i'm 22 years old.
I now have a new girlfriend, and I have tried to have sex with her,
the first time we've tried I was constantly thinking about my erection,
and just couldn't get it hard (no matter what).
It got me seriously frustrated, so the second time I took 25mg of viagra,
it gave me some more confidence so I did get an erection during the fore play, but once i've put on a condom and was about to penetrate her, the erection simply dissappeared, I think that it's because I began thinking about it again.
I'm aware that thinking about an erection makes it dissappear, but once it has dissapeared, I just can't take it for granted, and can't help thinking about it. I can manage to relax and have an erection during fore play, but the very act of puting on a condom and thinking about having sex makes me think about it and worry about it, which eventually makes my penis soft...
I could really use any suggestion about breaking out of this vicious cycle...
Hey bro I know the feeling, and your right.. Thinking and worrying about it will just make matters worse.
I hope you girlfriend is understanding to situation. Its even more difficult if she becomes frustrated or upset. Sometimes it can make girls feel like there not good enough. Just reassure her about her body and sexuality and that may help you too.
Do you drink ?. If so try having a beer or any light alcoholic beverage with her before hand. This well relax you more than you realise, but don't have to much, you don't want the undesired effect.
After a few times of it all working out your confidence will be boosted and it should no longer be a problem.
P's: maintain a healthy diet, a poor diet can often contribute to a lack in performance. And keep your hands of it - abstain from masturbation and this should also help you get aroused.
Stop thinking about it. Have fun with her, do something that turns you on like eat her out, play with her whatever. But dont worry about yourself. Focus only on her pleasure and dont even bother with yourself. It may even take practise to break old habbits with confidance, but keep relaxing and get into the groove of making sex a relaxing fun thing to do. Make sure youre enjoying it man, I think thats key.
Find something and focus on it like her tits. Thats just my personal fav coz my girls got hotties!
Also, yea condoms kill the fun. But you just have to get that thing on quick, stroke it a bit and get it in there. What I do is open it up get it all out so I know which is the right way on, and then get with fore play. When were ready just forget that you dont like condoms! But bro I can almost promise that there's nothing wrong with you besides what's in your head. You have to shake the frustration.
I find that, the longer you mess around before you get right into the poking, the better your errection will be. Maybe its just me but probably not. Good luck bruuh