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Making Up Stories?

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Is is common for someone that is bipolar to make stuff up all of the time? My ex keeps e-mailing me and he doesn't make any sense and his stories are not adding up at all! For example; first he told me that he is quitting his job for now and that his girlfriend that he has been with for 4 months is going to support him by her still working during that time. He also said that he is also going to marry her next month and get on her health insurance. (he has told me over and over that he never wants to get married) he said he was going to a doctor for his bipolar disorder at the mayo clinic. He said since he would be out of town and not working and that he couldn't pay me child support.

Ok, then he e-mails me a few hours later and said that they talked it over and he is not going to the mayo clinic at all and is staying in town here and will still be working and just go to a doctor here.

Then the next day he e-mails me again and tells me that he sorry for saying some of the things he has been saying to me (we were arguing about stuff) and that he has a lot going on right now with his girlfriend. He said that she has serious health issues and they are waiting to hear from her doctors. He made it sound like it wasn't good, and he did ask me a couple of weeks ago the name of the surgeon that operated on my dad when he had colon cancer. He wouldn't tell me why at the time.

Now, does this make any sense?? First she is going to be working to support him and then the next day he says her health isn't good?Also, I happen to know that he is still looking for women to date (i have proof), yet he told me he was getting married next month! He does stuff like this all of the time and did the whole 5 years we dated too. Things never add up. Is this common with bipolar or is it maybe something he has along with it? I have thought that he may possibly have borderline personality disorder, but he has never been diagnosed with it. It is just so strange.
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replied December 30th, 2005
Your boyfriend seems to not know what he wants and keeps swaping and changing his mind. As a sufferer myself from this illness I often do what hes doing, but I dont know whether or not its just a personality thing, or if its the illness itself. One minute I want one thing but the next day I want something completly different, or I dont know wht I want and regret saying things I said I wanted which I dont (hope that makes sense). Sounds like from reading your post hes sort of similar.
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replied January 1st, 2006
Experienced User
Yeah, he goes back and forth on things too. I am not talking about that though. I am talking about making stuff up and not making sense. Nothing he says adds up.
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replied January 1st, 2006
Re: Making Up Stories?
liz26 wrote:
is is common for someone that is bipolar to make stuff up all of the time? My ex keeps e-mailing me and he doesn't make any sense and his stories are not adding up at all! For example; first he told me that he is quitting his job for now and that his girlfriend that he has been with for 4 months is going to support him by her still working during that time. He also said that he is also going to marry her next month and get on her health insurance. (he has told me over and over that he never wants to get married) he said he was going to a doctor for his bipolar disorder at the mayo clinic. He said since he would be out of town and not working and that he couldn't pay me child support.


Ok, then he e-mails me a few hours later and said that they talked it over and he is not going to the mayo clinic at all and is staying in town here and will still be working and just go to a doctor here.


Then the next day he e-mails me again and tells me that he sorry for saying some of the things he has been saying to me (we were arguing about stuff) and that he has a lot going on right now with his girlfriend. He said that she has serious health issues and they are waiting to hear from her doctors. He made it sound like it wasn't good, and he did ask me a couple of weeks ago the name of the surgeon that operated on my dad when he had colon cancer. He wouldn't tell me why at the time.


Now, does this make any sense?? First she is going to be working to support him and then the next day he says her health isn't good?Also, I happen to know that he is still looking for women to date (i have proof), yet he told me he was getting married next month! He does stuff like this all of the time and did the whole 5 years we dated too. Things never add up. Is this common with bipolar or is it maybe something he has along with it? I have thought that he may possibly have borderline personality disorder, but he has never been diagnosed with it. It is just so strange.


