About 2 years ago I had my first panic
attack duringa stressful situation and
smoking marijana ( not sure if the
marijuana sparked it???) since I didnt
know what a panic attack was and felt
crazy, I didnt tell anyone for over a
year. I just worried and worried. It
was so hard for me to accept. Before
this my life was prefect. I was
confident, maturing, loved to give love.
I went to the doctor finally but insecure
I didnt tell him I had a panic attack. I
just said I had anxiety. He said I had
generalized anxiety and depression. Well
I didnt take my meds right. I drank, not
because physically I had to, because I
didnt want my friends to notice what was
going on with me. Now after years of
trying to find happiness in all the wrong
places....I know how I was fooled by my
emotions. But things arent really
better. I have this heaviness int he
back of my brain that feels like its
restricting my emotions and thoughts. I
get extremely light headed whenever I
stand up. All I want is to be able to
have fun with my friends. I am just not
myself, and its scary...Ive had enough.
I"ve already wasted 2 years of my college
experience. What should I do? I turn
21 in a week and I can't possibly tell my
friends I cant drink because i'm on
anitdepressants ( which i'm not currently
on but should I be???)) why get on
antidepressants if I cant even enjoy a
night out with my friends .....Ahhhh this
is sooo frustrating...If anyone can relate
or help iwould appreciate it soooooooooo
much....Thank you for reading
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lostoyou
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 20 Jan 2004 Posts: 170 Location: Ireland
Posted: 09-13-05 12:37pm
I don't know if I can help but i'll try.
Firstly i'm not sure about the anti
depressants because the thing is you have
panic attacks for a reason and its usually
to do with your thoughts and feelings as
you said so supressing those thoughts and
feelings which will happen is not a very
good idea because there will come a time
when you will have to face up to them and
deal with them and so taking meds just
prolongs it.
Believe me there is nothing to be ashamed
of, its not something you asked for and I
know you would love not to be having these
attacks. So please try and see it a
different way because you are still that
great person you were now you are just
ashamed which is normal but really not the
truth. Drinking to hide is not a good
idea because it only causes more problems
and makes you even more ashamed and you
don't need that, you are going through
enough as it is.
There are alot of people who suffer from
panic attacks and don't say anything
because they don't understand what is
happening to them or what it is happening
and thats ok the most important thing is
to try and deal with it and hopefully stop
it from happening and ruining your life.
I would really recommend going to see a
therapist and not because I think your mad
or anything like that its just because
there are reasons why you are having these
attacks and if you were to find out what
it is that is triggering them off then it
would be easier to control them.
You have no idea how powerful the mind is
and you can over come this. Therapy can
help you deal with your shame but also can
help you to change the way you think and
feel about yourself. You do not have to
no the reason as such as to why you have
these panic attacks but I think its
important to understand how to change the
way you think about yourself and I know
for a fact that with time and alot of
mental work you will get there and you
will be able to stop the attacks. Its
really a matter of mind of body. You can
control how you think and although you
might not see the link between your panic
attacks and your thoughts there is a very
important one.
If you have any questions or you just need
to talk to someone please write to me I am
here anytime you need k
take care!
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Jake20
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 14 Aug 2005 Posts: 34
Thank You Posted: 09-13-05 12:54pm
Thanks so much for your reply....I now
realize I can control my thoughts, I just
wish I would of known all I was having was
a panic attack. It's been a couple years
of fighting this and I feel pretty
depressed from all of it.. I think i'm
gonna try some meds just to get me back to
feeling good. Thanks again for taking
time to help me. I really do appreciate
it. Much love
