Omg you cant do that!!! Hun, even if you think that its gonan be hard you have to talk to someone. You can go to planned parenthood to get prenatal care. They have to be confidential and no one has to know but you really need prenatal care. Something may not only go wrong with the babys health, but your health as well! If you dont want it yes it is legal to leave the baby at a fire station, police station or hospital. However you need to realize that regardless of the community your parents love you and will probably be less terrifying than you think. My parents are big shots in my community too but I have told at least my mom. I'll probably tell me dad soon too. But you are already 5 or 6 months?? First of all go buy a pregnancy test or get one of your friends to do it for you. And like I said if you dont like any of those options go to your nearest planned parenthood and they will do one.

I don't even know if I have a planned parenthood in my community. I'm too scared to go to a doctor anyway. I would need parental consent to go anywhere, wouldn't i? I've been taking the vitamins and I feel the baby move pretty regularly, so i'm pretty sure it's healthy. I just need to get through this without anyone knowing. My parents would not be okay with this and neither would anyone in my community. Our town has about 250 people total. Everyone knows everyone else and my parents are big figures in the town. If anyone found out about this, they'd be ruined. I can't do that to them. I haven't even told my best friend yet. I haven't told the father either. No one can ever find out. I'm so scared. I have no idea what to do.

No you dont need parental consent to see a doctor in fact they can not by law say anything to your parents

Personaly I dont think its a good idea to keep it a secret and I do think you should see a doctor. And im sure people will find out anyways. I mean you have to have birth to it. And you should tell the father, what if he wants it, and you can give him all the responsibilitys and give up yours to the baby if your willing to do so

All right sweetie, take a couple deep breaths and listen carefully.
You will have to at least consult the lesser evils of your parents so that they can make sure that neither the baby or you are in risk of any complications that could end up life threatening.
Having the baby on your own wouldn't be very smart, you may need that medical attention that only doctors, or midwives, offer because you're so young and you're body isn't fully developed.

I know it's going to be a really, really hard thing to do, but if you hope for the best between you and the baby it's a must.
I'd check with what your parent(s) say after. Maybe they can support the baby and say it's their own, or, giving the child up for adoption in better hopes of the child having a good life.

I know you dont want everyone in your community knowing because you dont want them saying bad stuff about you. But if you choose to keep this baby (which I dont think you are) it dosnt matter what others think, all thatmatters is that you and the baby are happy and healthy. But im not going to judge you on what you do, we all make mistakes that we cant take back.And we all make decistions that make us happy its a part of life. All I can say is good luck and I hope you make the right distion for you and your baby

Im sorry I can not hear everyone talking about how its going to be okay and blah blah blah...I may sound like a bad person but I could care less at this point. You are the biggest most selfish person on this board. How do you lay down and have sex yet you are scared to face the consequesnces? Didnt you think people in your community would find out that you've had sex with someone unprotected? No you didnt but now you dont want people to know about the life that is growing inside of you. You havent been to the doctor and you dont know if the baby is okay. That is selfish. If u feel so bad and blah blah blah you should have thought up a plan when you missed your period the first time. I dont feel sorry for you and I dont think "advice" is something you need right now, you need sence a whole lot of sense. And you need to go to the doctor and own up to your responsibilities....Like dalicialynn said one time "you play you pay!!!!!!!"

Look!!! I know your scared out of your mind but.....




#1- it's not about your damn parents!!!!

#2- yes, they'll probably be mad, but madder if you had of told them eariler. They just start to think they were bad parents for not realizing that their daughter is 5 or 6 months and they didn't know.




#3- the first thing they will want to do is help you!




#4- don't leave the baby anywhere, did your mother deny you!!! That child will hate you!! For the rest of you life (generally speaking) if you do that!




#5- sorry to say it, but right now your only thinking about yourself!




#6- your pissing me off cuz people are trying to give you advice and your trying to find everyway to not take it. If your not going to do the right thing, and your not going to take anyone advice, then don't ask!




#7- i've miscarried 3 babies, and your about to try to hide your pregnany and leave the baby somewhere!! That's krazy!!




#8- medical answer what the community thinks, you did have sex(are you ashamed about that too?)

#9- everyone is gonna find out, there's no way you can hide it any longer espically if your showing right now. So you might as well get a head start on telling your parents. They'll be mad for a lil while, but happy that the baby is on the way!!

#10- if your so scared. Write a letter to ur parents and leave it somewhere for them to find. And since you don't want to keep the baby, at least give it up for adoption (although you'll probably regret that).

