Find a girl friend...:)

Is there a reason why you do it so much?


There is a saying, the devil makes work for idle hands, if you are bpored find something else to do.

But if you do get a girlfriend then make sure shes conferatable with you still masturbaiting I knwo too many people who are stupid enough to think that just cauise a guy is in a relationmship he wont wank but in realisty.. Sometimes theres no other way to get rid of that morning sunrise!

Don't really have any way to help you stop, but maybe these side effects of over-masturbating will deture you.
-fatigue. Feeling tired all the time
-lower back pain
-thinning hair / hair loss
-soft / weak erection
-premature ejaculation
-eye floaters or fuzzy vision
-groin / testicular pain
-pain or cramp in the pelvic cavity or/and tail bone
-participants experience problems with concentration and memory
additionally, your body needs time to replace some of the chemicals used everytime you ejaculate, which usually takes 8-48 hours depending on your body.

Anything over 3 times a day, everyday is already to much. A good rule is once or twice, every 1-3 days.

Forbsey,

i struggled with masturbation for over ten years. I say struggled because it always presented a dilemma for me: on the one hand it satisfied my craving for the physical pleasure of sex, but on the other, it always left me more convinced than ever that there was something very wrong about this practice - in spite of the fact that most of the literature on the subject says the opposite.

I realize that some “authorities” actually encourage it. Among other things, they argue that the need for sexual fulfilment is natural, hence essentially no different from the need for food, water, rest etc.

My dilemma caused me to do some honest soul-searching that eventually led to some firm conclusions. One is that the desire for sexual stimulation cannot honestly be placed in the same category as the need for food, water, rest and so on. Sex is essentially a shared experience. It is only when someone else is involved that our sexuality has meaningful expression. There is a simple yet fundamental and very important principle that so many have missed: it is that, apart from the purpose of procreation, your sexuality was given to you not for your own gratification, but for the fulfilment of the needs of another – specifically your spouse (the one with whom you have made a covenant).

Consider this: if, in having sex, your focus and intention is to please your spouse and hers is to please you, there will be no basis for self-centred behaviour. Self-centred behaviour, as you know, is the enemy of relationships and the basic cause of marital breakdown. This is basic stuff that each generation should be passing on to the next. God knows how many lives would have been spared the tragedy of broken relationships had individuals known and practised this principle from childhood.

I had to face the fact that masturbation is nothing more and nothing less than the practice of self-gratification. Since you are the only person being satisfied, when you masturbate you are actually training yourself – both mentally and physically - to think and respond selfishly in relation to sex. Do you think that a selfish mindset is a good thing to bring to any relationship?

The other conclusion I came to was that neither my physical health nor my emotional well-being depended on finding an outlet for my sexual desires. The fact is that you do not have to masturbate. One author said that if you weren’t having sex regularly, masturbation was a natural way of easing the sexual tension that builds when the body needs to get rid of excess semen. However, the truth is that the body reabsorbs excess semen. Sexual tension has more to do with your mind than your body.

In any case, you can successfully practise self-control. I believe that, even though it is the harder choice, you do yourself far greater service by practising self-control than by taking the easy choice and practising self-gratification –whether single or married. It has been shown that couples who are disciplined, unselfish and committed to pleasing each other -rather than pleasing themselves - enjoy far greater sexual satisfaction.

The question is, for someone who has already formed the habit, how do you overcome masturbation, given the highly addictive nature of sex. I can only tell you what has worked for me. I had to start by being honest, not only about what is wrong with masturbation itself, but also being honest about the thoughts and actions that predispose me to practising it. But what has really allowed me to overcome the habit has been my relationship with jesus. The closer I am to him, the easier it is to overcome. It is a very simple principle.

The hardest part is to be consistently honest. I had to admit to the lord that even though I knew and acknowledged that masturbation was in fact selfish indulgence and a misuse of my sexuality and that I did not have to do it to remain healthy mentally or physically, there was a part of me that craved the pleasure associated with it.

I have proven over and over again that jesus is able to zap the desire to masturbate if I call upon him when tempted - I mean absolutely take it away. However, I have also learned that he expects me to be mature enough to cooperate with him by making honest choices about what thoughts I allow to run through my mind and what actions I do that carry a high risk of re-activating the habit. If I make dishonest choices I have no right to expect him to rescue me.

