Life used to be idyllic and free from pain and worry when I was a child; 20 years into my life, I feel that i'm trapped in a maze of misery. There's not a single thing about myself i'm satisfied with. Not my appearance, not my personality, not my skills (don't think I have any). Nothing. I have no friends, i'm confused with my sexuality, and there's no point in staying here any longer. I do have my family, though. We are, however, not close, and we've never ever been. We don't discuss emotions and such.

If it wasn't for my family, i'd travel to a remote location and end this misery. Nobody would miss me; nobody would search for me. Perfect! Matters aren't unfortunately like the aforementioned "dream" of mine. I work hard to stay strong. I don't wish to leave anybody behind in pain or in shame of my ruthless actions. It's going to be tought and striveful, just like life is. I'll stay alive, but for what personal reason? I have no ambitions and no goals. I do have a job, which I happen to dislike quite badly..

There isn't a solution to my deep issues. Nobody can "talk" me out of this maze. Nevertheless, I know there is a way out. If I could just get a new face, a new body, i'd find my way out of dispondency...