#11- don't ask for advice if your not going to take it.




#12- i'm not trying to be mean, but when I read this, it made me cry because I can't believe you would do that to an innocent baby!!!! If you were old enough to have sex, you might as well be old enough to take care of this baby!

#13- i'm not tryna make u feel bad, but damn! Are you serious!?




Look: if you need any help I will find it for you, because I feel sorry for that baby!


when I got preggo I was trying to hide it too. But I knew I couldn't. I was thinking the same thing you were. And that my parents wouldn't love me or help me and they would be ashamed of me. They said alot of mean and hurtful things at first (like i'm sure your parents will when they find out). But about after 2 days reality set in thell apolized for being mean but told me that they were just a lil disappointed about it, but they would help me. My mother found out first bcuz I wrote a letter and left it on my dresser and she found it. "everything happens for a reason and god never gives you anything that you can't handle" I think you knwo the right thing to do, so do that!




Please keep us posted and don't do anything that your mother wouldn't do and don't do anything that your going to regret!!!!




Oh and start on that letter!!!




~monica~

U need a doc if u didnt want the baby why didnt u use protection?(ariellagrimm)

Hey

my mom flipped out on me for having #2 and im 21 but she called me a week later and apologized because she is a mom and should have been more supportive.

A kid isnt a toy and who care what people think honey you need to raise your head higher than them or build self esteem!!!

I understand people not knowing cause yes they will say stuff and maybe even mean stuff get used to it the reality is you take responsibility for your actions. I was ask where my daughter has been adopted or get called racist names because my husband is dark asian, i'm married have a house a job and still get called names

if you need to talk i'm here but I think you need to open your eyes to reality cause no matter what you do its wrong but thats the choice for you to make are you going to be successful and live well or become a mockery of people

make the choice


take care!!!!!!!


Jess

I just want to say a few things. I don't know for sure if i'm really welcome here because some of you are yelling at me (part of the reason that i'm afraid to talk to my mom and dad), and some of you are telling me that everything is okay. If i'm not welcome here, I don't have to be here. Tell me straight and i'll leave. It's not like I really know anyone here anyway. But here's what I wanted to say. I looked online for a planned parenthood clinic and found one in a town about an hour from mine. I'm planning to go there this weekend since my parents will be out of town anyway. They're going to a church retreat. The next thing is, everyone's telling me that i'm selfish for wanting to give my baby away and selfish for not telling my parents. I'm really not trying to be selfish. I'm trying not to ruin everyone's lives, including the life of this baby. I'm shy. I don't have many friends and I don't think that a baby would be happy with me as its mother. It's not that I don't want this baby. It's inside me, I love it. I just know that I can't keep it because that's not the best life for it. And the final thing I wanted to do is apologize for not taking the advice you've been generous enough to put out for me. This is the first time that anyone but me has known about this baby and it's overwhelming for me to think that suddenly, I have to make all these desicions and do things that I know will challenge me and have the potential to ruin not only my life, but the lives of my mother and father as well. They raised me well and this should never have happened. Someone asked me if I was ashamed that I had sex. The answer to that is a resounding yes. I had no business having sex, no business getting pregnant, and no business trying to hide it. But what's done is done and now I have to face this new problem and figure out how to get through it. I've worked really hard so far. In just a few short months, i'll go into labor, have this baby, take it to a place where it will be safe and happy and return to my life. But don't think i'll let it stop there. This will go with me for the rest of my life. I'll never forget my baby. I'd keep it if I could. But I just don't think that I could make it happy. I don't want to be responsible for making that innocent baby's life miserable.

no you do not need your parents consent, and just b/c the baby moves does not mean it is healthy, there could be a lot of things wrong, that is why doctor do ultrasounds to see, and I don't want to sound mean or anything but if you are in a small town and your parents are these high figures in this town then why take the chance on getting pregnant, why did you start having sex? I am just wondering, b/c no matter how you prtect yourself from getting pregnant it is not 100%. But you really need to see a doc, and you can't just leave a baby at a shelter, what happens when your parents take you to the doc if you turn out to become sick after you have the baby, and they find out that you just had a baby what is going to happen then, what is going to happen when the news station gets ahold of this.....Baby girl/boy left at shelter, nobody knows where he/she came from, a small lil town that you live in a lot of people are going to start talking and the true will come out soon or later. I would rather my parents be mad and the town talk about me then take the chance of not having a healthy pregnancy

ok nobody said that you are not welcome here...People are just mad b/c you haven't seen a doctor, you are pregnant and you need to see one, yes I know you want to hide it from everybody, but read my post above. Yes people say you are being selfish b/c you are, you have a baby growing inside of you now, yes you may want to give this baby up and that is all up to you, but that baby anf you need too see a doctor, for the saftey of you and that baby.

