Don't you want to learn to be independent? I understand that you want to stay home with your child(ren), but do you honestly want to be on "welfare" for the rest of your life?

Do you have any passion for anything else than staying at home? What do you enjoy? Computers, photography.. Etc. You could pick up a course and receive a certificate in something so when you really have to get a job, you could get into something you enjoy and not "just a store job".

Best of luck with whatever you do :)

I really think you should go back to school...If you didnt like child care ...Then try something different im sure there is something you can find that you like...Your a major influence on your daughter...Do you want her growing up thinking that living off the government is alright...Or would you like her to grow up and make the right choices and make her own money...And another thing ...What if one day the government decides to take all these things away from you....What would you do?....There are a lot of things to look at that are wrong...I dont really think there is one thing you are doing right by living off the government...So I think you need to start off clean and go back to school....

You want to have another baby so you can continue to mooch off the government? That's ridiculous.

You couldn't even provide financially for your first child, so obviously the smart thing to do is to go out and have another!! Wow, einstein here.

Get real hun. You need to get a damn job, not pop out babies so that you can sit on your ass sucking up welfare for the rest of your life just because you don't want to work.
:roll:

....Ding ding ding...Jack pot...!! Lol

I have no problem with mom wanting to stay at home full time but what you said is wrong, like what you will just have another child for money that is so wrong, you are merely saying money is more important than love. Im getting money from the government right now for mat leave but I paid into it and im going back to work in a few months.

Thats one reason, another is I love babies I want to raise a second child, my 3rd reason is I want my daughter to have a sibling to grow up with and play with etc. If I was married to her father, he would work i'd be fulltime stay home mum as many here are I reckon. Just because I dont have him around isnt stopping me from being that!!! Why should I let it when its best for my daughter!!! Michelle im interested in nutrition and animals, doesnt mean I wanna work in those fields of interest. Im not the studying type. There's a guy keeps asking me out im going to give him my phone number this week if I dont chicken out!!! Hes not the kind of guy I wanna be with long term thats for sure!!! Having a baby with him doesnt mean I have to stay with him, for the babys sake I can try to keep him in our lives so he sees the baby. Im not waiting until mr right may or may not walk into my life to have another kid, I could be incredibly 50 by the time that happens!!! I was thinking have baby then after 2yrs get part time store job or study somethin!!! Wish me look giving my number to this guy this week!!! Laterz

So your just looking for a sperm donor, I feel bad for the guys life your going to ruin and I hope he pulls custody from you.....


Im trying not to be rude here but your not doing anything for your children everything is for your selfish needs and it just sickens me, I have a child and another one but I work so I can show my children a good influence even if I end up part time I want them to grasp resposibility. You want money while sitting on doesnt happen wake up and smell the coffee, you have to work for respect and money.

You're being ridiculous, and above all selfish.

You are a horrible mother. You don't care about your child. You don't care about the father. You don't care about anyone around you but yourself. Don't even bother trying to say you're doing it for your daughter. How would having another child that's going to take all your time and energy away from her helping her?

You're "not the studying type"? So in other words you're a slacker. Great example to set for your daughter. You know what? I hate school with a passion too. But I do it. I'm going to college as soon as possible even though I hate hate hate it because I know I have to, for my child. And for myself. We both deserve that.

Despite what you think, you can't simply spermjack a guy and then ditch him. He has every legal right to that child and he may very well exercise those rights. Suddenly you're stuck with a guy who's taking your child half the week and every decision has to be agreed upon by him. In fact, I think it's likely that he could get full custody of the child based on how crappy and selfish of a mother you are.

You're disgusting. Have a nice life getting knocked up by another 12 guys and living off welfare and raising your children to be as fat, lazy and ugly as you are.

