Joined: 06 Dec 2005 Posts: 58 Location: Moved from Alaska to Cape Coral, Fl
Drug Addiction? Posted: 12-06-05 19:25pm
When I was young (about 14) my real dad
made me do crack and I got kinda addicted
to it, but I stoped doing it when my mom
moved us. I did coke from about 16 to
about 21 off and on, but I quite doing
that too ( I have only done it about 6
times in the last year). The latest
thing I did was meth, I got into it kinda
bad, but I haven't done that in about a
year. The main problem is that I don't
feel like I need the drugs, but if is in
front of me I won't say no. It's like
when I see it or smell it I become
temporarly addicted to it and I can't say
no. Is this normal? I also been
drinking almost every night. I feel like
I have to drink every night and I feel
anxious if I don't have it. I don't
drink during the day, it's only at night?
So do I have an addiction?
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sandyallen
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 02 Feb 2004 Posts: 4580
Posted: 12-06-05 20:13pm
In my opinion, yes, you have a very
addictive personalityand you need to seek
help, I am no dr but I have seen it many
times before, alchohol and drugs are both
chemicals which lead to addiction.
Good luck!
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shadowalker164
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 14 Jan 2005 Posts: 175 Location: Tampa, FL
Posted: 12-07-05 10:29am
Amber, sometimes I ask myself questions
when I suspect in my heart of hearts, I
already know the answer. Maybe what I am
doing is fishing for an answer that will
satisfy me that things are different than
they really are.
Just speaking for me, I got strung out on
meth while in the army in germany way back
in the early 70's. I didn't want to quit
shooting up speed. The idea scared the
crap out of me. I started calling it
medicine towards the end, because it
didn't make me feel good, it just kept me
from feeling real bad.
I eventually replaced speed with alcohol.
And after enough time, it became medicine
too. I came too in the morning, and I
could not stand the way I felt. But I
knew that a few drinks would make all
those feelings of failure just go away.
Drinking, at the end of my drinking
career, didn't make me feel good, it just
kept me from feeling real bad.
Through all that, I could still convince
myself that things weren't what they were.
Because if I admitted that my life was
out of control, that might beg the
question, well, what are you going to do
about it? And the idea of not having the
ease and comfort of chemically induced
oblivion was unthinkable.
I was hopelessly lost in my addictions.
The first step for me was to admit that
things were not ok. Things were in fact
totally out of control, and I was
completely powerless over that next line,
bottle, or pipe full of “medicine”.
Amber, I can't answer your question, a
doctor can't answer it, only you can give
yourself an answer that has the necessary
weight and depth.
I involved myself in aa. In there I found
people who felt just like me, and they had
solved this problem.
You are a young woman, my suggestion to
you is find a young persons meeting in
your town, and show up. I am sure you
will find other young women there that
have asked the same questions.
Richard
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Amber1983
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 06 Dec 2005 Posts: 58 Location: Moved from Alaska to Cape Coral, Fl
Posted: 12-07-05 11:08am
I agree with alot that you said, I am
really the only person that could answer
it. It's just confusing, because I don't
feel like I need it and I can go without
it for forever, but if it is put in front
of me I can't say no. Like I hadn't done
it for like 5 months then some one put a
line of meth in front of me, and I wasn't
about to turn it down, I don't think I
could have if I even wanted to.
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kirztensmummy
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 10 Oct 2005 Posts: 326 Location: london
Posted: 12-07-05 11:53am
amber1983
wrote:
i agree with alot that you
said, I am really the only person that
could answer it. It's just confusing,
because I don't feel like I need it and I
can go without it for forever, but if it
is put in front of me I can't say no.
Like I hadn't done it for like 5 months
then some one put a line of meth in front
of me, and I wasn't about to turn it down,
I don't think I could have if I even
wanted to.
i know its hard to refuse especially if
youre hooked up with that particular thing
but you should think about the long term
consequences/effects that drugs will do to
you. If you find it really hard hy dont
you try to look for the nearest drug
counselling in your area and just see
them. Hope it helps
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shadowalker164
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 14 Jan 2005 Posts: 175 Location: Tampa, FL
Posted: 12-07-05 14:02pm
Some people will sell everything they own
in order to get one more line. They will
steal or rob to get the money needed to
snort one more dime bag. I think just
about everyone would call that person
powerless over their addiction.
Now take a person like yourself, you can
go a long time without using. Everything
seems to be going fine, then someone puts
a mirror full of meth in front of you, and
I quote…” I wasn't about to turn it
down, I don't think I could have if I even
wanted to.”
honey, i'm not here to take your
inventory, but what part of the word
powerlessness doesn't fit your
circumstances.
This disease is tricky. One of the most
common features of addiction is denial.
Don't let it fool you.
