Imodium Queen

Hi everyone,
i have had bowel problems for years. I have gone to several drs one told me I was to young to have cancer and that it was probably hemmroids. I have recently gone to 4 drs who have suggested colonoscopy. I haven't insurance and so I put it off. I have more excuses then that I also have a 2 year old, I keep asking myself who will care for him. Also finding out the results scare me to death. It has gone untreated for so long that it can't be good. My symptoms control my life. I want my life back. I have diarrhea on a daily basis. If traveling I tank up on imodium. When eating out I have to either take it home or go directly home sometimes I don't make it home. No warning or control it just happens. I avoid traveling. I don't like to shop with my friends for fear of having an accident. I have sometimes passed straight blood with mucus. I haven't really noticed a certain type of food that triggers this. I had one Dr. Who is thinking crohens disease. I have thought through the years it was ibs and delt with it with imodiium. I am going to get in and have a colonoscopy done. But I am so scared of what they will find. I am so glad I have found this forum maybe with some incouragement I will go get the testing done asap I would love to hear from you. If anyone else has these symptoms let me know thanks and god bless all of you