I agree.
That is completely selfish of you to take advantage of welfare, and bring another child into the world so you can do it. You are not in the situation to have another child! The way you're acting, you sound like you're a child yourself, regardless of your age.
Plus, I don't think any guy is going to be too eager to respond to this:
"hey, I have a three year old daughter, and I want another kid now so I can take advantage of the fact that you're working and stay at home to raise the children! Then, when our welfare runs out, we'll pop out another baby!"
honestly. You need a serious and bracing reality check, sweetie. Be a little bit mature, and don't go for the easy way. Get a job. Go to school. Get a life.
Sorry in advance if you take offence by this. I'm speaking my mind.

Welfare is there to help people, to help people get back on their feet, I dont think its wrong to go on welfare there are a lot of cases thats its justified and yours isnt. People who work are the ones paying for your welfare and id rather see it go to ppl who actually need it, where I live you have to do community service I believe its 20-40 hrs amonth to collect it depending on the person circumstances.

You really need to get a life, a good mother teachers their children good moral and ur just not doing that, im 22 not much older than you and I have everything that I wanted and could have more should I go back to college. You need to think about your future you really do and your childs futur how are you going to help them when they need extra cash for school or just anything that a child needs no one ever said kids were cheap. What man wants to marry a woman that has no respect for her family like honestly yeah im married its not easy buts its nice to know you have someone to fall back on and someone you can get a hug from after a hard days work or just to b$%ch at lol!!

You need help ur not thinking with the right frame of mind about life, life is supposed to be hard but the benefits and joys you get you could never buy and you will never expierence them till you actually something worth while.

Sorry for the long post but you need to think!
Jess

I also from england n think your mad so within a year u wana meet a bloke get pregnant n then ave him as ya fella so u no him two months b4 u start trying.. U cnt decide that quick if hes trusted with your lil girl or a new baby your still young sort u out, go college n you wont lose any benefits n u can train n be home in time for your lil girl n be a good mum when shes older n wants nice £100 nike trainers you need a job.More then a supermarket n u wont b happy ull regret it all wish you stidied if that what you want go 4 it good luck but f**k anova bloke sort you out

If I was on welfare, the last thing that would be on my mind is another child to support.

I'm not going to go the route of telling you its dumb. I just think your motives are good - (being a stay at home mom) - but you should want to better yourself. Go to school, so you can get a good job, and then your child will be in school while you work, you can still be at home with her in the evenings, and on the weekends. It the right thing to do to teach her some values. Be independent! Be a good rolemodel for your daughter!

:x :?: I honestly believe that you are being ridiculous!!! You are being selfish,lazy, and ignorant. Your child is going to grow up thinking that she won't ever have to work for caca because the government is just going to give it to her. Girl you better wake up and smell the coffee, cuz life comes at you fast and all of that "assisstance" can be taken away tommorrow. It's sounds like your abusing welfare and why should working citizens like myself have to pay for your lazy ass. You need to think again. You are only hurting yourself.

Right I aint abusing welfare which I call benefits cos im in uk. I got a right to claim it cos im a single mum. My girl is too young to be in proper school for another year and 8 months. Meaning I have to not work so I can be home raising her everyday, no one else is around to look after her for me even if I wanna work part time!!! Yes I could stick her in daycare centre all day which government help pay for, so I can work fulltime or part time, yet I dont want strangers raising my kid especially being young. Whats point having your baby if you aint gonna look after them only at night??? No daycare place is raising my kid for me, I gave birth to her so I will be the one to care for her!!! Would suck having her in daycare all day so I could only see her in the evening for an hour or 2 before she goes to bed no way!!! Im a good mum I do everything for her that she needs and more, from getting up early everyday to give her breakfast, to taking her swimming every week, to the park, grocery shopping, clothes and toys books shopping, mum and toddler playgroup every week, take her to pre-school twice a week and pick her up, take her to visit family, to the library she loves it there, cook her dinner every night, bathe her, read to her, play with her a lot, take her for walks, help her ride her lil bike, talk to her, watch kids dvd's with her, dress her, brush her teeth twice a day, get activity sets out for drawing, painting, coloring, play doh, puzzles.........................All that stuff!!! Different things every day, so dont you tell me im lazy or fat sitting on my ass all damn day cos I aint!!! Im a great mum, my daughter is happy, healthy, intelligent, energetic, well adjusted, confidant, loving and loved!!! Being stay home mum is best thing I can do for her right now and im glad I am!!!
The issue is when it comes to next year september when she starts proper school fulltime, what should I do? Study something at night while shes sleeping, and also work part time during the day for a few hours in a store while shes at school. Good idea? Thats what I been thinkin of doing lately, I do wanna have another baby too which is always on my mind, cos she should have a sibling to grow up with in my opinion all kids should. And I love being a mum!!! I want another but do I have another first then study and work later or first or what. Plz reply your views???

