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Strabismus: What to Do? I Feel Kinda Down. (Page 1)

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Hey,

when I fast little the eye doctor advised me to follow a few sessions at an orthoptist to learn how to use both eyes simulatenously. Presumably my eyes weren't drastic enough to proceede instant eye correction through surgery. So I did, untill about the age of 8 I think.

The next following years I didn't have that much trouble with my eyes. I could see well without my eyes wandering off too much. Yet, when I was around 16 I started having this feeling my eyes were changing. I noticed my left eye was moving inwards alot when I looked at things. I began to have trouble fixating my eyes on a certain objects, I began to have constant headachs every day and at that time I didn't know why. I couldn't look peoples in the eyes, not of shyness, but because it hurted so much. I was actually kind of shy telling my parents about this and i've only told them this year. I didn't tell them earlier, because I was insecure of myself, and I didn't exactly know what the problem with my eyes was.

A few times we went back to the eye doctor for a check up, and all the time he told me I just needed different glasses. Couldn't he have just seen what was wrong with me? Maybe if he observed better he could have spared alot of akward years.This is the same eye doctor who advised me not to have surgery when I was little, so I kind of blame him for some of it. ( if that even makes sense).

Well...I'm 18 now, starting my life as an adult, but I have so much trouble begining my journey when I feel so limited in life, and abondonned by these eyes. I started college in september, went for a month, but I could hardly concentrate and adapt to my surroundings. I stopped going after a month, because I felt so unhappy and pessimistic. I had trouble studying and concentrating, because I couldn't focuss on anything else but my eyes. And still can't...

I finally broke down and told my older brother about the problem I was having all these years, and why I felt bad about myself, and life and cried it out on his shoulder. He then told my mother. I told my mom that the reason why I was down when I came out of school was because of my eyes, and not because I didn't like going to school. I practically also shut off my social life, though I still had friends at school, I just didn't go out anywhere with them after school. It's like no one seemed to know what was wrong with me, because I was too sealed.

So...In november I went to a few orthoptists to see if I could reactivate a nerve to use both of my eyes together. Those tests didn't work well, and they only gave me headachs (you know those kind of tests right?). It also appeared I actually only use one eye when I look (which would explain why the other eye doesn't stay in the center). This is a thing my eye doctor never told me, and I really angers me off that a man of his status didn't know or care to tell me about it!

After these failed attempts I was adviced to go to a doctor who's an expert on strabismus. Thus, I went there asap( don't you just hate waiting so long for something so important? I know I do.) after I think 2 visits, they also confirmed that correcting or 'improving' my eyes through orthoptistic exercises wouldn't help. Then the docor ( it's a she by the way) gave me prisms for one glass as a test to see if an operation would work. But I had a lot of trouble seeing good with it. It felt weird, and gave me headachs, and normally you should feel comfortable with them. I was really ticked off, because I hoped this would work, but it made me feel more akward.

At the moment i've blocked my left eye's glasses so I don't have shitty headachs when I watch tv and stuff. It looks kinda stupid, and it doesn't feel very comfortable, but atleast it makes feel a bit better. What hurts me, is that i'm not unatractive in the least and my eye problem is holding me back from enjoying my life, going out, dating, studying etc.

I know it will be nigh on impossible to have two perfect eyes, but I just want a stable social life you know. I want to look peoples in the eyes without it hurting, or feeling embarrassed. This is holding me back. I wish I could just have a cosmetic surgery on my left eye ( it's the one that goes inwards alot) so that it just appears normally, even though i'm actually looking with one eye mostly.

Anyone relate to this? Can anyone help me out? Anyone have any tips?

I really needed to get this of my chest! Thanks.
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replied March 14th, 2006
Cosmetic surgery isnt' gonna fix an eye. If ur eye turns in, see another doc about botox shots first (realize u r awake for this procedure... U have to look straight ahead while that needle goes into your eye and u have to be still! So get urself prepared)

eye surgeries suck when u r young. Go back to college... Don't be afraid to ask for help. Get large print books, tests, etc and don't give up!

I had to deal with the same crap in college... Eye surgeries and feeling bummed. The best thing about college tho is that a lot of kids don't really care cuz they are too busy partying or studying.

