2 bulging dics

Let me give you the history first.
Four years ago I hurt my back when we moved. I did pt, esi, and chiropractor. Got better for a while, then I reinjured it at work. More pt.. But was denied surgery. Did chiro on my own, until I couldn't afford it anymore. Then I injured it again.. Doing pt now. But it is not helping (again). I have 2 bulging dics (l3-l4 and l1-l2) and one herniation at l5-s1. I have severe lower back pain, my right foot is numb and I have sciatica pain going down my right buttock and at times, into my right hip. I also were a lumbar corset at all times, excpet when sleeping.

I really can't take the pain anymore. 4 years is a long time to deal with this. Any mis-step, strain, lift has always caused short-term pain.. But the 2 re-injuries are extreme and last a long time.

I mostly just want to vent somewhere where someone understands.

I have a desk job and the sitting for 8 hours can send me into fits of tears some days. I take vicodin and naproxen, but I seem to have built up immunity for vicodin, as I have to take 2 to feel any relief. So I don't take any, I don't want to become addicted. I traded a friend for some percocet, and only take them at night so I can sleep. Plus the painkillers are making me gain weight...( I just lost over 60 pounds... I refuse to put it all back on)

i have 2 more weeks of pt, then my neurosurgeon appointment. I think i'm going to tell him I want surgery. (laminectomyand discectomy)

but... I've read several times that people that have surgery either re-herniate and need more surgery, or the surgery is not successful (either scar tissue or nerve damage)

i guess i'm just confused and stressed and scared.

The one thing I do know is that I need to do something. I can't live like this. I'm 36 years old and feel like i'm 90..


Thanks for listening (reading) to me rant.. Sometimes it's just overwhelming..


Brenda