Using Raw Potatoes to Combat "demons"

I went to work on monday at unitek to teach citrix with maybe more energy and dynamism than ever before in my stellar 10-year teaching carreer. But I also have been losing weight dangerously as over the last several weeks, since a few days before hurricane katrina hit, and definitely during the whole two weeks of civil unrest and city destruction in new orleans. I'm a demon eater, and there's been a big buffet going lately, and i've been gorging. And i've figured out that demons eaten but undigested burn calories. I now can't go one hour without food. I eat $20 dollars of groceries a day plus two restaurant meals. And I am starving and shaky hungry all the time, and losing a few pounds a week. It's my metabolism. Partly because of my big 12-hour runs through the canyons to the mountain peaks on the weekends, partly because I commute ten-minutes here, ten-minutes there, every day by bike, probobly 5 to 10 miles a day 7 day s a week, and partly because I discovered the pleasure of sitting in a sauna for thirty minutes a day before my shower, and partly because of the high-peak mountain tea, but mostly because when I read I swear I burn calories with my mind, because if I sit quietly after a meal i'm ok for an hour or two, but if I pick up the paper and read, I come up with all these interconnected ideas and in minutes i'm starving. My metabolism is higher than anything i've ever experienced, and I feel more powerful than i've ever been, but it is also almost dangerous as i'm in starvation throughout the night when I sleep, and i'm afraid i'm going to pass out from thought flow. Died from racing thinking. Or turn into a walking set of neurons, with no flesh or bone left.



So I went out with some of the medical students and teachers for their class party at the end of a module, and at the bar I came up with the idea that if I get desperate, I could take an antipsychotic drug, (any psychiatrist in america would be thrilled to give me one) and just use it occasionally, and I know that would slow me down. I had read an article that pointed out that people on those things complain that they gain two pounds a week. That makes sense. The thinking slows, the metabolism slows.



Here's the imagery i'm working with. Yosemite half dome is a valley surrounded by 7000 ft peaks. Clarisee and justin and I camped on one of the peaks and looked down. To the south is hetch-hetchy, a similar valley that was flooded in the last century by damning it up, and that's the water supply for sf and la, and the environmentalists are talking about "draining" hetch hetchy, to restore the natural valley.



The mind is the valley. The demons take up residence in shacks all over the sides of the valley, mostly on the bottom, but as the community grows, the community of demon homes crawls up the sides of the valley. They build telecommunications equipment, and contact the mother ship, more come down, there's a huge festival going on - this is "racing thougt"; the human with this mind goes in to the psychiatrist and they give them antipsychotics to flood hetch hetchy, or the client uses drugs or alchohol to flood it themselves.



But if you flood it and then drain it, the demons are still there, in fact while scuba diving they've been digging and building at an even more rapid rate because now the ground is soggy and easier to work. So if you drain it suddenly, or even gradually, it is far less stable than it was in the first place. Exorcism is another way to get them out, but I went though an exorcism and it was like nuking the city of demons - the houses were still there but the demons gone, it was quiet. Thing is the mother ship still knows about a famous location, and they can repopulate, just like bush says he'll repopulate new orleans with no respect for katrina's will.



So I thought maybe, if these demons can't be managed, if they get out of hand, i'd rain on them with a little of the antipsychotic, but a little rain just helps them, that's not really a good answer; i'm already unstable, I can't afford to be too much more unstable.



So I came up with another idea - eat roots. Only roots. Uncooked roots. I got the idea from when mary was studying polarity. They said roots are earth food, all the other stuff is air food or water food or fire food, and if I think about it I eat all air and fire food, no earth food, and every shamanic practitioner in the world says i'm ungrounded. Earth foods are supposed to ground you. Somehow I thought maybe that would work, but I was still just throwing meatball sandwhiches at myself to try to slow the metabolism, but it wasn't doing anything.



I asked the head of the nursing program here, who knows me well, about a natural alternative to antipsychotics. I explained that my emotional level is that of a two year old, and so I get excited about attention, and my business is doing so well I get all kinds of attention - people all aroundthe country saying they want me to come out and show them stuff, teach computer networking. Business is booming and I get so excited I can't slow down my metabolism.



She said raw potatoes. And her coworker came up with tea made from hops. I bought the hops but two days and so far that just makes me hungrier. I've been doing the hops tea at night and the pollen from the flowers gives me ghost bugs for hours, so less sleep, and then i'm even less stable, but the potatoe is a miracle cure. I bought a little golden potatoe, skinned it, chopped it, and ate it raw, not so bad, just wash it down with a little water, and it's the first thing in weeks that my body calmed down with. At first I thought it could be placebo, but it's been several potatoes now and I think it's real.



Flood hetch hetchy valley with potatoes, and it doesn't soak the soil like the water that represents drugs or alchohol, so no side effect of being less stable after the demons dig their way back out. But the potatoe is anti demon technology for sure. And i'm not out to destroy the demon community. Two hours of calm in the potatoe valley and I miss my magic powers already. I just need to have a method of managing the valley when it gets out of hand, and a way of putting a limit on my own magic so I can maintain a human body and not burn up in a final flash of fiery metabolism. I could see it in the irish, they get too into it. They learn the magic of potatoes, then throw in a million, and hurt their own demons, and then in the irish potatoe famine, I always thought "why don't they just eat something else", but now I understand, it's like a bunch of people addicted to antipsychotics and stopped taking their medication. They jumped off their island and swam to the nearest continent to get more potatoes. Potatoes raw are like seroquel.