Get busy also... Get yourself a million jobs or hobbies. At the time of my eye surgeries, I was juggling over four jobs and I joined two frats... I don't think I slept for a month. Idle hands are bad if u r a thinker.
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replied December 29th, 2007
Man your story sounds EXACTLY like mine. I have the same condition where i only use one eye at a time. When that eye gets tired after any kind of strain (computer, TV, reading, etc...) the other will start to turn slightly inwards. Although i have rarely ever heard anyone say something about it, i can't help but feel imperfect and iferior. It has really affected my social life and i often wonder how things would have turned out for me if i didn't have this defect and were able to be more sociable with others Sad I am 23 now and still haven't learned to accept my strabismus. I know that the day i am able to just accept this and not care what others think about me i'll trully be free! Good luck to you and keep us posted on any new progress with your strabismus Smile
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replied December 5th, 2008
Botox!!!!
To ex48er, You mentioned in here along time ago now about botox shots. I had eye surgery on my left eye due to it turning outwards after surgery now it turns inwards. My doctor says botox injections is something to try however im concerned its something im gonna have to keep having to be able to have a straight eye. How many injections did you have and is your eye perfect now. Or if anyone else has had botox injections please let me know. i would love to read any feedback!!!
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replied July 7th, 2009
I suffer from intermittent strabismus in my right eye. I believe it is called exotropia (the eye turns out).

I am in dental school and are just realising that I won't be able to continue. I visited a behavioural optometrist at the start of the year and have begun vision therapy. He is the best in New Zealand from what I can tell. But from he has said, even with the most dedicated eye exercises and training for stereopsis I probably will always never be as good as the normal person at depth perception. For dentistry you need the best depth perception and coordination- so I am screwd. I feel like shet.

I know want to apply to optometry school, which is on the other side of the country and I will be wasting the last year and a half of hard work and money. Plus the emotional stress i went through to gain the marks i did and to keep up in dental school for half a year.

I need to begin a new 3 year science degree to compete to get into optometry school. Its going to be a large loan at the end of it and I will be very old when i come out.

I haven't told my parents, who think everything is fine. My optometrist hasn't told me directly that i wont be able to become a dentist either. I have three more days of holidays before i head back to dental school and hell.

I am turning 20 this year. Anways, that's my story. Youre not alone.
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replied October 24th, 2009
I'm 19, I had strabismus surgery when I was 17 and it almost completly corrected it, but for some reason I began having dry eyes after the surgery. I guess it messed up my tear ducts or something, so that's a pain in the ass but I guess it's better than eyes that drift apart... Sometimes it bothers me that my eyes are a little off so I can relate. Remember this, most people's eye's aren't completly symmetrical, theirs may not drift but they arent perfectly alligned either. Hope that helps.
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replied January 11th, 2010
I'm 14.

Strabismus sucks.

I'll never forget one day in 3rd grade a kid came up to me and said, "What's with your eye? Do you have a lazy eye or something?"

That one line, stuck with me ever since and I'll never forget it.

I've had three surgeries to try and fix it. They worked for a little bit, but it just went back to being weird again. It ruined my social life. I never take pictures because I'm afraid my eyes will be crooked. I'm afraid to look people in the eye, because I'll get a strange look when they see my crossed eyes. I don't even look my own parents in the eyes because I can feel my eyes being mis-aligned. I don't go out in public because I hate the staring.

I really wish I could try surgery one more time. But at my last eye appointment my mom said it would be stupid. But my doctor wanted to try it again. She doesn't realize how much it sucks. I freakin' hate it. I wish I was never born with it. I wish my life would just be normal, for one second..I wish they would stop calling me cross eyed.
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replied June 17th, 2011
That's exactly how I feel. I've had strabismus since I was 2, it sucks and hurts so bad Sad
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replied May 2nd, 2010
Enough is enough
I''m currently suffering with Strabismus and amblyopia, so I feel everyone''s pain. I have been living with it since birth and I''m now 30. It has destroyed my life. All I want is the surgery to correct the alignment...I would chance blindness if I had to.
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replied May 2nd, 2010
I feel everyone's pain...I would love to have my eye turning in (as it once was)...it now turns out giving me completely different double vision.....I'm interested in finding out about BOTOX as well
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replied May 7th, 2010
I am a 21 year old girl...The year the BIG PARTY is supposed to happen...Well, I also have a Strabismus problem ever since i was a baby. I think it is in my genes or something because my dad''s sister also has the same problem, only 10 times as worse.

