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February 8th, 2006
Hi, I am a mother of a 23 month old and curious about some ways he has been acting lately. I have a 2 year check up for him on the 8th of february, and was planning on talking to the doc about some concerns I have been having, but with my past experiences with other problems I have learned that sometimes being prepared with the right questions is best. So I figured I would post on here and get some opinions from others on this issue. I have been reading up alot on autism, and have read that no 2 autistic kids are the same....But maybe somet things he has been doing may look familiar to some people?? Also if there was things that your children did that you wouldnt have thought of would be helpful too, because I have discovered through reading that some things my son has been doing other autistic kids do.....So anything is helpful. These are the things he has been doing that have been concerning me.

He is very very picky about what he eats and has been since day one, and will only eat a couple different foods. Alot of people have told me he will eat when he is hungry, but he wont. He will act hungry and I will offer him whatever I have cooked for the rest of the family, and he will look at it and yell no.

He hits himself in the head, in the face, pulls out his hair when frustrated (which seems like he is always frustrated)

from the age of 6 mos he will not cuddle, or sit on anyones lap or show any kind of affection, and rejects affection when you try to give it to hiim.

He doesnt seem to know the difference between when I am happy with him or upset with him.

He only says a few words, and the wards he does say are not the right way....For example, thank you is : duh duh, all done is : ahda, more is : ma, I love you is : I wa. , and help is: ah huh ah huh ah huh. The only other words he knows is mama, and da (means dad).

He has been making a hyperventalating noise when ever he wants something even when he is not frustrated.

He uses the word no in two different ways. He uses in the right way when he doesnt want something, but also says : "no no no no no" when he wants something. He seems to say the word over and over and over, same with when he wants help he says "ah huh ah huh ah huh ah huh".

He doesnt know how to follow any directions.

He will only sleep in a completely silent and dark room by himself.


Does this sound "normal" to anyone? I am only 21, and this is my first child, my second is only 6 weeks old right now. I know 2 year olds can be very defiant and go through the "terrible 2" stage, but to me he just doesnt seem right compared to other kids.

Also, I forgot to add that when we go places in the car he is completely silent the whole trip and doesnt make a sound and just stares foreward. Even on long trips. We recently took a 3000 mile trip and drove prettey much the whole day and stopped only at night to sleep. And the whole trip he stared foreward with a blank look, didnt care to play with toys and didnt say a word.

Any advice would be helpful. And maybe if some of the things I have mentioned sound familiar you could let me know that it is important to make sure I let my doc know. I figure as many things as I can think of to tell him would be good.

Thanks for your help,
laurie
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jenweric
replied February 13th, 2006
Autism
Hi,

i have worked with autistic kids for years. No, it doesn't sound like your son is autistic. My son, who is around the same age, does the same things. That's normal. Autism is turning into mass hysteria!! It's crazy.
Now, at that age, kids with autism do not respond when his/her name is called. They act like they are deaf. If your son is responding to his name and looks in your direction when you talk to him, most likely he is not autistic. I hope that helps.

Jen
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mommyx2
replied February 13th, 2006
Ok, thankyou for your opinion. Should I be conscerned at all about the way he is acting and not talking? I feel so frustrated, and I feel the frustration in him with not being able to communicate. People have told me to try reading to him, but he gets very very angry when I try and doesnt want me to. When I try to teach him the right words,or tell him the right word to say for something (instead of just grunting) he gets very frustrated as if I am telling him no. Did your son have any kind of speach therapy to help him??
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jenweric
replied February 14th, 2006
Behavior
Hi again,

no, I wouldn't be concerned, but if you are, take him to a doctor to get checked out. He is only 23 months old. Some kids don't start talking until they are 2 1/2 or 3 yrs old. There is such a wide range in developmental milestones. Don't go by the books, either. My son didn't start walking until 19 months!! And he is normal. Don't go by me 100% because I never actually saw your son, so it's worth getting him checked anyway.
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jaycmartin
replied February 20th, 2006
Re: Behavior
jenweric wrote:
hi again,

no, I wouldn't be concerned, but if you are, take him to a doctor to get checked out. He is only 23 months old. Some kids don't start talking until they are 2 1/2 or 3 yrs old. There is such a wide range in developmental milestones. Don't go by the books, either. My son didn't start walking until 19 months!! And he is normal. Don't go by me 100% because I never actually saw your son, so it's worth getting him checked anyway.


i also have a son with similar issues. We heard the same thing when he was 3 that he may just be a late starter. Sadly he is now 5 and still can't communicate properly. We (his parents) are frustrated with the doctors and medical experts as none have told us exactly what our child's problem is. Our child can't be the first to have this problem so why not just tell us? If he is autistic we want to know and if he's mentally retarded we want to know. We have a daughter 2 years younger who is perfectly normal so we can easily draw comparisons and know that something is obviously wrong.

Maybe someone on this forum can help. Our son plays with his toys in a very idiosyncratic way. He lays flat with his cheek on the carpet and stares at the side of his toy cars. He can't handle multiple requests. For example if we say "put the spoon in the sink and the paper in the trash" both items might end up in the sink or trash. If you ask "did you have fun at school today?" he will usually say "school today" if you ask him questions he will usually repeat the last word of the question instead of answering it. "what are you eating?" answer "eating" instead of "apple sauce." he can't do the homework his teacher sends home. He had to count objects and circle the number but when he counts he almost always skips an object and ends up with 9 apples instead of 10. He is in kindergarten with normal kids.

We think he is autistic but we don't have phds. We're just parents. He has had an mri on his brain and an ekg to test his brain waves. All tests ok. Doctors say he is not autistic. He was attending speech therapy but the cost got overwhelming with our other essential bills. We will start sending him again if we can't find a special school with financial aid for kids like him.

Hopefully someone can tell us something - anything.
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jenweric
replied February 20th, 2006
Autism
Hi,

i am not qualified to diagnose your son, but I have worked with lots of kids in the autism spectrum. Have you ever heard of pdd(pervasive developmental disorder)?? Kids who are given the label "autistic" have specific traits taken from the dsm book(a guide for psychologists). However, children who have some traits from the autism diagnosis but not all, may be diagnosed as pdd. You may want to look into that more.
There are programs, funded by the state, like provider 50 services for kids in the autism spectrum. Provider 50 services are mental health services and they do provide therapists who do special programs with pdd/autistic children at your house. I'm sure they have theses services in all states. Also, there are school speech therapists available(you don't have to pay). I work for a provider 50 program and we do drills with the children. These drills are specialized for each child. Language skills and social skills are programs in aba(applied behavioral analysis). So, hopefully this may help a little!!! Call your human services hotline in your area and I am sure they can refer you to a provider 50 program(if necessary) for an evaluation. But make sure that the provider 50 business has specialized autism therapies(discrete trial or aba). But typically, provider 50 programs are for mental health cases(bipolar kids, add, adhd, oppositional defiant disorder,etc)
jen
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jaycmartin
replied February 22nd, 2006
Hi jen, thanks so much for your reply. It is very refreshing to just talk to someone who seems to understand our frustration. We were not aware of "provider 50" programs and will be calling our local human services to find out more. Hopefully this new info will begin a more encouraging journey than our last 4+ years. Thanks again.
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fireball01
replied April 13th, 2006
Ive got asbergers which is a form of autism,
it sort of sounds like a form of adhd but not to certain because the autistic spectrum is quite vast, it may also be a kind of dispraxia or deslexia, but you should not try to relly on books and stuff because you will over worry about that, so I would just tink of a few questions or the doctor and the go see him and try not to get worked up over it.
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