Sexual Health - Men Forum - My Boyfriend Is Impotent

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Q: My Boyfriend Is Impotent

asked by: ABitFedUp on January 19th, 2006

New User

Can any of you guys advise me? My partner is 47 and has had an inactive sex life for over 20 years as his wife wasnt interested, neither was his last girlfriend, he masturbates but finds it takes twice as long and he has to work twice as hard to reach orgasm as when he was younger. He had no probs before his marriage.
When we try to have sex I can get him turned on but he loses it as soon as he tries to enter me, he got viagra from doctor but twice we've tried it and both times he got an erection but again he lost it as soon as we tried intercourse.
I think it may be psychological but could it be a case of not having proper sex for so many years? Also he has put on weight and is unfit.
I am getting quite fed up, he is happy just to give me oral, which although I appreciate isnt the same as making love!. Weve been together 3 months.
Someone suggested a few drinks along with the viagra but he wont try this as he reckons alcohol will make it worse. Help -any advice greatly appreciated.

Replies(6)

ED209

replied on January 21st, 2006

New User

My advice (based on my limited knowledge & research following my problem) would be to not even try & have penetrative sex every time. Build up to it. That's what I keep reading. Concentrate on pleasuring each other in different ways without the sole aim being to get aroused enough for full sex. You partner has been out of practice for a long time so I guess it's not suprising he's having trouble kick starting things.

I've just bought this good little pocket size tantric sex book. In there it says that in western culture we place to much emphasis on penetration being the ultimate goal of sex. That struck me as I think it's a pretty accurate statement. Some good stuff in here that might help. But you will have to gt your bloke involved & work together. That's what it's all about :)

czarg

replied on January 22nd, 2006

Experienced User

Do Work Outs.

Let him work out more and get some energy. Put his mind off sex and more on exercises. He will improve.

I suppose so.

cd998776

replied on January 22nd, 2006

Active User, very eHealthy

A good diet (like czarg said) and exercise will always help...

Lok1

replied on January 28th, 2006

New User

Re: My Boyfriend Is Impotent

I have exactly the same problem. Sex is not nearly enjoyable as before, and it is much more difficult for me.

I still have the urge to masturbate, but erections are difficult to maintain and sexual stimulation like pornography doesn't turn me on as much as it used to.

I've had only 2 days of good sex in the past few months, when there was a sexual feeling 'breakthrough'.

I have put on a lot of weight over the past year too. I'm about 2 and half stones heavier than last year. So that would seem to be the common factor. But would losing weight guarantee success?

ergit

replied on January 28th, 2006

New User

20 years??? How do u live man??

rob_uk

replied on January 29th, 2006

New User

Ergit, i've been reading through these posts and im wondering why you come on here? All you seem to do is make witty comments about peoples serious health problems. Think about what people might be going through before you make such comments. No one would wish an illness on you but it may take that for you to realise that comments like yours effect people when theyre in situations as they are on this site.

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