You need to at least tell your parents. My mom would scream and call me names but she'd still love me. It'll be a shock to them (and you'll have to understand that) but they'll help you, but you need to be honest first. That baby is going to need things and you'll need time to prepare. You only have a few months before you are due and a baby has a lot of needs. Your body probably has a lot of needs. You won't be able to hide it much longer, you might as well tell them. Just say (even in a letter) "mom,dad, I made a mistake and need your help...." and go from there. Your mom will be the best person to help because she's a mom and knows what to do. God brought this baby into the world for a reason and it could bring you and your family closer than ever. It doesn't matter if you are a shy girl. My friend was a real shy girl and we live in an extremely small town where everyone knows everyone, and she's doing fine and so is the baby.

I understand that you're scared, it's ok to be, but you need to understand that you not taking responsibility for this unborn baby can cost....Big time!
This baby is completely innocent and in no way asked to be. This is when you need to be selfless....It's not about you anymore-you choose that!

I think everyone here has stated the obvious and I really don't want to repeat them...... Please do the right thing for your baby, get help!

I guess i'm not too worried that my parents will be mad. I'm worried that this will affect them and cause them strains at work. I live in a community that is rather "old fashioned" and I just don't want them to think that my parents raised me poorly. They didn't. I'm considering telling them before the birth, but I just don't know that it would be a good idea. I'm going to give it some time. I need to see what the clinic says and find out if i'm having a healthy baby. From there, i'll decide whether or not to tell my parents before the baby is born.

I know that everyone and their mother has replied to this, and everyone has offered some wonderful and useful advice, but I simply want to add my own two cents on the matter.

It's okay to want to give your baby up for adoption if you feel that you cannot provide for it - that may be the best option if you believe the child may end up being neglected. But by all means, please do not try to give birth to this child by yourself - you have no seen a doctor and you do not know if the child is in the proper position to be born, and you could end up going through life-threatening or fatal complications during childbirth. It is not healthy to go through pregnancy without medical care and there could be any number of things wrong with the child.

You can only hide your belly for so long - even the baggiest of clothes won't cover a fully pregnant abdomen. If not for your child's sake, at least try to get to a doctor (planned parenthood or any other walk-in clinic) for your own safety. I understand that you're scared of the situation that you're in, but would you really want to risk your own life just because you were to hide your pregnancy from the world? It's not as if your parents are going to force you to get an abortion because you're obviously too far along for that. Your parents may be shocked, upset, and disappointed about your pregnancy, but they're your parents and they love you - they won't ever stop loving you for any reason, so don't think they'll automatically hate you for this. They'll do what they can to help you and see that you're safe. Imagine if your pregnancy caused you great physical harm - your parents would feel so guilty knowing that they could not help you before you were hurt. Like I said, it's not only your child's life that could be in danger, but also yours.

I hope you figure out what you have to do before anything awful happens. Honestly, the best advice I can give is to try and heed the advice everyone has given you.

Sweety, make sure you get into that planned parenthood and make sure everything is alright with you and the baby first and foremost. Try not to worry so much about what the community will think, just tell your parents so that you have someone that will be there for you. Giving labor is going to be scary enough, you dont want to have to do that on your own. I'm just sitting here in tears for you and your baby, doesnt help that im over emotional lately, lol. I hope that everything works out for you and I hope that you keep us all updated. If you ever want to talk about anything at all you can write me. Take care, and get to the doctor hun!! ::hugs::

I was definetly concerned about that fact. Someone just said that I won't be able to conceal my growing belly much longer and they're right. I've been wearing my jeans unzipped and big baggy sweatshirts for a month or two now. I didn't realize how big I was really going to get, but i'm still hopeful that it won't be too noticeable by the time i'm ready to have the baby. This is a lot to think about right now. I hope it will all work out and that I can give birth safely to a healthy little boy or girl and that someone else can be happy in raising it. But there are no guarantees in life. The best I can do right now is go to the clinic, make sure that everything is okay and go on living my life until my parents find out or I get the guts up to tell them. I was planning originally to tell them after the baby was born and everything was okay again. That way, they would know and I wouldn't have to carry that secret around anymore. That's the way I want it to work out. My main concern this week is taking your advice and making sure that the baby is healthy. Next week, I can tackle some other obstacle.