Sorry I posted this message for someone else, but it works very well with your question too...

Think of these things when you abort or voluntarily misscarriage that innocent bundle of joy that will have your eyes, your hair, your smile...

Her/his first look at you, first smile, first time he/she makes you laugh, first hug to your breast, first cry, first step, first word, finding out where he/she is ticklish, first dream, first taste of real food, first bath, first dirty diaper, snuggling, the love you two will share, the love he/she will give, hurt and pain that makes all of us grow, laughing, first tantrum, all the toys a little child can play with, first time she plays dress-up with your clothes, or uses mommy's make-up, first time he plays hide-and-seek, or bats a ball, the beautiful moments only you two can share, and the list can go on forever...

You would take that away from your baby? Most times possible mothers don't think about the baby but themselves. After all, what is sacrafice? That's what being a mother and raising children is all about. Don't think being too young will mean you won't have enough love for this child. Is the time for a baby ever right? Young or old. Why don't we take the "bad" cirumstances with the good? Just because a baby doesn't "feel" right or you are too young, doesn't mean things won't work out and you should feel the freedom to take it's life. God does the giving and the taking of lives, not us. We won't grow, mature, and learn from our mistakes. But you are taking away the chance to do so. A child is no mistake or accident. Maybe the reason for this child is to make you grow up (if you are too young). Give you some responsibility. I think that abortion shows we are hiding from our problems and the irresponsibility of handing them off to someone else. Deal with them. Keep the baby. Raise it and give it a good home. I am sure your parents would help you. And be more supportive than you realize.

There are plenty of couples out there that would love to adopt because of their own inability in child bearing. Don't think that abortion will just make everything go back to normal. No one realizes the price you pay when you discard of the baby that lives inside of you. The emotional shreds will never heal. You chose to kill your own life inside of you. They will haunt you everytime you look at a baby. You think how you could have had your very own precious child whether you were sweet 16 or 35. It will never go away. It will make you weep and unforgiving of yourself. Even when you have a child someday when the "time is right" you will still remember the day and the feelings you had from the abortion or voluntary miscarriage.

Well, good luck and hope you make the right decision.

hey! I dont know your whole story why you dont want 2 have this kid you created and you are carrying in ur stomach right now but still atlease you could just have an adoption...Killing ur baby is not the right thing 2 do! There is ppl out in this world who want a baby unlike you...I mean I am 14 and mayb pregnant but still I am going 2 keep my kid and you need 2 think about what you are saying at this time!!! You are the one who had sex and this is ur responsibility and dont have sex if your not ready for everything that comes w/ it...I feel for your baby right now you wanting 2 kill it, just think about it your killing someone and ur going 2 regret it one day! I am not lieing 2 u either ok now please think about what you are saying and mayb going 2 do 2 ur unborn child...(killing your baby is not the best decison)bye

If I had to choose ....Abortion! Damn I wouldnt want to just drink drink drink and try to kill it..

Though abortion is still killing the little life, but... It's at least done professionally.

But I would not go call u horrible though. There should be no name calling here! We are all here to help and give advice, not to judge.

so.... I dont think u should do either.

Drinking might not kill it, but it could be born with lots of problems, fetal alcohol syndrom. You don't want that, right? There are other options. Please don't do this, do you think you will be able to move on and forgive yourself?
I think a lot of females (especially young and single) feel like you at one point, that is not really want to be pg. But remember your child is a gift, there are women who are trying so hard to have a baby, and cant. Consider yourself lucky, in a way. If you follow through, you may hurt your body and not be able to have a baby later, when you are ready. Who told you that the baby would not feel anything. My baby did. I got stress out, he would roll up in to a hard ball, I ate chili and he would start moving around & kicking like crazy, I was happy and my baby would move and kick in a soft way. They can even hear your voice. Please rethink, and name calling is wrong, please don't be discouraged to post what you are feeling, people here really want to help!!! Better to get it off your chest here then go at it alone!!!!

I don't think you should have an abortion or try to kill your baby. There could be other problems that accur with your baby like deformity or other things. Please think about other women who have tried to have a baby for years. Give your baby up for adoption. Just remember your unborn child is a gift from god. Im 9 weeks pregnant and have allready seen my baby's heart beat and little arms and legs. Please get some help. And don't hurt your baby.

abortion isn't something you should take lightly. Sex isn't either! I had an abortion when I was 17. It seemed like my only option at the time. I do not regret my decision, however I do regret being in the situation. I wan't nearly as careful as I should have been.... Now that I think about it I shouldn't have been having sex then either.

