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I'm Pregnant....boyfriend Wants An Abortion.

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holidaycheer01

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I'm Pregnant....boyfriend Wants An Abortion.
Posted: 01-29-06 08:43am

I really don't want an abortion but I told him i'm willing to look into all the options. Has anyone had the pill abortion or vaccum? What was it like? Everytime I think about keeping it he gets mad. I just need to talk to someone who has done it.
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teach486

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Posted: 01-29-06 09:32am

It isn't your boyfriend's choice to make, plain and simple. He helped to create a life, and now he has to grow up and deal with the consequences of his actions. You do what feels right to you. Do not let anyone pressure you into doing something that you won't be able to live with. If you want to keep it, keep it. If you do not feel right about an abortion, consider adoption.
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lsipes

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Posted: 01-29-06 11:06am

I agree wholeheartedly. Do not let him force you into anything. You're going to be the one that has to live with it for the rest of your life!!! He has no right to tell you that you *should* have an abortion. And to be honest, if I had a boyfriend like that i'd dump his ass anyway.
Looking at all of your options is the best route to take but do not let him pressure you into any decision that you will regret. Why does he get mad? What are his reasons for wanting you to abort?
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holidaycheer01

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Posted: 01-29-06 11:38am

Well he's been really sweet to me telling me he just isnt ready and that he wants us to wait a few years, get married and then try again. But he doesn't want anything to do with a baby right now. He just feels we arent ready I guess.... Its so messed up :(
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Worried_Dee

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Been There, Done That
Posted: 01-29-06 11:50am

Well, I am 15 and I went through the same thing that you are going through. I found out that I was pregnant on christmas of 05. I told my boyfriend and he was telling me to get a abortion, but for the right reasons, anyway I had mixed feelings about the situation I wanted to keep my baby, but if I was to keep it then I will be taking care of it by myself but I never came to a decision. He had set up a appointment for january 28 at the abortion center so I had until then to make my decision but I had a miscarriage on january 14 so lucky I didn't have to go through that horrible experience.
But do what is right for you and your family. And hear your boyfriend out about the situation, if there is a real serious reason to why he dosen't want a child then consider. But don't let this stress you out and you end up miscarring like I did before you make up your mind. Just sit down and talk to him and maybe he will understand where you are coming from and say "baby, let's have our baby!" :d
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fatfamily02

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Posted: 01-29-06 12:47pm

.D.O. N.O.T let anyone talk you into abortion--boyfriend, mother, father, sybling, it is you decision. And seriously it is homicide--please think very hard if you are planning on doing it. It will affect your life forever. God does not approve of this kinda thing, so you might think of that also.
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Lalee

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Posted: 01-29-06 14:39pm

First of all, fatfamily, it is not fair or right for you to try and scare that girl by saying those things. Whether you believe they are true or not, not everyone is like you and you have no right to try and use .God to force her to make a certain decision.... It makes you just as bad as her boyfriend.

As for you, holiday, don't let him or anyone else pressure you into anything. In the end: yes, he does have a say in the child's life, but he's not the one who would have to go through the abortion. I'm not saying having one or not having one is the way to go; it's different with everyone and every situation. What you should do is just think hard about what's best for you... Whether it be having an abortion, having the baby and putting him/her up for adoption or keeping the baby. There are other options than abortion if you aren't ready for a child.

Good luck to you, hon, and let us know what happens.
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acoles70

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Joined: 09 Nov 2005
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Posted: 01-29-06 15:31pm

First off, he doesn't have a say in whether you keep the baby or not. He might choice to be a deadbeat and walk away. He layed down, he needs to own up to the consequences. Babies aren't just there for whenever it is convient for him. Do not let someone else make this decision for you. You will have to live with it the rest of your life.
Ashlee
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fatfamily02

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Posted: 01-29-06 16:30pm

lalee wrote:
first of all, fatfamily, it is not fair or right for you to try and scare that girl by saying those things. Whether you believe they are true or not, not everyone is like you and you have no right to try and use .God to force her to make a certain decision.... It makes you just as bad as her boyfriend.



As for you, holiday, don't let him or anyone else pressure you into anything. In the end: yes, he does have a say in the child's life, but he's not the one who would have to go through the abortion. I'm not saying having one or not having one is the way to go; it's different with everyone and every situation. What you should do is just think hard about what's best for you... Whether it be having an abortion, having the baby and putting him/her up for adoption or keeping the baby. There are other options than abortion if you aren't ready for a child.



Good luck to you, hon, and let us know what happens.


facts are facts and she needs all the facts to make an informed decision. I could say "you will be damned if you do this"---but that is .Not what I said--she does need to think of that-- for her .Emotional well being. and if you dont like what I say about it maybe she could go talk to a pastor or preacher about it.

Spiritual facts are facts, whether you believe them, or believe in them--they are truth--and indeed fact. More true, and factual than anything else in this world!!! Just because a person says he dont believe dont mean it is not true, or that it will go away. For it is truth always and forever.
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sandyallen

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Posted: 01-29-06 16:48pm

Hi there! I totally agree with what lalee said. Please do not let anyone tell you what to do with your pregnancy, it is your body and your choice! You might also post this in the abortion forum, but I think you have a pretty good idea here. We are here for you whatever you decide!
Good luck with your decision!
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diamondsz

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Posted: 01-29-06 16:49pm

Hun make an informed decision,

talk to a cousellor at planned parenthood learn all your rights and see what you would be entitled too if you have it, give it up for adoption or abortion. The choice is yours 100%, if anyone tell you what to do with your life they are not your friend its okay to give advice and you make the choice.

