Wow you were taking 90 mg a day for 5 years? That seems like a very high dosage, the average adult dosage is around 60 mg and that seems fairly high to me. Well as you may know adderall contain amphetamines which are highly addictive so the severe depression and thoughts of suicide can be directly related to the acute withdrawal from the substance. It is very common to have bouts of depression after halting the use of such an addictive drug. I support your decision in trying to remove your-self from such a harsh stimulant. One question though what made you choose to stop taking the medication?

Hope this can help,
kword