Someone mentioned that they feel uncomfortable looking someone in the eye. I know EXACTLY what you mean. I hurts when someone notices it and try to pretend as though im normal.(like theyre trying to spare my feelings)

Someone once told me(also) : "damn girl your eyes are crossed"

That sentence has been with me for as long as i can remember, and everytime I hear it in my head, I start to cry all over again.

Most people compliment me and tell me I am "beautiful" and "sexy", but its only because I try SO hard to hide the Strabismus so they dont notice. Every girl( as you should know) wants to hear that she''s pretty. Its human. I even won an eye competition at my modelling agency once for the most beautiful eyes. That confused me a little though?? But after that some people still judged my eyes saying that they are a "lil" crossed.

Its only my right eye that moves a bit more in towards my nose. I have never done ANYTHING whatsoever about it. Do you think its too late to do an operation? I really dont hope so. If i can correct this it will change my whole life, completely.

But reading all of this just made me feel a bit better, because then i realised that im NOT the only one with this problem.

What id also like to know is : Does people with strabismus see correctly or do they see double? Because I see perfectly with both my eyes? Thank God for that. In that way I am truely blessed and thankful for my Maker.

The reason why I am asking this question is because if people with Strabismus see double then maybe I have a different problem?

I really feel sorry for all of you because BELIEVE me i know all the pain you have been through!! And it hurts, allot! I probably never forget all those mean things those people said to me, but hey, if i can correct this problem, at least i know that its fixed.
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replied August 12th, 2010
strabismus
hi everyone.
I've had congenital strabismus bilaterally since i was born. had many surgeiries to correct it and they worked for a little while and as i got older off went my eyes again. I feel all of your pain and embarrasment, I wish I too could just learn to accept it and not care or be effected by what looks pple give me or how they treat me. But its really hard to forget, some days i just stay in my room and cry. Im 27 yrs old now and you'd think I'd be able to deal with it a bit better. Some days Im happy and just do my own thing and dont care about it and other days im so sad I wish I was never born. Why are people so mean? you think only kids are mean but adults are mean too. I go to grad school with pple in their mid 20s and you should see how they treat me. Sometmes I feel like the pple that are friends with me are just friends with me out of pitty. I almost hate it when people call me beautiful bcuz I feel liek theyre just trying to make me feel better. I hate getting so depressed about it, I hate self pitty. I just wish people were nicer and didnt make me feel so inferior. I also dont talk to my parents about it or anyone.. I dont knwo why it just feels weird and embarrasing. Im going to a vision therapist for the first time next week. I hope he has good news for me. I really cant imagine living the rest of my life like this.
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replied August 17th, 2010
Help for strabismus sufferers
hi I can totally relate to all these comments as I have had an in turning eye since I was A baby. im due for my forth surgery next wk had an op in feb of this year but it did not improve the position of my eye, hence this next surgery.Im 31 now and I thought I would of accepted it now but I still get down about it.Probably because of all the nasty comments Ive had over the years.my love goes out to all ppl who suffer with strabismus we are a special kind of ppl because we have had to be stronger and more resiliant than the avrage person and that is not an easy task when ppl are quick to make horrible comments and forget that there one cruel remark can stay with you a lifetime. I urge everyone out there to seek medical advice if they have not already done so as surgery really does improve the apperance of eyes in most cases.
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replied October 22nd, 2010
Strabismus
Im 30 years old now born with strabismus, i had two surgeries and my eyes went back to the way they were.Im really thinking about getting another surgery but im wondering if Im setting myself up for more disappointment. Reading all your comments makes me feel like im not alone and what people need to understand is that this situation can traumatize a person for LIFE!I have this obesssion for just once in my life to take that perfect picture with my eyes STRAIGHT!
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replied June 17th, 2011
I have had strabismus since I was 2. My right eye turns inwards. I've wanted to have surgery ever since but I'm really scared to take this step. Im 20 now and I really can't imagine myself living with this for the rest of my life. Strabismus lowers my self esteem and makes me feel depressed...I so feel your pain, believe me! I just wish there was a chance for all of us to have a normal life, just like everyone else does!!
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replied September 21st, 2011

Vision Therapy will help you all! When I first tried Vision Therapy it didn't work well for me. Years ago my vision therapist wanted me to get surgery. I refused to get surgery. I suffered for many years until I recently adopted and modified my own vision therapy regimen.

