I've been in a relationship for over 4 years now with my girlfriend. We began dating in high school and have been together all the way through college. We were absolutely caught up with each other for the first few years. That has now worn off for me. She practically lives with me in my apartment now. We are both getting ready to graduate from college soon. I am now at the point where I need to make some big life decisions. She wants to get married eventually, not right away. I think that eventually I will want to marry her. She dated a few other people in high school with extremely limited sexual relations. She is the first girl I was ever with. I have had no other sexual exerience or experience dating. She is very cute, but not drop dead gorgeous. I can't conquer the thoughts of marrying without ever atleast dating or experiencing someone else. The relationship has gotten somewhat boring and I know that any other relationship would be the same after a while. What should I do? Will I over come these thoughts? Is it just because I know I have the ability to get out now and I am thinking like a young boy who wants another woman? I don't know if I should take the time now to experience someone else. This would be a horrible situation. Do you think I will over come this as I grow older and get out of college or do you think the thoughts will only get stronger? I can't get these thoughts out of my head. Please help!
I'm not going to say I know so much from personal experience,but I do know of a four year relationship that did break for similiar reasoning. The couple decided to part ways and try out their independence when things became too stuffy and repetitive. Plus ,they've only been with each other in life. And in their doing so,one found someone else. This happens and its ok becuase hearts change. It's very serious ,very emotional.Its rough to have a high school relationship go successful once your graduated h.S because a serious relationship in high school restricts alot of things you could be experiencing,but can't because of your die hard commitment to your mate. It is normal to have a few different relations before marriage when you are single and young,and for some its normal to stay with one person and never know what it's like to experience others. But if you are experiencing those feelings,and arent feeling too happy,maybe you havent exactly done your share of maturing and experiencing to complete you, before you seal the deal. Try to organize what it is you really seek.You also have to find out is it hormones? Or just the pre-marital jitters? Fear of commitment? I mean if your mate just isn't doing it for you,then your due for a reality check. Whats made you go on for so long? Think about how much you love this girl,is she everything you want? Think about if she has the ability to make you happy,does she wish to keep doing so? Is she really the one? Does she love you greatly? If so,maybe this is right decision to stay in your relationship. You decide. If these feelings of drifting strongly persist and you are still in confusion,i'd say discuss a possible break with your partner,a short break to clear your mind. From there maybe find out what direction you wish to pursue.
Maybe you should take a break. Im in a 3 year relationship and I know what you are talking about. Everything is always the same and it gets boring. Also then you end up getting moody with one anoher. I would recommend talking to her about it.
I think maybe you should see other people and have limits. Then you will find out if you are really ment to be.... Also maybe you will get some of the sparks back. It will be hard to take a break but after you might feel better.