replied on March 21st, 2006

New User

Do u think if we maybe lied about who the kid was it would make it easier? I know its not the best thing but it would help get through the part of telling them my sister is pregnant.

shuett

replied on March 21st, 2006

Experienced User

You haven't said if she is your biological sister, but i'm assuming she is.

I think its a possibility that you may have a child with severe defects. I think you need to be responsible and think of that first. As for lying about who the father is to your parents, I think it will catch up with you eventually. Everything comes out in the wash sooner or later.

I know of a family where a baby was born to a half brother/sister - same father, different mother (they didn't know at the time but thats a whole other story). The little boy they had is perfect, but they were told by doctors that the defects might show in his children when he's an adult.

Carrie-Lucie

replied on March 21st, 2006

Experienced User

There are so many people who are gonna go whoa! And most of them need not know (don't lie just don't tell them)... However I think your parents need to know at least so they understand that you are both going through some major thing.

Have you decided what you are going to do about the pregnancy? Is abortion an option? If it is then maybe this would be the best way forward - just an idea, but there are so many things which could happen birth defects wise... Also people will find out and it is a very unusual circumstance.

As well as thinking of yourselves think of the child, some birth defects can be fatal or very nasty also think about telling him/her about their parentage later on, as you would have to.

Hope this helped... Good luck.

humanerror23

replied on March 21st, 2006

New User

Yes she is my biological sister.I don't know if abortionw ould evenb e an option because as I stated earlier "our parents are very pro-life" they think that every soul deserves a chance. About the lieing of the father. I wasn't going to keep it fromt hem forever, just until they got over the whole "she's pregnant!?!?" phase

Rodge

replied on March 21st, 2006

Active User, very eHealthy

I doubt it'll have three heads or anything. It's just that if you have any genetically inherited diseases in the family, the chances of the kid having and/or carrying them is larger.

The whole taboo thing is actually harder to deal with. I don't think having a counsellor present will help in telling your parents. They're gonna kill you- could even prosecute you, if they're that way inclined. What sort of people are they? How do you think they'll react?

I might get jumped on for this, but are there any confidential abortion clinics in your area, where your sister could go without your parents knowing?

mum???

replied on March 21st, 2006

Experienced User

Hi there,listen as I do not believe in abortion I do not think its the right thing to do...Whatever you and your sister has done,the baby doesnt know a thing about it.I think the best thing to do is to not tell yopur parents that you are the father...If they prosecute (which they could do)you would probably end up in jail,just be the loving big brother who stands next to his little sister through thick and thin...Be there for them both without making things look dodgy.Whats happened has happened and there is no turning back.
I have actualy heard of this situation before and they just got through it...There parents and family never found out.You have a big responsbility now and i'm sure everythings going to be alright.

Rodge

replied on March 21st, 2006

Active User, very eHealthy

How the hell can everything be all right? He knocked up his sister. That sort of thing isn't something you can just brush off and never think of again.

I wouldn't want to carry my brother's baby after a drunken meth-fuelled one night stand. I know it's not the baby's fault, but seriously, would you?

Go on, if you've got a brother, think of him. If you don't, think of your father (cause that happens too). Now imagine you both got stoned and had wild monkey sex. Together. Now imagine he got you pregnant. If you're not feeling absolute horror, you're not doing it right.

Jennie25

replied on March 21st, 2006

Experienced User

rodge wrote:

go on, if you've got a brother, think of him. If you don't, think of your father (cause that happens too). Now imagine you both got stoned and had wild monkey sex. Together. Now imagine he got you pregnant. If you're not feeling absolute horror, you're not doing it right.

lmao! I'm not even going to try to think of that...*shudder* lol but I do agree with you, I wouldn't want to have their baby. Like someone asked earlier, are there any abortion clinics you can go to without ur parents knowing...Even if they are pro-life, its up to u two what to do...And if I was ur parents and very prochoice.The moment I foundout my daughter was preg. With my sons baby---i would bend my rules for them. Incest children are more likely to have defects..And its just plain wrong..

mum???

replied on March 21st, 2006

Experienced User

Lol roge...Sorry I made you think badly but I am only trying to help...The poor kid needs some reasurance and like I said whats done is done and the clock will not be turned bk (unfortuanetly)...Yes thanks to u I cant get the image of me and my brother at it like rabbits out of my head now and feel very green.But this guy needs some serious help...Maybe you should talk about abortion even though I am strongly against it...Every woman has that right.

diamondsz

replied on March 21st, 2006

Extremely eHealthy

Wow first off dont do drugs!!

