Medical Questions > Mental Health > Depression Forum

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Hi I discovered this forum when I was actually trying to find the lethal dose of a medication so I could commit suicide. Ironic, huh?

Anyway, I was diagnosed with major depressive disorder and anxiety back in january of this year. I was out of work for 3 months, because I was so sick I could not leave the house.

I am back to work (major problems with that, b/c I hate my job, but can't find a better one.)

i guess my question is this. I have never considered myself the kind of person to be "depressed" I have always been happy with things, even the little things in life.

I take budepropin sr (wellbutrin, but generic) and clonazepam. I feel like my entire life has gone to $h**. Please pardon the semi-cursing. Obviously I need different drugs. I am 28 years old, been with my husband for 10 years, married for 3. I have absolutely no sex drive, none whatsoever. If we are intimate once a month, it is amazing.

I know that I am making my husband miserable, he does his best to help me, but I act selfishly and don't often see what I am doing to him. My father doesn't believe that I am sick, and thinks my doctor is a quak.

Is anyone else going through the same thing, but not really believing it? I am so tired of being, feeling, acting this way. I have tried switching medications 3 times. I see a therapist 2 times a month. My psychologist once a month.... Yet I am suicidal. This really sucks.
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replied November 28th, 2005
Me Either
Hi there,
i stumbled on the site too actually reading about my meds I am newly taking been diagnosed with depression too and no would you think I was one of those sad , un-happy with everything type of person complete opposite in fact! But here I am.......I am married also...Have quite a few problems in that area also but trying to work it out as we have 2 kids and my situation isnt as easy as leave (my kids are us citizens) I am from england.......

I have been very emotional for a long long time........But I never wanted to admit I had a problem.......I dont see myself as crazy and thats the label you get in life but were just troubled souls I guess that need help!!!!

Let me tell you this...Harming yourself is not the answer already been there took an over-dose back in 2000 and nope never was given meds or anything had to see a shrink who made me worse but anyways then I had 2 great kids (after trying to get pregnant with no luck) I just have started being a person I dont want to be.My husband goes on the computer every night and I get so angry!!! Really angry I think I gave up my family to be here with him for what half the time???

But I am here and gotta try and get through this.The meds might help though reading too much is making me feel badly !!! God you cant win I feel :(

anyways I am going to a support group I found tonight sit in a circle I dont want to go...........But my dr thinks tonight it might help.......I hate that my husband doesnt feel compelled to go to any therapy its all me in my head ........It is hard somedays........But I gotta take care of myself I cant expect anyone to make me happy I have to love myself and want to be happy.....Something I havnt done in a long time I put myself last .......Thought that whats mums are supposed to do but I am finding out its not healthy at all...........

Gosh I truly am sorry to go on and on............

I hope your doing ok? I will check in soon!

Take care and know your not alone
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replied December 1st, 2005
Well, I am doing better. I called my psychiatrist and told her how I was feeling. She called me in a prescription for lexepro. I took 5mg for two days, it made my stomach a little sick. On monday I bumped myself up to the whole 10mg. My body is still getting used to it, sometimes my hands are shaky, or my head feels weird.

But my husband said that I am already acting differently, and I feel better (a little bit :))
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replied December 1st, 2005
Me Again :)
Hi there!
Just realized we are talking to each other on two boeards left you a message at mine getting used to this label that one :)

glad yor doing ok.My tummy was really chrnnig for about three days I started last tueday....So been on it over a week then this tuesday I took 10mgs and today I had shaky hands a little too....But so far not too bad..All what I read about weight gain freaks me out a bit as I lost 20ibs the last few months as I guess I am pretty busy runnnig around I cant diet hate too..........But I dont want to gain weight as I heard from reading other stuff (you know stuff you shouldnt read but you do)

i think maybe when your depressed some people eat and then you put on wieght from that not from your meds? I dunno some people will say its definately the meds guess we are all different thuogh I would gain a bit as long as I was happy.Yeah like a pound hahaha

well take care


goodnight again!
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