Why Am I Doing This?[sleep Problem Keeping Me Awake]

I have noticed a pattern that I keep doing, yet I can't control it.

After a weekend, and come sunday night I get a few hours sleep. I'll lay down and just sit there watching tv. I know that half of the problem may be the television, but I have grown up always sleeping with that, or the radio, if the television is off, I have a hard time sleeping. If the radio is off, I have a hard time sleeping. If I can't find something good and interesting on tv or the radio, I get aggravated and don't sleep. ---i haven't really had a sleep problem like this one until about 4 months ago.

So on sunday I go down and get ready to sleep --usually around 10:30-11:00. I sit there and think to myself "what if I don't sleep tonight?" I stay up, not really fighting sleep or trying to sleep, if I get tired and close my eyes, then I sleep, but only if that happens. I will just sit there and watch the television until that point happens. Then, come say 2:00 or sometimes 3:00 I contemplate if sleeping is even worth it, because if I stay up, I won't feel as bad come morning when I have to wake up -i get up at 7.

I have tried to sleep, but I close my eyes and something just forces me to push them open. I really don't get it and it confuses the crap outta me.

This will only happen if I get a good nights sleep -which is on weekends because of no school so that means I don't have a set time to wake up which allows me to sleep in until whatever.

So when I have full rest I am able to stay up until 4:00. I usually stay awake on weekends until 3:00, because I view sleeping early as a wasted day, or more importantly, a wasted night. I have gone by this little belief since I was around 13. Not until recently have I integrated that into my school week life.

I have always stayed up until 3 o'clock and never experienced problems going to bed the next day.

Now, I sit up until my eyes just close, even if I want to sleep I can't.

I try to sleep but I get even more angry trying to sleep because it is always in vain. After a while I have to just stand up and sit at the computer and take a break from trying to sleep. Then I got back and try it again. Around the hours of 2-4 I will finally go to sleep.

The problem I have also found is while I hate doing it the night it is happening[staying up too late], I like what happens in the day. In school I can escape from my classes because I don't pay attention. Not literally escape, but in my mind. I will day dream, the world around me is silent. The entire morning, which is filled with my boring classes, this is an escape I welcome and don't fight away[trying to pay attention]. I go in and out of paying attention.

I have been daignosed with add but I don't take meds for it. I used to, but I wanted to be headstrong and overcome it without the help of medication. It has worked well and slowly, every year my grades pull up a little more than they did the last. This year is my highest gpa, even with my sleeping problem.

After the morning hours I start to 'wake up' and just feel slightely tired due to my lack of sleep. I function normally after the morning hours and pay attention more than I would in the morning.

I'm very confused, my mind is telling me to do one thing, yet I want to do something else, I just can't. As a teen you're supposed to get 7-8 hours of sleep, or so i'm told. I haven't gotten anywhere close to that in the past two days I believe I have only gotten 10 hours of sleep combining the two days together.

A few nights I will acutally go to sleep for about 10-15 minutes, but wake up again and feel very hot and sweaty, then I fight with going back to sleep like usual.


I'm not too sure how you can help me here, because any sleep tips you give me i'll try for a few minutes then drop the method when I notice i'm trying to sleep.

I wake up in the mornings feeling unfulfilled and restless.

Please, even if it is a tip for sleeping, I just want to hear something before this problem exacerbates.