Forbsey, I hope that what I have shared has been helpful to you. I have been praying for you ever since I read your post and will continue to do so, not only about this particular problem but also about the others you mentioned, particularly the thoughts of suicide. I admire and respect you for your honesty and I sincerely believe that god has great things up ahead for you. Call upon jesus and make up your mind not to surrender to hopelessness. The only answer I have found for hopelessness is jesus.

There is more I would like to share with you from my own experience if you desire.

That was wonderful. Very helpful--thank you for helping and explaining in detail how you were helped.

You could have just said jesus--but it would not have helped another without the rest. I am also a christian and female. I started having same problems of masterbation from a very young age due to being raped and having a cousin who taught me how to at 7 yrs old. It has also been a battle for me, I will learn from what you wrote also--thank you

god bless you

My boyfriend has this problem as well.. But the thing is, he can masterbate in one day, like 2 times alone, then we'll be together and have sex for hours, and he cums like another 5 times, and then afterwards while im sleeping, its like he needs to do it again.. He also loves to look at porn and stuff like that.. Which I dont mind much.. I figure, if this is the way his body is, then fulfill your need, as you need to. Its not like he takes up all his energy and has none left for me... Thats for sure.. But im afraid as he gets older, its gonna like, fall off or something.. Also, I have a question.. From doing this so often, can one become sterile?, cause I notice the change in consistency of the cum after the first couple of ejaculations..And we've been trying to have a baby, with no success... But by all means, i'm not complaining at all about my sex life..But it does worry me a little bit.. I would hate to think of it as him being selfish.. But sounds right to me..

no, this often happens after the first couple ejaculations. But if your trying to have a baby, you'll want to make sure its the 1st or 2nd ejaculation that counts, not the 5th, 6th, etc...

Jesus christ...What a crock of crap. Look kid, you're 18...Jack off as much as you want. There are no side effects. You should look into getting a partner, male or female, to enjoy sex with, but don't listen to any of these people who tell you there are negative side effects. I'm a medical doctor. Based on my personal and professional experience, there are no harmful side effects to masturbation other than the social stigma.


If anyone disagrees, I suggest you go through four years of medical school and four years of internal medicine residency first, then you'll be in a position to debate me.

It's not the masturbation that causes the problem, but rather the excessive ejaculations. Learning to orgasm without ejaculating (which really is possible), will allow you to have the pleasures of an orgasm, without ejaculating 8 times a day. There is a long thread around here somehwere that goes very indepth behind the effects in what not on this subject, but I can't seem to find it at the moment.

There's more to life than being an 18-yr-old masturbation-addict! One piece of advice kiddo, anything that's too much is bad, moderation is the key.

Youre 18!!!!!!!! Its normal for any young adult to "explore" with their body so much. I wouldnt worry about it too much right now. And think....If every time u felt the "urge" you found some willing female, you would definately be put at a higher risk for an std. Its nothing wrong with a high sex drive esp. Not at ur age.

do you imply that you have been in medical school for four years and you four years of internal medicine residency?

no, i'm flat out saying i'm a physician. Md from michigan state university college of human medicine. I'm not a urologist, but I am an internist/psychiatrist, and honestly, don't worry about any physical side effects to masturbation. There are only three possible negative aspects to too much masturbation:

1) it takes away time from social activities with females/dating, etc.
2) it may cause some chaffing of the skin due to friction (big deal)
3) it may reduce your seminal output somewhat if done repeatedly.

None of those things are serious, however, at 18. Enjoy your body, kid, and spank it as much as your body tells you it needs. I'm 34 and have been masturbating for years and i've never had any side effects. I've never seen a clinical case of excessive masturbation. Don't listen to anyone who tells you otherwise. The medical evidence does not support that there is any harm. In fact, recent research indicates that young men who masturbate frequently are less likely to get prostate cancer in their later years.

This young man is not asking for our opinions on the physical effects of masturbation. He is crying out for help with an addiction – a compulsive behaviour that he is unable to control.

Perhaps I have never experienced what he is going through to the extent that he describes, but for years I knew what it was like to be a slave to one’s own sexual desires. From my own experience, there is nothing healthy about being enslaved by one’s own body –physically or emotionally.