i am not one that has been diagonsed with being bipolar, but know a good many who are. From what I have seen from those who have bipolar, they all swing back and forth - kind of like in a confused state all the time. It is like yes, and then no, and then well they don't know. It can really be confusing to just talk with them on a day to day basis.
As for your ex, I wouldn't take much of what he says to heart. It is obvious that he is in that change of mind mode and in all reality has no idea what is what.
I will say that some people that I know that are bipolar, do a lot better once they are getting help for it. Getting medications to help with the change of thought process and going to therapy and all does seem to take some of that confusion away from some.
If I were you, I would try and get him in to see a therapist and put on some medications to try and help with him being in this confusion period. Anymore, even if one does not have insurance something can be arranged so that people can still get help for such disorders.
I am not a doctor or anything of the sort, but that is what I would do if I were you I do believe.
Take care.
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replied January 11th, 2011
Bipolar?
A daughter of a friend has a bad marriage. But she stays. They don't pay their bills and they move all the time. She says she's "paid up", but then we hear from the bill collector looking for them, like within days. She boldly announced on Facebook that she is leaving her husband! For everyone to see. Then she sent a private message saying that she needed help to move within a week, because he was out of town & didn't want him to know. She said all the bills were paid, and she would pay next week? She also said husband would not send her any money, yet she doesn't have any income yet. Exactly! Next day she takes the posts off Facebook and sends me a text saying, "I don't need help, I have a plan". That night she posts on Facebook saying "I sure miss my husband". He is back "in town", but she said she had to move within a week before he "came back". Once again, the bank is calling about the car payments and trying to repossess. This is on-going. 8 moves in 2 years. She needed Money to pay off school, or it would "all be for nothing"?????yet she got her license and started a job. It's endless. The stories make no sense, and they change from day to day. I think it's bipolar and/or some kind of drug and alcohol use. The she tells me, don't say anything on Facebook!!! And pretends she has no clue when everyone asks what is going on ????????????????
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replied January 11th, 2011
Bipolar?
A daughter of a friend has a bad marriage. But she stays. They don't pay their bills and they move all the time. She says she's "paid up", but then we hear from the bill collector looking for them, like within days. She boldly announced on Facebook that she is leaving her husband! For everyone to see. Then she sent a private message saying that she needed help to move within a week, because he was out of town & didn't want him to know. She said all the bills were paid, and she would pay next week? She also said husband would not send her any money, yet she doesn't have any income yet. Exactly! Next day she takes the posts off Facebook and sends me a text saying, "I don't need help, I have a plan". That night she posts on Facebook saying "I sure miss my husband". He is back "in town", but she said she had to move within a week before he "came back". Once again, the bank is calling about the car payments and trying to repossess. This is on-going. 8 moves in 2 years. She needed Money to pay off school, or it would "all be for nothing"?????yet she got her license and started a job. It's endless. The stories make no sense, and they change from day to day. I think it's bipolar and/or some kind of drug and alcohol use. The she tells me, don't say anything on Facebook!!! And pretends she has no clue when everyone asks what is going on ????????????????
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replied January 14th, 2011
Experienced User
oh my. my boyfriend also does this, we are not 100 % sure he is bP, but Im getting there fast.
He wrote dozens of emails to me while I was away saying how much he missed me , things like'come back soon, I miss you' and 'we cannot live apart, Im waiting for you', and 'I miss you so much', and now that Im back even though he is treating me like a real boyfriend would he is saying he does not love me and that his feelings for me are like for a sister. SOME SISTER!!!! he booked a hotel room for us, was very loving to me, and now comes with that one.
He also lied to me about other matters, for ex, some time ago we broke up and he told me he went out with a woman during that time, afterwards told me it was a complete invention, after that told me that she exists but as a friend, I do not know what to believe any more.
he lies and makes stories all the time, about what he can do also, pretends he knows things he does not know.
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replied January 17th, 2011
Experienced User
Same here....the person I was involved with lied on a regular basis. It seems to go hand and hand with the disorder from what I have researched/observed. The funny thing....I knew she was lying when she did it. She really thought she was cunning and sneaky however it was just the opposite. For some who has this illness.....they truly live in their own world/reality. Additionally they seem to never make up their mind or have the ability to make a lasting decision. Over a 2.5 year period...she left me over 19 times. She told me she loved me on many occasions but would also tell me she didn't love me. These are all symptoms of Bipolar/Borderline personality Disorder.

Chris
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replied July 1st, 2011
Experienced User
Im now goig through another of his bouts of 'I dont love you'. This has been going on for some time, but he will be back on that as well, he starts missing me and asking to see me.He can tell fibs like no other as well, his lies are so transparent, easy to see they are lies.I decided now that I cannot live with this anylonger.I think he is seeing someone and he denies it.I phoned him and heard a womans voice and he was talking to someone, when he realized it was me he became really embarassed and odd, asking things he knows the answer, trying to end the phone call, saying he was only in the bus stop, leaving work at 9 in the morning (he works nights)but who was the woman and who was he talking to. he told me he is alone and insists on it, but I dont believe. Anyway, he will get tired of whoever is with him soon, he cannot go on too long without showing his fangs and either she will go or he will leave, and guess who is going to look for... but i wont be available anymore.
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replied July 1st, 2011
Experienced User
Reggiane.....I am so happy you are making the decision to end it. Be strong hon....you will find someone who can love you the way you deserve!

Chris
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replied August 22nd, 2013
For an analytical person to try and make sense of this behavior will drive you insane..trust me. Been going through this for 2 years and just ended things. I still am baffled by it all. It hurts and even though you know it is part of the illness you can't help but take it personally. It is personal. It seems the cut off or disconnect comes at a time when you are just becoming closer. It's a complete 180. I refuse to try and make sense of it anymore. Time to move on.....
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