Strabismus surgery will make it harder to do vision therapy in the future, so I recommend against it. I am not a professional doctor or anything though. All I know is what I am doing, it's working very well for me.

I know how debilitating this can be. The fatigue and headaches. The social awkwardness. It really does slow you down in life. I used to have straight eyes, until I had LASIK. It was devastating for me.

I will gladly share all my knowledge with anyone who asks. If you have any questions, please do not hesitate to contact me.
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replied December 14th, 2011
I am 48, and have had strabismus all my life. First, I worked on forgiving my parents for knowing I had it, and doing nothing about it when I was young enough for corrective measures to be successful.

I asked for (demanded) surgery when I was 16, and had it again when I was 35. The first surgeon over-corrected, so instead of turning out, my eye turned in. Not good. The 2nd surgery was wonderful, life-changing, amazing--for a year. Then my eyes reverted.

I do all sorts of things to camouflage it, and until I had the 2nd surgery and didn't have to spend all that mental energy on it, I didn't realized how much it affected my daily life.

The negatives: I recall being teased and called "Crossty the Snowman" in 4th grade. I can't look people in the eye. People look behind them to try to figure out who I'm talking to, because they can't tell who I'm looking at. I am much more socially confident when I'm wearing sunglasses. I have to make sure I am turned to the side in pictures, deliberately looking elsewhere, or look through my right eye whenever a picture is being taken of me, so my eyes are more likely to look aligned. I am always wondering when I am talking to people if I am making them uncomfortable because of my strabismus. I know I am, and it makes me very self-conscious.

The positives: My wonderful husband actually once remarked, "I like that newscaster--she's very attractive. I think it's because she reminds me of you--she has an eye that turns a little bit, like yours does."

Last year, I announced to a group of elementary students that I know it is difficult to tell who I am calling on because of my eyes, but that I have had 2 surgeries to correct it, and I'm sorry, but there's nothing I can do about it. The teacher came up to me afterwards and told me what an inspiration I was to her, because she was dealing with eye issues and it was very encouraging to see how I didn't let it interfere with my life (little does she know).

Because of my strabismus, I currently have one eye that is far-sighted and one that is near-sighted. I don't have to wear glasses if I don't want to for this reason--I can drive or read, and choose to use either eye for each. People pay to have Lasik to get this kind of mono vision. I have it for free.

My advice to you all -- don't let it cripple your life by letting it stop you from doing what you want. Yes, it's a difficult handicap to work around, it's misunderstood, and it's not likely going to be fixable once you are an adult, but you are so much more than your eyes lining up.

And yet, I Googled, "How to hide strabismus" this morning, and it led me to this website. Hmmmm.
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replied January 18th, 2012
Strabismus...I feel ur pain
I totally understand what ur saying.i hav that problem.im in 7th grade. Trust me people r so rude. Like I hav a crush on this guy and I'm too afraid to talk to him cuz of my stupid eye. I can't look into anyone's eyes. It makes me feel soo awkward I don't noe what to do. I wish there was a type of contacts that hide my Strabismus eye. I also have amblyopia which makes it worse.., so I'm not confident of myself.... What can I do.????
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replied January 27th, 2012
Strabismus
I'm 18 years old and i have strabismus. i was never diagnosed properly, my first optomitrist simply said, "yes u hav a bit of a squint" but never advised me on how to correct it. my right eye is noticeably bigger than my left and it slants inward and up. it used to be alot worse when i was younger, that one iris was always turned inward almost to the corner. ive been teased in school and up to today i cant have a conversation with a new person without them asking if im looking at them or not.
i am also an aspiring model and this is definitely not a characteristic that would get me far with that. its so noticeable in pictures. sometimes during shoots i think im doing a trick so it wouldnt show up and when i get the pics, boom, its more prominent than ever.
this is definitely ruining my life. its immensely unfair Sad
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replied January 27th, 2012
Sounds terrible, sorry to hear this has been ongoing for so many years. As far as correction options, the only two I've heard of are strabismus surgery and vision therapy. Sometimes, doctors recommend doing both. I'd also like to mention that there are various surgical options, so perhaps you should visit a surgeon who specializes in strabismus.

For a better understanding of your condition, I suggest reading the following article: http://www.allaboutvision.com/conditions/s trabismus.htm.

I hope it helps!
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