Even if the negative physical effects of a compulsive behaviour such as masturbation were, in fact, insignificant – one would still have to deal with the psychological effects, which can be devastating. I found that they far outweighed the pleasure I got from the habit. I can only speak for myself, but I feel so much better about myself since being set free from the habit of masturbation.

Isn’t it ironic that the very means this young man chose to bless himself has become a curse to him?

P.S. The judge who was caught masturbating while presiding over a case a few months ago brought disgrace not only to himself, but also his family and his profession. We can be sure that he did not get to that point overnight. What began years back as a private means of self-gratification eventually became such a powerful compulsion that he began to entertain thoughts of doing it in a public place. Evidently he felt it could be done discreetly. It seems that he didn’t factor in the risk and cost of being caught.

Since my last post I found a site that provides very serious food for thought for those who think masturbation is harmless. It takes a sobering look at masturbation and pornography in the light of their effect on relationships. I would encourage anyone who is sincerely looking for answers where these issues are concerned to visit this site.

The site is: all about life challenges. You'll find it under the search: masturbation addiction

Better masturbating all the time than having sex with people you don't really care about to satisfy the cravings - definitely safer.

Kiarekiare,

in terms of not catching a disease, one would have to agree that having sex with yourself is safer than having it with someone else. There was a time when I was willing to use that as an excuse for masturbating - nobody gets pregnant and nobody gets sick. However there is a downside to this philosophy that I only discovered later: having sex with yourself does not protect you from becoming a sex addict. In fact, for obvious reasons, you are far more likely to become enslaved to sex by practising masturbation than by having a partner. This is the main issue being dealt with in this forum: enslavement to one’s own sexuality.

I know from personal experience how damaging masturbating can be to one’s own sense of worth (and I never even went nearly as far as others have described about their addiction.) believe me when I say that you feel less than a man – even less than a human being – when the slightest stimulus (whether originating externally or in your mind) triggers an intense struggle with your sexual desires, often ending in you scuttling off somewhere to privately abuse yourself.

You said that it is better to masturbate than to have sex with someone you do not care about. I say both are wrong, since both are a misuse of sexuality. Is masturbating really caring for yourself? Is the pleasure you get from stimulating yourself worth the price you may have to pay later, not only in terms of becoming addicted and the accompanying loss of self worth, but also in terms of the damage that can be done to a relationship? (what woman likes to know that her husband gets more satisfaction sexually from himself than from her?)

it all comes down to how we see the purpose of our sexuality. If we are honest, we have to admit, first of all, that sex cannot be categorized simply as another physical need along with hunger, thirst, rest etc. For reasons that should be obvious and clear, sex is in a category by itself and on a higher level of responsibility and accountability, since it serves two very special purposes - the bonding of two individuals together in a spiritual union that the bible calls one flesh, and the bringing into existence of another human being. By its very nature, then, it has meaning only as a shared experience. This is why masturbation and pornography – two entirely selfish pursuits – are a misuse and abuse of human sexuality.

Is it not sad that in this age of information – and supposed enlightenment – so many have missed the simple truth that our sexuality (in terms of its capacity to give pleasure) is given to us, not for our own gratification, but for the fulfilment and satisfaction of another (specifically one with whom we have made a covenant commitment)?

Isn’t it better to teach our children the value of developing the mental toughness needed to avoid self-indulgence in any form- whether it is to do with their sexuality or their eating or recreational needs – than to take the easier unprincipled road of self gratification that so easily leads to addiction and all the negative consequences?

If we are to be honest we have to admit that it is unwise to ignore the fact that the practice of masturbation often leads to involvement in pornography. I wonder how many have read the testimony of ted bundy who raped and killed as many as thirty females. Certainly there were other factors in his background, but bundy admitted that pornography was a major force that shaped his destiny, as it has been, he mentioned, in the lives of all the other killer-rapists whom he met in prison.

I see your point, but you also can't assume that because someone masturbates a lot when they are young means they will turn into a sexual predator, or enjoy it more than sex.


If masturbation interferes with a person's every day activities - yes it is a problem, but if not then frequent masturbation is not unhealthy.