I really understand. When my weight fell to 53 pounds, I was commited to a locked facility against my will and everything was taken away from me. No smokes, no coffee, no exersize, no t.V. No anything. Because it was a ward for those who are in danger of themselves or others, I wasn't even allowed my crossstich or sewing. I was put on bedrest and told I would stay there until I gained 50 pounds. They forced me to eat 3,500 calories every day even though I had stayed under 60 pounds for 3 years and used to a diet of only 300-500 calories a day. It was hell. I can say that is the worst thing that has ever happened to me in my life. It was only 3 months and I had gained the full 50 pounds and let me tell you, I felt like the hugest flabbiet ugliest person alive. I cried and cried every day and resolved to lose it promptly as soon as I got out. (of corse I didn't tell the doctor that) every one said I looked great but inside I was being eaten alive. I lost some of the weight but not all (actually glad I didn't realising that i'd probably die before getting back down that low) but guess how long it took me? 2 years to lose 30 pounds!!!!! And I just found out I have low thyroid and I have actually put on 10 pounds in 2 weeks and even though I probably eat 800 calories a day or less, I am still gaining...I am angry and I feel fat too. Like I said, I go fort a walk and I power walk at least 2 hours a day. Hypothyroidism sucks. I can't lose any weight unless I eat nothing and even then I bet i'd only lose a pound or two at the most per week. Hope you get feeling better, and by the way, the more you diet, the slower your metabolism gets, I just don;t want you to end up like me. I love food and I am upset that I have to purge my meals just so I don't gain 5 pounds a week.