!**@!

i think my law degree and career indicates I am certainly not an idiot. I did not realise initially that the post was old but it did get a response from you (the previous being ignored). You .D.I.D. Make a mistake and I simply pointed that out. Now grow up and start debating.

Sandyallen, I totally agree with your post. It seems that people just have a very narrow view (when pro-life) and attempt to generalize, forgetting that no two situations are the same. Until they have been in a position where they needed an abortion then they need to stop interfearing with the rights of women.

even though this was probably not directed at me, I have an answer that I give to this.

First, I was born after roe. Therefore, my mother had ample opportunity to decide not to remain pregnant. However, since she .P.L.A.N.N.E.D to become pregnant and .P.L.A.N.N.E.D my birth (and to a large degree a large portion of my life), I was a very much wanted and loved child. I have had everything that I could possibly need and want my entire life. In comparison, my husband's mother did not plan his birth or childhood. He lived in crushing poverty for the first 18 years of his life until he met and moved in with me. Neither of my sisters planned their pregnancies and they also live in very poor conditions with a very low quality of life with their children.

Secondly, my mother has always told me that this was my life and that I had to live it, no one else. When I experienced my ectopic pregnancy, she was the second person I told (my husband being the first). She was very caring but very firm. She told me not to let my emotions get in the way of the decision that had to be made, that the longer I waited, the more risk I was taking. Then, when I discovered that it was ectopic, she told me not to forget that even though I had no choice that I had already made a decision. In that way she didn't want to see me become a victim to fate. My mother is a prochoice feminist, always has been and always will be. She supports women in whatever choice that they make just as she supported me. She made her choices, she planned both of her pregnancies, and I made my choice in planning my family.

Thirdly, "selfishness", much like beauty, is in the eye of the beholder. To me, my mother-in-law was selfish in starting to have children very young when she did not have the skills necessary to care for them. To me, both of my sisters were selfish for bringing more children into the world after they had had their first even though they were already living in poverty with their first children. My own mother, however, I have never viewed as being selfish. She had me and my brother when she knew she was ready, when she had the resources not only to take care of us but also to take care of my half and step sisters, and when she wanted to. She has used every tool available to her to keep from becoming or remaining pregnant when she knew that she could not offer a decent existence to her child.

Fourthly, some of these people seem to be under the mistaken impression that I care at all what they think of me and my decisions. Call me selfish, call me whatever you wish because I know it's not true and because the only person's opinions that concern me are my own. I am planning my family, using every tool available to me to do so, very carefully so that my own children have all (and more) of the opportunities that I had. This includes a decent home (and not the shack's both of my sisters still reside in), a well-paying job with opportunities for promotion, stable and reliable transportation, my master's degree (i refuse to have children until I feel that I have the proper amount of education to secure the wealth that it will take to give them a proper education), and savings and investments. If we never obtain these things to a sufficient level, then it will be irresponsible of us to have children that we cannot properly care for.

And lastly, people who have never experienced a problem pregnancy or an unwanted pregnancy lack the ability to emphathize with .Women who are laboring under these stressful conditions. Because of this, .Women who are experiencing this should make their decisions themselves, without the interference of people who cannot understand the true reasons why any woman would obtain an abortion.
Peace,
jenn

actually, that is anti choicers who do that. Telling women what they can do with their bodies. Try again, cowboy.

i was offering the common explanations that I give to those who actually ask me questions about my experience to learn something themselves. For all others simply seeking to pass judgement or feel morally superior, I don't care. And, if it was a waste of time for you, no one forced you to read it or respond to it. ;)

as for myself, I feel that if others here can learn from my post then it is never a waste of time for me to take a few minutes and post. I also believe that you misunderstood me. I do care that people who are open minded enough to seriously question me understand that which I am trying to impart to them. For the closed minded, however, I do not care which is why I do not post on the anti-choice forum.
Peace,
jenn

if I feel that something needs to be removed or deleted or locked.. I will do so.. That is my title not your's....