I'm now an adult with a 4 year old daughter. My husband and I have been desperately trying to have another baby. Last year my dreams were shattered when I miscarried at nearly three months. Let me tell you this, if you miscarry, you still need (in most cases) to have a d&c performed. It is the same procedure as an abortion. I was unconcious for the procedure when I miscarried. Drinking will most likely not make you miscarry. On the contrary, you will probably have a baby with severe problems (fetal alchol syndrome, cleft pallet, etc.) if you really feel as though not having this child all together is your only alternative, then please seek medical help before making any drastic decisions. Abortions hurt, so does a miscarriage. It is a terrible cramping (quite similar to a heavy peiod). It lasts only about 3-5 minutes and then it is done. Afterword, there is not much pain, other than emotional. You need to be prepared for what you will feel in your heart and in your mind rather than in your body.

Nobody can tell you what to do... But I can tell you there are other options available. There are many people in this world, even some posting on here how much they want a child. You could also check into adoption.

Like I said, I do not regret my decision to abort, there were other reasons why I made this decison. Now that I have a child and a husband and want children in my life, I often think about the choices I had made in the past....... I regret being in the situation all together. I do not promote abortions, however it is legal and it is your choice.

Have you ever considered the consequences? What happens if you do drink allot and try to miscarry (thats so wrong its not even thinkable) and a couple of months later you find out your still pregnant only this time your not only pregnant you have to worry about other things like fetal alcohol syndrome and maybe giving birth to an unhealthy baby!! You honestly need to think about this, you might not want to hurt by getting an abortion, but what about your child did you ever think about hurting it?? Sweetie you need to do something, just do the right thing!!! Please!!!

Lee

I do not believe any one should judge anyone else on their personal decision of having an abortion or not. That is the woman's choice if she wants to be pregnant or not. I am not saying abortion is a means of birth control, because it is not. But, if birth control percautions were taken, and a pregnancy did occur, then why the heck should someone be judged if they want to have an abortion or not???? As for intentionally trying to miscarry, that is horrible. Chances are, simply by drinking, a miscarrage will not occur, and the mother is now left with a child that she intentionally injured, and that child will likely face medical challenges it's entire life. Did you even think about the fact that when you miscarry, depending on the trimester you are in....You may have to go through delivery in order to remove the dead child from your body.

Go friggen talk to your mom and your doctor. If abortion is not for you, consider adoption. At least the child will have an opportunity.

I totally agree with blu_eyes00, yes you do have a choice and its every mothers right, if you really dont want this baby get an abortion or give it up for adoption. Please think about what you are doing, purposely miscarrying is a horrible thing, you'll live with that the rest of your life. Its immoraly wrong and very unsafe.

Lee

There are always ways to live without having to abort a baby or try to miscarry.

And I am not here to judge u. I wont call u names or say it's a horrible thing to do.

But I just want you to think about what you want to do.

And I am not gonna lie to you that a baby is a huge responsibilty, are u sure u can take care of the baby? Are u finally, emotionally, physically ready for a baby?

I dont believe one should be taken away her choice of giving a life or not. I am not gonna be religious here, coz I think religion has nothing to do with a freedom one has!

So before u make a decision, I think u should think about whether or not u will be able to raise this child with all that u can provide him/her, and are u gonna be able to educate ur child with possitive thinking? And how are u gonna teach ur child how to deal with situations at school...Etc...

Good luck...

I want to thank all of the positive replys to my post like trevino and blu eyes and hong kong chick think u cuz I really needed sum positive support even if u did disagree with wat I waz thinkin about doin howver I found out that I am not pg and happy. And to amanda who has so much to say instead callin me names and makin wrong assumptions I only took those two ideas into consideration bc im only 14 and I will like to finish my education and I wouldnt want to have to put it up for adoption bc I wouldnt want to get older and not be able to have my child know her/his mother is. Now b4 u go judge sum body else think about all the possibilities b4 making false assumtions.

