I am 23 also, married for 5.5 years two kids, I know what it is like to have no sex drive. Can you have an orgasm? For such a long time I couldn't, I even wondered if it was possible and then I found out what worked for me. It isn't a pill or a sex toy either. Lol! Now I wake him up on occasion, he still has alot more drive than I do! But atleast I enjoy it now, I never did before. If you have any questions, I will tell you more, it is kinda uncomfortable to know that alot of people can read what I am saying but I do want to help any one I can.

Khance.....Please elaborate, believe me i've had my share of orgasms. But lately, they are far and few between. We even tried getting me plenty of toys to get in the mood, foreplay, presonal pleasure, etc. But that drawer remains closed. It is so bizarre that I feel this way. And my fiance always supports me but as many couples, when we first started dating we were like two jackrabbits, and I just dont know how to get that spark back.

With all you have gone through, and with still being a fairly new mom, what you are feeling is perfectly normal. Are you on medications for the anxiety, etc.? It could be that your medications are causing a hormone imbalance that would lower your sex drive. I would talk to your doctor about this, because it is affecting your lives. He/she should be able to prescribe something to help get you back on track. If he/she won't, then there are some herbal remedies out there that you can buy over the counter. You will just need to make sure if you are on any meds that the herbal stuff doesn't interact with them. Your local pharmacist may be able to help you with the herbal, or over the counter, sexual enhancers.

I am in my 30's and I used to think it was just me who'd "lost her sex drive." there's nothing wrong with me medically I am very fit and healthy.
I am also happily married but just didnt feel like sex.
There's a site called eroticshiver.Com where they sell erotic audio books just for women. I tried them and I realised my mind just needed to 'be in the mood'. I felt sexy after listening to one story, and the best thing is that they are downloadable to your ipod. My husband is very happy because it's me who asks him for sex now. I understand how you girls feel and even though i'm not a mum, my sex drive went missing just the same! I did try other things, but this was the only thing that's worked for me and still works.
It's a problem millions of us face so I hope you find your answer like I did.

Best of luck ladies. :wink:

Well if it makes u feel any better im 5 years younger than you, have yet to experience pregnancy, and I still lost my sex drive. It sucks!! And I don;t know what the hell it is... Right now i'm blaming it on the depo shot I took a year or so ago which I recently found out they give to sex offenders to kill their sex drive! Its nuts. Your anxiety/depression could definetly be to blame... Are you having consistent periods? Inconsistent menstruation is a sign of a hormonal imbalance. Also like said above, ssri's and alot of depression/anxiety drugs are to blame for loss of libido.

I recommend getting your hormone levels checked as your first step.

... Were you on depo?

Most women dont reach their drive til they are 30 - its true

I was never on the depo shot, but after I had my baby I got the iud. And that is very common for having not normal periods, which I dont. I never have. I think it may be my zoloft that I take....Any one else on zoloft who noticed a difference.

I may be a guy but I do have a little info that could help...


Yes, the depo could have had an effect but not a permanent one.
Pregnancy had nothing to do with it in the long run but it was a contributor
my girlfriend has ovarian cysts, this had nothing to do with your loss...Physically. Mentally it could have depending on how you felt about having the cysts.
The cancer wouldn't have had a major physical effect. Just another mental one.
Anxiety and depression weren't directly related to this problem.


But here's the main thing-zoloft is actually an "upper" in the world of drugs (believe me I use to do speed I know my drugs) all anti-depressants are uppers, and so are anti-histimines. They reduce sex drive (even though for men they can cause massive long lasting erections) and often times affect sexual relationships.


I can't really give you a solution, but I can give you helpful information that could help with finding that solution. :)