Things wont be easy if you keep it but down here they help moms give you a place to stay, daycare, and help you so you can make the most of yourself, if you choose abortion a rela human being wont hold it against you but like I said the choice is yours.

As for fatfamilys post just ignore it god loves us all and god forgives so dont listen to this woman she abuses her own religion/religious fanatic

if ever you need an ear send me a pm im very open minded unlike some ppl
good luck with your choice
jess
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Happiness03

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Posted: 01-29-06 17:08pm

I am not about to tell you that abortion is right/wrong, but I am going to tell you to think twice about doing it. I hope you would do what you want to do. If you feel like he will leave you, and you don't think there is anyway to take care of the baby by yourself, you might consider adoption, but just know that, that could be extremly hard to do as well. Adoption/abortion are two very important life decisions. Good luck to you. Have you talked any more to your bf on this. Maybe that was just his first reaction. You may try talking to him again, and maybe his thoughts have changed. Keep us updated. You can pm me anytime if you would like to talk!
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holidaycheer01

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Joined: 17 Dec 2005
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Posted: 01-29-06 17:08pm

Thanks to everyone for responding. I do know it's 100% my choice if I have an abortion or not. It's just really hard right now. I don't want to have an abortion, but i'm scared to be a single mom too. I give lots of credit to all the single moms out there though. Honestly I almost wish I could have a miscarriage.. It'd make all this alot easier. I also understand what fatfamily said. I do think god is against abortion, although the bible does say he forgives us. My boyfriend isn't that big of an ass. He's been really great about the whole thing as far as supporting me, but not our baby. He's scared and doesn't feel ready yet. I understand where he's coming from, I just wish he'd see my side too ya know? I have until feb 14th to decide whether I want the abortion or if i'm going to keep it. I'll let you guys know. Thanks again for taking time to post.
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Mommi2Bee

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Posted: 01-29-06 17:43pm

Holiday I had an abortion a year ago and though it didn't hit me at first a couple months down the road I couldn't keep my mind off it. I still think about it everyday and wonder about my son/daughter that I didn't have. Sometimes I wish I would have thought twice about it, but sometimes I think maybe it was for the right reasons because then I really wasn't ready for a baby and I just couldn't do adoption, knowing that I have a kid out there alive with some other family raising it would probably be just as hard on me. I know now though if I would have thought twice about it or knew how I would feel a year from then I wouldn't have done it. It was really hard for me and everytime someone brings it up I just start crying.. God forgave me though and gave me a son due on may 22nd. I couldn't be more happy. Well I wish you the best in whatever you decide to do. Just remember it is your decision and your the one that will have to live with it.
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lil_blaze2004

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Posted: 01-29-06 18:50pm

Like so me of the others said don't get an abortion for someone else. Those are the abortions people regret getting. Everyone I kknow who had an abortion because they made the decision are ok with their abortion but everyone who got it cause of bf/parents regret it to this day. Pleas ethink this over carefully. This guy may not even be around this time next yr, but your child will be.
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QueenBee2_3

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Posted: 01-30-06 14:46pm

holidaycheer01 wrote:
well he's been really sweet to me telling me he just isnt ready and that he wants us to wait a few years, get married and then try again. But he doesn't want anything to do with a baby right now. He just feels we arent ready I guess.... Its so messed up :(


no matter his reasoning, if you don't want a termination for nonmedical reasons there's no legal way he can force you to do so. His reasons don't matter and legally he has no say in the matter. If you don't want to terminate then don't.
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mum2bubba

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Posted: 01-30-06 22:40pm

lsipes wrote:
i agree wholeheartedly. Do not let him force you into anything. You're going to be the one that has to live with it for the rest of your life!!! He has no right to tell you that you *should* have an abortion. And to be honest, if I had a boyfriend like that i'd dump his ass anyway.
Looking at all of your options is the best route to take but do not let him pressure you into any decision that you will regret. Why does he get mad? What are his reasons for wanting you to abort?


same, if my fiance told me that I should get an abortion he would be out in the dog house.
Do what you think is right if your bf leaves you and wants nothing to do with the baby he wasn't worth your time in the first place. Hopefully you have family and friends who are supporive of you in whatever decesion you make, best of luck. :)
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DaliciaLynn

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Posted: 01-30-06 23:53pm

Fatfamily, can you make one doing it post without the word god in it?

Your freakin' obsessed.
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michelle1981

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Posted: 01-31-06 00:25am

Please make this decision for you and your baby. Not for anyone else...... Including god! You have to live with it..... Nobody else will.

Best of luck!
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fatfamily02

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Posted: 01-31-06 02:22am

dalicialynn wrote:
fatfamily, can you make one doing it post without the word god in it?


Your freakin' obsessed.



can you make .One post without .Hate in it, what is your problem with me?? You are the one .O.B.S.E.S.S.E.D with trying to make every one as miserable as you!!! Sorry it wont work here. .God bless you, in .Jesus name
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