As for the pregnancy its her choice if she would like to keep it or not!! Here is where things get sticky you need to tell the dr (its not a myth there could be serious problems with the child) and because she is younger it could play up on her life as well resultling in a medical termination.

I dont know how your dealing with this, another thing they can do which may bring you some hope is amnio(centis) or something like that anyways they can do a paternity test before the baby is even born . I used to be a heavy drug user when I was a teen but I remebered who I kissed(messed etc) sorry to be blunt but anyways I would double check cause meth doesnt usually f8ck you up that bad unless they spiked it with other drugs.

I hope everything turns out okay just becarful (even if it did happen(you had sex without b/c) anyways im gonna stop rambling you are really going to need to talk to someone and a dr has to keep everything private make an appt pronto so tests etc can get done quicker etc!!

AshBoBash

replied on March 21st, 2006

Experienced User

Ok that must of been some serious dank you guys smoked and you must of drank straight gasoline or something
i've been drunk and high before but always managed to keep myself out of my brothers bed
i know someone asked this and I know you think the baby is yours but are you sure? If your sister would sleep with her own brother when shes drunk I think its safe to assume she'd sleep with pretty much anyone. Thats just nasty.

If your parentshave morals about being pro-life then i'm sure they have morals against premartial sex and incest just imagine how they are going to react when they find out your sister is not only pregnant but by you
that is wrong, I can't imagine both of you being so messed up out of your gourds that neither one of you could even slightly realize what was going on and stop it from going further
i mean give me a break.

Rodge

replied on March 21st, 2006

Active User, very eHealthy

I never thought it would be normal to see a thirteen-year-old talking about her experiences while stoned. And yet, against the rest of the thread...

A lot of people have a 'god, what did I do last night?' moment. It's just not that often that the answer is 'screwed my sister'.

humanerror23

replied on March 21st, 2006

New User

I positive that the kid is mine. My sister is normally a very good kid, I mean she is an honor student and very high ranked in her class. I don't know if I would be able to keep this a secret for so long. When we went to this party we never wanted anything bad to happen. We just tried the drugs because we were interested in what it was like. Both of us had heard before that they can really mess up your life but I never imagined like this! I'm going to go to jail for this and it is all my fault because i'm the one who brought my sister to the party. I do not know of any abortion clinics near here plus if my parents ever found she had an abortion, my sister would be disowned and I don't want her life to be completely ruin forever.

Eyes Wide Shut

replied on March 21st, 2006

Especially eHealthy

Well yo, I think if she was such a "good" person, that she would've turned the meth away....Along with the beer and whatever else yall consumed. Like ya girl said, i've been tore up before but come on!!

Yall should've thought about that(ruining each others lives) before yall started making out...I think I would've had a huge reality check as soon as our lips touched!! Yikes!!

Good luck and I hope everything works out for the best...And I really hope that this isn't real...Maybe i'm dreaming!!

Sarah

Rodge

replied on March 21st, 2006

Active User, very eHealthy

I got the impression thought wasn't much involved in this. It's like in films- you take the drugs, and then it's all swirly bright colours and the .Happy .Tree .Friends theme tune until you wake up spooned with your sister. Dun dun duhhh! :p

diamondsz

replied on March 21st, 2006

Extremely eHealthy

rodge wrote:

i got the impression thought wasn't much involved in this. It's like in films- you take the drugs, and then it's all swirly bright colours and the .Happy .Tree .Friends theme tune until you wake up spooned with your sister. Dun dun duhhh! :p

i dont take anything anymore but usually the first time you do meth its a high for awhile and then u get sick(kinda like hangover) but you know whats going around but at the same time its surreal! I was lil caca when I was a teen!

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