My friends sister was in the same situation as you, except she was with her bf for 10 years before he decided to ask her to marry him. He was the same way as your bf though, said that he wanted to and had it all planned out and they always talked about marraige, kids etc. He just wanted to make sure that they were financially stable and emotionally/physically ready for everything that would come with marraige. He wanted to finish college and get a good job so he could support her and their future family, which was a very smart idea on his part because now they're totally focus on their kids and not have to worry about money.

I know it isn't easy but just be patient it'll happen.

*sigh* I hear what your saying!!

My partner sounds excatley the same....And I mean excatly!!!

I just hate how everything seems to be on his terms. Everything from where we live, marriage, children etc. I've made alot of sacrefices to be with him which I have no regrets doing but it does make me wonder when is it going to be my turn!!!

Thanks for the advice!! I'm trying!! :-{

Tell him that being married is important to you. You love him no matter what, but you have an internal desire to be married. If he gives you the plan business, try to set a "deadline" together. Say "i understand why you have a plan, don't you think we can be ready to be married by .........?" if the deadline passes, ask him, if he says no, follow your heart.

Well he did once say that if he had his own way we wouldnt get married till we we're in our 30's!!! I flat out told him that I was not willing to wait that long. I'm 25 and he is 26. Other than that its always 'maybe in a couple of years'!!!

Thanks for your help ironmantaylors!! :-)

Hey pixma,

a story based on personal experience. I told my girlfriend in college that we would get married when she finished school. I was two years ahead of her. I got a job teaching school, and we were long distance for two years. She student taught in the fall, I was going to ask her to marry me during the christmas holidays. She dumped me on oct. 16th. She moved in with another man in nov. And he asked her to marry him over the christmas holidays!!!

Years later, I told her I was planning on asking her to marry me. She was devestated. I could tell that it will be a regret of hers for the rest of her life.

You can read more about this on my post under "long distance.........." right here on the dating forum.

My plan is to go broke and die on the same die, and with no regrets. Try to live life with no regrets pixma. The best advice I can give anyone.

Do I regret not asking her? Some, but I had told her "when you finish school" so her impatiance cost us both.

Don't let impatience cost you, let him know how you feel.

I wont ever leave my stephen! But I can see where your coming from ironmantaylors!!

I guess I want it sooo much because I come from a family (and extended) that doesn't except pregnancy out of wedlock!! My biological clock is ticking a hell of a lot faster than most women my age!! I would like to be married before I conceive!! But at the moment i'll take anything that comes first!!

Thanks for helping!! I'm still very restless about the whole situation but i'm not going anywhere!!:-)

I just turned 50; he's 53. We have 6 kids and 2 previous marriages between us. He's hinting at marriage in the not too distant future though there hasn't, as yet, been a proposal.

It's been almost a year and I haven't met his friends or kids and feel like he has a whole secret life when i'm not around. We're financially ok, live together and have fun but I don't know if I can marry him if he asks me because there seem to be so many unanswered questions. Long engagements are bad; are short ones worse?

I too hate waiting. I've been with my boyfriend for 11 1/2 years and still no proposal. In 1998 we moved in together and he told me that we would live together for a year and then get married, that still has not happened. 2 years ago he told me that we would get married this year in august and now he's says next august. I don't know how much longer I can wait.

if it were me after the year I would have cut the bootie. If you give the free milk he won't buy the cow.