Good luck to you in ur future and hope u learned from this time/

and hey no need to thank us, we are all trying to help and be a friend. What's better than women who have been in the same situation and giving each other advices? :p

Shhss

""im only 14 and I will like to finish my education and I wouldnt want to have to put it up for adoption bc I wouldnt want to get older and not be able to have my child know her/his mother is.""


you can still finish your education even with a baby. I know lots of girls who have done that. You can go to college anytime, but that particular son or daughter of yours will only be once. You may have other children, but you can only have that special baby once. Never again to get him or her back. Most girls don't realize they are dealing with homicide vs college. You can go to school for the rest of your life. Everyone is going back to school now days. Children are no mistakes. Every baby is an angel, a gift from god. Lots of couples would love to have your baby. I am sorry, but once you kill it you cannot get it back. They are gone forever. Once you see that sweet innocent eyes looking into your eyes would you ever regret the fact that you chose to keep your baby?

It's never the babies fault. Selfishness is what drives people to have abortions. We think that babies are curses. "oh my, I am pregnant...Let's just abort it. No one will have to know about it." yet you struggle for the rest of your life. Guilt, sorrow, fear, and shame clouds over your mind, your thoughts, until you emotionally shut down. Don't let that happen.

Your timing may not be god's timing. But accept what he gives you and he will not let you regret it. Not saying every moment will be pure bliss, but you will not have the pain as you would with an abortion. (speaking from experience).

All I ask is that you think about what I said. Make sure your decision is regarding you and your baby.

Best wishes!
Kaireejo

I hope things work out for you..
Best wishes
ga

Whatever decision you make should be yours and yours alone. Anyone responding to you on the discussion board is not going to be the one living with any decision you are. However, if the reason you're choosing to not have an abortion is the painful affects on your unborn child, having a miscarriage on purpose would be even more painful for the baby.

Adoption is a hard choice for mothers to make. But just remember why you don't want this baby to begin with. Maybe someone else would be able to take great care of this child.

Whichever choice you make, please let this teach you something. You don't want to have an abortion and then end up pregnant again in six months.

Aw hun, you are definately right in not wanting to have a medical abortion. I wish everyone would watch one of those programs - honestly, to see what they're really doing to a child! Anyone who saw that wouldn't want to do such a thing...

But I think you gotta understand that if you force yourself to miscarry, that is also an abortion. What you're trying to do is poison the baby so it dies inside of you and your body labors it out. There's an abortion pill that does the same thing. Miscarriage is a natural thing, not brought on by intention... I know, i've had one. It's a very painful, very sad experience. Especially since the baby was dead for so long inside of me and I had no idea.

I still don't think abortion is right even if we're trying to abort them "humanely". It still ends his/her life, and your future with them. Now if you're young and things are hard... Please dig up support around you, your family and loved ones are sure to help you. If not... There's places you can call. I'll try to think of some links off the top of my head:

www.Pregnancy911.Com - she made this site cause places like planned parenthood usually think abortion is the first way out, not as a last resort. It's out for money so doesn't exactly think of your needs first.

Www.Standupgirl.Com is an aweeesome site with testimonials of girls who regret their abortions or are happy they had their children through the toughest of times. Regret can be the bigest let down in a person's life. This woman really cares .

Www.Abortionfacts.Com - knowlegde is power! Know more about what abortion is like and the aftereffects.

And I know www.Prochoice.Com has a lot of links if you're thinking of putting him/her up for adoption .

Phew. I know things are scary. I was pregnant once and I miss my baby so much - I never would've thought of intentionally ridding it from my life. I hope you find much strength and power and hope... Don't forget there's help and hugs out there.

And blu_eyes, I agree with you up to the point that - sure a woman can decide if she wants to be pregnant or not, but if she already is... I feel that's a different story. Accident or not (a lot of us were accidents, after all) a woman consents to sex therefore should own up to her responsibility of getting pregnant. We're not judging them - we're trying to care for her as well as her baby. And I don't think anyone should have to be alone on their decision. But maybe if they get all the facts, all the alternatives, and still she wants it... There isn't much one can do I suppose. But I try anyway

This girl would be over a year pregnant by now.

A medical abortion would definately have been better than a self-induced miscarriage.

It is the woman's choice what she wants to do. Yes, some people do regret their decision, that is why each individual has to make that decision for themselves. Just because some people regretted it does not mean that you will. You cannot go by what someone else tells you.

I would not try to self-abort by drinking.It may not work and then ,you deliver a child that never had a good start in life.I have worked with fetal alcohol syndrome kids and they are some of the saddest kids you can imagine.If you do not want to carry your child to term,an abortion is a choice.If a woman decides she wants to put her child up for adoption,the least she could do is ensure that her child will be as healthy as possible.The most important issue is that a woman should be able to choose what is right for her individual situation,not some lawmaker or preacher.Support the choice!!!!!Patty