A person lives with her biological parents
and brother. Her parents doted on her and
give care to her more than average
parents. She gets what she wants. She
has no burden. She has no family
responsibilities, such as cooking,
cleaning. Her parents give her a lot of
attention, more than she needed. Her
parents always help her when she has a
problem and even if she doesn't tell her
parents about it, they will ask her. Her
parents always able to tell by the look on
her face that she has a problem. She
never felt that they didn't care for her
or left-out. She has never been
neglected, abused, raped, or beaten by
them. So why does she hate her family and
resent them? She never wants to be part
of the family. She would come home from
school and close the door to her room and
be in her own world. She is very
compassionate towards her friends and
boyfriend though. She has been like that
ever since 12, a few weeks after she
entered junior high school and now 26
still like that. Growing up she has never
been in trouble nor had detention in
school, but doesn't always study hard and
get good grades. It seems that all she
needed are the type of parents that comes
home once a week and drop enough money on
the table for her to spend for the week
and go back to work. Why are people like
that? What actually happened? What type
of a person is she? Good or bad?
|
mindoculus
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 20 Dec 2005 Posts: 17 Location: new york city
Posted: 01-17-06 11:20am
Parenting involves more than the absence
of any obvious abuse and providing for
material needs.
A clue may lie in the word 'dote'.
Uncritical parenting is not nurturing and
can produce children (and adults) who are
emotionally disconnected.
On top of this, her parents may have
issues that you simply are not trained to
detect but which your friend may have
absorbed over the years.
Children are very sensitive recorders.
They can't intellectually make heads or
tails of the experiences they undergo, but
they do retain the effects of these
formative processes. The memories may be
buried but the behaviors manifested from
them are present for you to observe. This
is the evidence of past deficiencies and a
possible rout for future help.
