Bipolar Disorder Forum - Marriage And Bipolar Disorder


Marriage And Bipolar Disorder

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Joined: 27 Feb 2008
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THANK YOU Posted: 02-28-08 08:31am


Thank you for your words of wisdom. He is in a very confident, cocky stage and is impossible to reason with. Praise God we don't have the rage or anger issue. He refuses to go back to see his dr and is opposed to any med changes. We do have an appointment for a med check mid march...but that feels like a 100 years from now! I feel like giving up on this. When do I get my needs met? How can I be a yo yo with my emotions. How can I pretend to be happy when I am not feeling loved at all by my husband? When he comes down off of this cockyness and confident time, how do I bounce back into a relationship with him. I am human! UGH sorry for all the complaining!

newbride807

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Posted: 02-29-08 18:17pm


I think my husband suffers from bipolar disorder but is still undiagnosed. He left 6 weeks ago while I was at work. We had only been married 5 months. I knew he was depressed and he was stressed about work, house hunting, and stressed about his immediate family. He always said he had to take care of everybody and I didn't know why he kept saying that to me. Suddenly he left and then just kind of checked out of all his responsibilities. He has never been violent with me. In the days before he left he was distracted, distant, not sleeping, etc. My in-laws tried to warn me but every time I tried to address it he was OK and ensured me he was fine. I guess he was pretending with me that he was OK. Since he left I can't seem to say anything right to him. I found out he cheated on me and I think he's living with this woman. He'll only communicate with me over email and he never really answers anything directly. He said he's seeing a psychiatrist now and makes it a point to tell me they haven't prescribed anything because he's not crazy. I wish I could go to a session with him, or at least find out who he's seeing so I can tell them what's happened. He's made it so I feel like I'm the one with a problem and I question all my actions. He's stopped communicating altogether with the rest of his family. I don't even know where he's living even though he says he's not being secretive and hiding...he explains it that he just left, "that's all." He seems to be surprised with everyone's reactions at his sudden disappearance and continued absence. This site has been very helpful. I'm seeing that a lot of people have or are experiencing similar situations.

wendylady

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overwhelmed Posted: 03-06-08 11:38am


My husband too has bipolar. So many of these situations sound so familiar. It feels so relieving and sad all at the same time. I am having a hard time because my husband has continually threatened "divorce" and is now telling me his is unattracted to me or anyone. He wants us to be married but have no questions, "relations". but just live in limbo basically. That isn't a realationship! I love my husband but the verbal and emotional confusion has me walking in circles. I am so frustrated! I am trying to make things work, mainly because of my faith at this point. I am just litterally exahusted.

GabrielAmber

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husband has bipolar and is hypochondriac Posted: 03-17-08 08:55am


My husband was recently diagnosed with Bipolar. I have known him for 3 years and the simptoms have only surfanced in the last year. We have 2 children under the age of 2. One is 16 months and the most recent addition is 3 months. I am at a point where fear has taken a hold of my senses. I'm constantly confused and unsure of wether i should stay with him because I love him and he seems to be alone in this. Then on the other hand I feel suffocated and abandoned by everyone i once loved because I chose to stay with him.

wendylady

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confused Posted: 03-18-08 11:31am


I have been reading more about bipolar and all the books seem to be about my husband. I want to stay with him but the things he says, though I know I shouldn't take them to heart I do. How do I seperate him from his illness? I am not sure if there is even a difference anymore. I feel confused all the time about what to do. I don't want to be his mother I want to have an equal relaionship and be his wife, but it seems almost impossible. Now I feel like I have been manipulated into the marriage because he said he only married me because it was what was expected of him and he only went to church and pretended to belive in God because he knew that is the only way I would marry him, and that broke my heart! I just feel so used and now all these books are telling me things can work but I have to basically give up my hopes and dreams to take care of my husband but where does that leave me. ESPECIALLY because he wont take meds or see a psychiatrist. I thought about giving him a timeline to make and attend a psych appt. and begin meds and if not he needs to go. I don't want to but I can't live in this limbo forever either. PLus I know how that conversation goes... he gets mad and storms off and says why don't I just leave now then. I am just so frustrated. Thanks for listening!

newbride807

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Tired and not doing well Posted: 03-18-08 19:52pm


The last 2 posts sound all too familiar. It's been over 2 months now since my husband left, and my last contact with him was on the phone 2 weeks ago where he ended up hanging up on me. I basically told him I thought he needed help. I also got upset because he wouldn't tell me where he was living and I found out he was still talking to this other woman while all along I was mourning him because he wouldn't take my calls and would take days at a time to respond to my emails. I'm tired, heartbroken, and I know my friends and family are tired with me as they are on this roller coaster with me. As time goes on I start to realize that this other relationship he started was probably only 4 months since we got married. While I thought things were OK at home and he was depressed and stressed about work, it was more....I spent my lunch hour looking for lawyers on the web. I don't want to but I think it's the only choice because I can't keep waiting for him if he doesn't want us anymore. We were together 5 years, and for some reason 5 months of marriage was all he could take. I spent last night looking at our wedding pictures and I know the looks we gave each other was real and true love. Where did it go? Why did it disappear for him? I almost feel like I'm having a nervous break down and wish I can run away too.

wendylady

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at my wits end Posted: 03-20-08 06:30am


I got all excited when my husband wanted to go to a psych appt and aggreed to start taking any meds RXed but... last night he spent our grocery money on drugs!!! I was so pissed that I had to take a ride. Then I got accused of "running" so when I walked back in the house to "confront" him and prove that I was willing to fight for our marriage. Then he just told me to get out. I cleared my head for a few hours and decided that it is counterproductive to argue with a disease and just hope and pray things get better after he sees the DR. Then this am he isn't talking to me and acting like I am the one that did wrong because I left. Now he wants to quite his job and wont talk to me about anything. He just says "I don't feel like talking to you about this" or "I dont want you to be involved" I am his wife for goodness sake. I feel like ripping my hair out! NOW I am at work freaking out and I can't even leave cause I have a huge meeting today that could literally make or break my position and now he wants to quite his job he has only had for a month! I don't know how much more of this I can take! Thanks for letting me rant.

lilgrlblu63

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Re: My Husband has BiPolar Disorder Posted: 04-26-08 16:10pm


Jessicab1, I know exactly how you are feeling and my heart goes out to you. I left my husband almost 3 years ago. We still see each other and he has had numerous affairs. He is having one now. He is lying about it and I feel the same as you do. I am in love with my husband, but I don't know the man he is now. He tells me he wants me, but still has sex with others. That tears me up so bad. I take it very personal and it hurts my heart and soul. But I have been told here that I should go to a therapist and thinking about it over the past few weeks. I believe they are right. This place has been a gem for me and I am glad I found it. Take care of you. I have let things get out of hand with me and now I am on the verge of losing my job because of all this. Get the help you need to make yourself ok.

kujayhawks

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Posted: 05-12-08 14:34pm


I've lived the nightmare. My wife blamed me for her depression, started drinking with these bizarre friends, would come home and throw up all over my house until it finally climaxed with her filing for divorce and running off with some other guy. Now she's on her medications and she wants her family back. On her meds she's a sweet and loving wife, off her med she is satan.