Ok, I don't doubt that you love your daughter and want nothing but the best for her. It's obvious that you love her and love spending time with her. Nobody is questioning that. What strikes me as odd is the fact that you say you want another baby so you can continue getting government assistance, and you don't care if the dad is involved the least bit. Girl, you're still very young and have the rest of your life to give your daughter a sibling. Do it the right way, though. Find a guy who you can fall in love with, get married, and then have a family with him. Don't just look for a sperm donor. It's not fair to the baby, and it's especially not fair to your daughter. Do you want to have 5 kids with 5 different guys?

I understand why you don't want your daughter in daycare. There are freaks out there, but for the most part daycare is a very positive environment for your daughter. It will give her a chance to interact with kids her age. I know she attends pre-school a couple days a week, but daycare gives kids the chance to be more comfortable and more social outside of their homes. But if you absolutely don't want to put her in daycare, then I suggest when she is in school full-time that you get a job and/or go back to school. I know you like staying at home with her, but when the government stops supporting you, what are you going to live off of? Many women would be perfectly happy being a stay-at-home mom for a living, but unfortunately that's not an option for you. You don't have a husband to support you, and i'm pretty sure your family isn't going to support you either. So buck up, get a job, and provide for your daughter. She deserves it.

:o I apologize for offending you because that was not my intention, it just angered me when that you were thinking about having another child so that you could continue to recieve government assisstance regardless to whether or not the father was around. I just didn't understand why someone would want to do that. I am quite sure that you are an excellent mother.

I think you should do a bit of college 1st wait a year until shes full time school b4 you ave anova baby. Den you also get a yrs worth of training up ya sleeve. Even hairdressing you can do that from home n all the colleges other that course for a couple of evenings a week do that 4 a yr till she full time n if you meet a bloke now that give you ova a year to decide if hes good enuff 2 father a kid of yours and be around ya girl.

An its easier on you if your girl at school b4 anova ones here you can teach her more about responsibility with helping you an stuff you get more time for just you an the baby and wen shes home shes greeted by you all calm n happy rather then 2kids nagging at you all day it works out better for everyone n if you really need all da benefits you can do hairdressin mobile buissness n still claim if u need to you need time 4 u no kids no man no housework just chill time from what I cn tell ya a gd mum you just need to f**k men for a while and sort ya education out n giv ya girl evewn more of wot u already given her

let me no if ne of dis helps ya

lydia (bumpycow :roll: )

You do what you do to survive and i'm much in the same situation as you are but it's pretty ridiculous that you still seem to be seriously considering having another child. I'd love another one sure, I agree that I think it's important for kids to have siblings. But I know i'm nowhere in the situation to have another one. Sure I could get on welfare and suck it up just so that I could be selfish and have another child that I couldn't support by myself and make everyone else pay for them...But that's wrong. If you can't support them on your own, you shouldn't have them.

Even more is the idea that you don't care about your child having a father. That's unebelievable. Haven't you read anything about the problems kids have when there's no father involved? I grew up with pretty much no father there it wasn't fun. I sure as hell would't purposly set out to have another child and not try and give it the best life possible...That means trying my damndest that it has two parents involved.

Use some common sense. Focus on getting your daughter in daycare and getting a job. She's 3, that's not exactly too young. My son is only 1 and i'm already looking at my options for finishing school and getting a job. People would've killed me if I was still sitting around 2 years from now.